


Spin The Harry

by numbateme



Series: Hanger In A Closet [2]
Category: One Direction
Genre: Alcohol, Anger, Blood, Denial, Drugs, Escapism, Family, Globe, Homosexuality, Hospitals, I'm Bad At Tagging, Luxury, M/M, Mr Worldwide, One Direction Break Up, One Direction Tours, Paralyzed, Pregnancy, Prison, Psychology, Reality, Regret, Reunion, Stubborn Love, Traveling, Unhealthy Relationships, Violence, larrie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-05-28 15:43:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 60,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6334789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/numbateme/pseuds/numbateme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tell me where was it my fault,<br/>In loving you with my whole heart?<br/>Oh tell me now where was my fault?<br/>In loving you with my whole heart.<br/>Oh tell me now. </p><p>(A white blank page and swelling rage)</p><p> </p><p>or AU where Harry travels the world without Louis and Louis, who has trouble controlling his anger, is trying to get Harry back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

ME name’s Harry Edward Styles, or just Harry as the world knows me. For four years I’ve had a terrible secret that I’ve been holding in… or to say the truth, a few secret **S** , and these secrets have been burning me like hell, they taste horrible, and one by one they have been engraved on my skin.

I told the world my secret: I’m gay. Yes, the Harry Styles is out of the closet, I’m not a hanger in a closet anymore. But I don’t like my gay monster. I don’t like it. Therefore I decided to run, run far away from my problems. And around the world I did (move over Pitbull, I’m Mr Worldwide hehe)

This is the story of a boy who fell in love but now lives with a white blank page.

And the other, a swelling rage.


	2. (put the glass down)

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”  
  
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

 

 

> _**Remember to put the glass down.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we continue OUR adventure.


	3. (and a swelling rage)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis has a bit of a temper.

**\\\**

_I broke a jaw once before, I spilled blood on the floor, you broke a leg in return and I watched the bed burn_ – **Florence and The Machine**

**//**

** **

 

“THE number you are trying to call is not available, please leave a message after the beep,” cried the computer message.

After the beep, Louis talks. “Please Harry, it’s been a four days, please come back. We miss you; the fans miss you, the boys miss you… heck, even Modest! misses you-”

The beep was off before he could finish, again! Just like the other five…hundred times he’s called Harry since he left a week ago [sounds better than four days] and time and time again he’d get voicemail. Damn that voice, he practically hears it in his sleep.

“You know if I was on holiday, I wouldn’t want to be disturbed,” Liam said, flipping through a magazine. A _man_ magazine, that is.

“Why did you bring him here?” Louis asked. Ever since he found out that his loving girlfriend had cheated [ **cheated!]** on him with Liam, his own band member… nay, his best friend, he couldn’t even look at him without being disgusted. Aren’t best friends supposed to help you get laid not lay with the bait?

“C’mon Lou, that was a long time ago, its water under the bridge,” Liam defended himself.

“You slept with Eleanor!” Louis gritted through his teeth. “Eleanor, my own girlfriend when you had your very own, Danielle!”

“It was an accident!”

“Harry caught you in the middle of it,” Louis spoke harshly.

Zayn entered the room, holding a sandwich in one hand, water bottle in another. “Settle down guys. One day you will have to resolve this issue between you guys but it won’t happen until Eleanor is here.”

“She’s not stepping a foot near me,” Louis growled, his eyes never leaving Liam’s.

“Okay, fair enough. Where’s Niall anyway?”

“You know if you weren’t such a sorehead she wouldn’t need to come to me,” Liam whispered, though enough to be heard.

Louis stood up and cocking his head to one side. “What did you say?”

“Uh Louis…”

“You heard me, I said if you were good in bed then maybe she wouldn’t need to find the thrill from an expert like me,” Liam smiled.

Zayn saw the red rage in Louis’ eyes and spoke quickly, “Louis don’t do anything you’ll regret.” Louis didn’t listen and hurled himself at Liam who was caught unaware beneath the man magazine he was flipping through. “Don’t punch him Louis,” Zayn cried, placing his food down and watching Louis take a swing at Liam before he could stop it.

“Let go of me Zayn or did you join the cheating club?”

“Don’t bring that up,” Zayn silenced him, holding onto Louis’ arms.

“Oh wait I forgot,” he spat in his face. “You cheated on Perrie with that Australian woman. And you know what’s worse? That Liam joined in too, I mean who’s next? Niall?”

Zayn sighed, letting go of Louis. “Louis, I’m going to say something and it won’t be nice but you need to hear it. It’s been nearly a week since Harry went off on a holiday to Sicily and you’ve been cranky, mean, vile, more angry than your usual self that it’s starting to scare us. This pent up anger is making you very unlikable by all of us, including me and quite frankly it’s a turn off! But here’s the truth: you’re pissed off with yourself, not the world, that Harry left. You blame yourself that he left , you hoped he would stay when you kissed him but it seemed to only make him more determined to leave. You’re mad at Liam for having sex with Eleanor, you’re mad at Niall for agreeing with Nick most of the time with everything and also because he hangs out with them than us and you’re mad at me for being rational.”

“What’s your point cheater?”

“You need to stop wallowing in self-pity and anger or else it’ll end up badly,” Zayn said, a little softer. Louis collapsed on the couch, both his hands on his face, his shoulders stiffened and then shaking. Zayn sat near him, pulling him closer to his body as he cried.

“It’s true,” he mumbled. “I blame myself for him leaving. Niall was right, I should’ve listened to Harry when he was talking about Eleanor being a fame thirst hoe. I should’ve known he loved me, I should’ve known and then maybe things would be different.”

“True, maybe they would’ve been different but we can’t remain in the past Tommo,” Zayn soothed. “We need to get Harry back from Sicily and I don’t think boarding a plane is going to work.”

“How did you know?” Liam questioned.

“I heard both of you talking on the phone yesterday about getting on a flight to Sicily,” Zayn smiled in contempt.

“So what do we do?” Liam asked.

“Well, we need Niall,” Zayn said. And speaking of the Devil, Niall rang the doorbell!

“Hey guys,” he greeted everyone. Louis grunted seeing King following through. King doesn’t like Louis because it’s his fault Harry left and Louis doesn’t like King because he can play basketball… just kidding, it’s because Louis thinks Harry likes King just a little bit more than him. And also because he can play basketball. He was like inches taller than Louis. _Inches!_

“Hi King,” Liam bro fisted King and then Zayn.

“What’s he doing here?” Louis asked, crossing his arms.

“I’m here with Niall,” King said, walking straight to the kitchen.

“You can’t go there!” Louis shouted.

“I can do whatever I want, it’s Harry’s place,” King said, holding two small hot glasses and a bottle. “Oh and Niall invited me, said I can help in bringing H back.”

“It’s Harry,” Louis rolled his eyes.

“Whatever punk!”

“Thanks for coming,” Zayn said eyeing Louis sizing up King. “We seriously do need your help.”

“Sure,” King smiled, clinking his glass with Niall’s and they both drowned it in 2 seconds.

“If I knew drinking was fun, I would’ve done this with H all the time,” Niall said.

“You should come Saturday,” King said.

Liam asked King, who was still doing shots with Niall. “Where’s the party?”

“My place,” King said then pointed at Liam with his bottle. “You should come.”

“Isn’t that being inconsiderate?” Louis questioned. He felt a huge amount of disgust towards King that was doubling by the second because really, how can someone drink so much alcohol at 3 in the afternoon? “Harry’s run off and you’re practically celebrating his leaving?”

“Oh no no no no ,” King shook his head. “He knew there was going to be a party this Saturday and besides, you don’t stop partying because someone went off on a holiday. No, you live it up!”

“Hear hear!” Niall cheered.

“You’re digusting,” Louis spat.

“No I’m not,” King sobered up. “You are. You forced H to leave because he couldn’t handle living with you anymore. How sick is it that someone can love you so much, Louis, that they have to run away?”

“I said I’m sorry,” Louis cried out.

“We’ve heard that one before. It doesn’t matter if you write long messages, because yes, we’ve all read the sad, lonely, ‘Please come back Harry’ tweets that you tweet him every day but it’s gonna take a little more than that to convince him to come back.”

“Least I tried.”

“Nah,” King said, slowly walking to Louis. “You’re not even trying. You’re not trying at all. If, right this minute, one of you decided to really look for H, it would be Niall not you, nor you” – he points at Liam first, then Zayn – “or you Louis, especially not you. Why? Because H is smarter.”

Zayn looked at Liam who shrugged. “What do you mean he’s smarter?”

“He obviously knows all of you are coming to bring him back so he’ll be checking on yo’ moves, knowing when y’all are coming,” he responded.

Niall spoke up. “What we need to do is we need to talk to him, not forcefully bring him back.”

“What if he doesn’t listen to us?” Louis questioned.

“We wait for him to come back,” Niall said.

“We can’t wait,” Zayn said. “Who knows when he’ll return from Sicily, it could be weeks and by then our tour would’ve started.”

“And we can’t go to Sicily,” Liam said, filling the missing puzzle. “Would I be wrong in saying we’re screwed?”

“You did this,” Louis screamed, surprising everyone and punched the daylights out of King when he got close. He curled his fingers again in a fist and aimed at King’s skull, bashing it against the glass table. King’s alcohol bottle splashed straight on the floor in a blink. King sobered up and threw the tot glass at Louis, hitting him straight on his forehead. He ignored the bloody dripping down his face, and again, he threw his fist to his left cheek but he missed, the drunk he is. Louis took the opportunity and hit him again and again and one more, a few cracks heard from King’s face, blood mixed with saliva splattered on the floor.

“My fuck!ng jaw,” King cried, blood spilling onto his palm.

“Louis stop this,” Zayn shouted. He gripped Louis right hand but somehow Louis twisted Zayn’s wrist. “Ahhhh,” Zayn writhed in pain. “You broke my arm!”

“You’re going to pay for what you did,” Louis said. He lifted King by his shirt, yes lifted, and dragged him to stand up.

“What are you gonna do, kill me white boy?” King threatened. Louis growled as his arm headed for his stomach, King then caged Louis’ head between his hands and brought up his knee up to meet his nose. Angrily.

“What do we do?” Niall asked as he watched the two boys fighting.

Liam said, watching an arm hit stomach, another a face, another grab a ear. “We should help.”

“But who do we help?”

“Uhh…” Liam stammered. His head shifted to Louis… then to King… then Louis… then Niall. “I don’t know. They’re both Harry’s friends so I don’t know whom.”

From the floor behind them, a voice cried out in help. “Call me ambulance dumb idiots, my wrist is broken if you didn’t notice.”

“Right,” Niall said, thinking fast. He called for an ambulance as Liam dived in to the WWE wrestling match on the carpet. Maybe I should call the police too, he thought.

“Louis stop this you’re hurting him,” Liam called out. King was on the carpet floor, blood running out from his left nostril, his upper lip beaten to a pulp, his knuckles purple from punching and beating Louis without mercy because, yes, Louis deserved this, it was his fault that H left.

“You don’t tell me what to do,” Louis grunted at Liam who stumbled back at the sudden harsh vibe that was radiating off the Doncaster lad. Louis gripped King’s shirt, lifted it and dropped it, bashing his head up and down with it, up and down and up and down.

“You’re nuts y’know that,” King cried in pain. He started choking when Louis, froth spilling from the corners of his mouth, grasped his neck between the spaces and closed it; closed the airway to King’s lung, closing it tighter and tighter.

“Louis you’re killing him!” Niall shouted, watching King’s eyes bulge from his orbits, his arms flipping around in the air. Niall run across the room from where he was with Zayn and stopped Louis from choking the life out of his new friend, King. Louis, however, was too strong for him and, like a scene from a Chinese action movie, he took Niall’s head and bashed it on the table _splat_ , his unconscious body falling besides King.

“Louis!” Liam stuttered, seeing Niall’s lifeless body. He ran to Niall and dragged his body halfway across the room besides Zayn.

“What happened?” Zayn asked.

“Louis bashed his head on the table,” Liam said, his eyes watery. He shook Niall by the shoulders, crying, “Wake up Niall!” but all it did was shake his body. “Niall!”

“Go help King,” Zayn said.

“No,” Liam shook his head. “I have to help Niall!”

“If you don’t help King right now from Louis right this minute, Niall won’t forgive you for it,” Zayn said, gazing at Liam.

“What about Niall?”

“Niall and King have become really good friends and even though we may not know King, Niall does and most importantly, King is Harry’s friend,” Zayn said. Even with a broken wrist, he could still be calm, cool and collected. “Go, I’ll be here with Niall.”

Liam grunted under his breath. “Fine!”

He stood up, tensing his biceps, and helping King out. “Louis, you’re going to kill King over Harry!”

“He deserves this,” Louis tensed, his hands held tightly by Liam from behind him.

“Look at him, he’s already half dead,” Liam said, looking at a bloody King, sprawled on the floor like a lifeless mannequin. “If Harry found out he’s dead because of you, he’ll never come back.”

“Louis Tomlinson, put your hands in the air where we can see them!”

Several policemen entered the room, or more like dozens, pointing black guns at Louis and Liam, the ambulance men following and stopping where Niall and Zayn were. Others came to help out with King as the policemen strapped hand cuffs on Louis. He protested against them, wriggle and shouting at them, that more needed to keep him down.

“Screw you,” Liam spat out and punched his stomach and Louis collapsed.

“What was that for?”

He growled. “That was for Niall and Zayn, you bastard!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it begins [:


	4. (all around the world)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perrie saves the day.

**\\\**

_If I could, then I would, I’ll go wherever you will go. Run away with my heart_ **_~ Charlene Soraia_**

**//**

** **

 

“HOW about _Operation Convince Harry to Come Back_.” Niall suggests a name for their plan to bring Harry back.

It’s been two days after the whole incident at Harry and Louis’ apartment; Louis was charged with assault and would be spending more time than anticipated in jail, Liam temporarily moved to Niall’s house, watching over him and because Niam [Liam and Niall] couldn’t let Zayn be alone, he moved in with them. Just like the X Factor days when they all stayed together like brothers.

“That’s a really long name for a plan,” Nick says. Nick is here because King is still in hospital, apparently his face was really in bad shape. Too bad he has to stay for a week in a hospital bed. It was Conor’s turn to visit King so that’s why Nick was here, with them.

“How about _We Love You Harry_ ,” Perrie asks. She walks into the room, holding several bowls of food in her two tiny hands.

 “Yes, food!” Niall cheers, digging in before anyone else does. “Damn Perrie, this chicken tikka is really good!”

“It’s simple and sentimental,” Liam nods. Perrie takes a seat near him and he kisses her temple. “Just like you,” Zayn smiles.

“How is chicken sentimental though?” Niall wonders.

“I must say the chicken is delish,” Nick says winking at Perrie.

“Hate to be the party pooper here but names aren’t going to bring Harry back but I go with Perrie,” Zayn says.

“Obviously because she’s your girlfriend,” Liam rolls his eyes.

“Whatever Liam,” Perrie smiles back at him. He picks up another leg of chicken and munches quietly, the rest of the lads joining in on Liam. She sighs loudly. As usual nobody was talking about the Louis-King fight, the diary entries, getting Harry back for real, Eleanor and Liam [or Eliamnor]… generally anything. “Okay guys, can we talk about the elephant in the room?”

They innocently look up at her. “About Louis fighting King, Mr X who is still posting entries from Harry’s diary and most importantly Operation WLYH.”

“Those are many elephants,” Zayn smiles gleefully at his fiancée.

“About Mr X, we need to find out who he is,” Liam says. “And now that Harry’s gone it may seem more difficult.”

“And I went for lunch with Danielle the day after Harry left and she’s sad that Harry left,” he narrates. She casts her eyes down on her laps. “She’s still hurting over the whole Eliamnor stuff though.”

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry,” Liam huffs, mouth full of chicken.

“Well, it would help if you went back and talked to her,” Perrie suggests. She turns to Zayn and intertwines her fingers with his. “Zayn made up for cheating on me with lots and lots of time with me. And that’s what you should do Liam.”

“But she won’t listen!”

“Because you didn’t even try,” Zayn blurts out and Liam glares at him. Zayn clears his throat. “It’s what Louis would’ve said… and I agree with him.”

“And Eleanor?”

“I’m meeting up with her tomorrow for lunch to find out how she’s holding up,” Perrie says. “And this is what we need to do as we go on about Operation WLYH. We need to make amends with each other-”

“Why?” Liam groans.

“Put your woman in line Zayn,” Niall groans, “She making us do feminine stuff that we don’t wanna do.”

“No Perrie,” Zayn shakes his head.

“Y’all are messed up!” Nick shakes his head.

“…and we should do something before Louis comes home… in probably what will be a few days I hope,” she ends.

“Is it weird that the two sensible and sentimental people found each other?” Nick asks Niam while looking at Zerrie. Because it was true, Perrie was concerned about making amends between the boys rather than looking for Harry and Zayn was more concerned with finding Harry than making amends… and the others? They were halfway.

“That’s true Grimmy, true soul mates,” Niall agrees.

“So what’s the plan?” Nick asks Zayn.

“Well at the top of my head,” Zayn thinks. He shakes his head. “I have nothing.”

Perrie offers her opinion on Operation WLYH. “It looks like all of you need a woman’s touch on this. Right now Harry is mad at each and every single one of you, hard to believe I know, so asking him to come back will not work. So what you should probably do is convince him why he loves 1D, why he loves singing, touring, spending time with four of his best friends and make sure to tell the fans to also ask him to come back because he does love the fans,” she says but shrugs after. “But I don’t know.”

“I don’t think we should get the fans involved because it will worry them and they’ll think we’re breaking up when we’re not and it’s just temporary,” Zayn says.

“But they already have,” Liam says, sitting across him. “The fans have asked him to come back.”

“What did he say?”

“We could check,” Niall says walking to the TV. He connects his phone to the flat screen and the Twitter website pops up. He logins in and goes to Harry’s twitter page. They all read Harry’s recent tweet, which was posted yesterday:

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
I’m not on a ‘trip’ as @Modest!Mgmt said earlier and STOP convincing me to come back to England or else I’ll block you._

 

“I guess _Operation Convince Harry to Come Back_ is dead?” Niall questions, gazing at the lads.

“Modest! isn’t going to do anything about Harry any time soon so I say we take matters into our own hands,” Liam says.

Nick asks. “What do we do?”

Zayn smiles cheekily. “We go to Sicily.”

“Too late,” Perrie says. Everybody turns to her. “Oh right, um, he just tweeted; he’s in the Falkan Islands.”

“Where?”

Niall shakes his head. “Damn!”

“It’s near Argentina,” Nick says.

Liam huffs. “Oh great, he’s moved now?”

“As long as he’s safe, right?” Niall shrugs.

“Do you know what this means?” Perrie asks. They turn, one by one, to face Perrie, wondering what she was on about. “We all thought that Harry was just on a holiday trip to Sicily but he’s just moved all the way to South America.”

“So?” Nick questions.

“So, I don’t think Harry is on a holiday. I think he’s actually running away… from everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #Eliamnor should happen AHAHAHA


	5. (we're all in this together)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eleanor pleads for Louis' release.

**//**

_When a rich hitter want you, And your hitter can't do nothing for ya, these girls ain’t loyal; and I bet that bottom dollar she gon’ cheat **~ Chris Brown**_

**\\\**

 

** **

"PLEASE, I’m begging you, please release Louis from jail,” Eleanor begs, her brown eyes darting from the One Direction members in the room.

“How did you find my house?” Niall wonders.

“Absolutely not,” Liam shakes his head.

“Never,” Nick agrees.

“Ditto with Grimmy,” Zayn says and Perrie shrugs.

She quickly wipes away her tears from her face. She glares at all of them, especially Zayn. “Why not?”

“Because he almost killed Niall,” Liam says.

“Because he put King in the hospital due to serious injuries,” Nick points out.

“And he’s become very violent he could hurt you,” Zayn adds. Perrie questions him in her mind and he shrugs in response. Yes, Zerrie telepathically speak to each other.

Eleanor steps back from her spot, gazing one by one at everyone in the room and as the seconds passed, she feels herself being tossed out in the cold. She felt like the nerd in high school when the cool kids didn’t want to the nerd to sit with them. I will not cry, Eleanor tells herself. Do not cry Eleanor, do not cry!

“Um,” Perrie stutters, feeling pity for Eleanor at the hostility she is getting. “Did Niall and Liam talk to you Eleanor?”

“No,” she chokes out.

“Somebody is about to cry,” Nick mutters under his breath.

“Why did you not talk to her?” Perrie shouts at both Liam and Niall, who innocently blink at her. “And stop blinking at me because Zayn told me the trick! You, Liam, were meant to mend relationships with your mistress and you Eleanor were meant to apologize to Liam and Louis for what you did.”

Eleanor defends herself. “I did! I called you Liam, I texted, I Whatsapped you, I-”

“Was busy,” Liam mumbles.

“You’re kidding?” Perrie grits through her teeth.

“Yeah, busy looking for my best friend and when I was about to come and talk to you, your pathetic boyfriend beat the sh!t out of all of us,” Liam narrates.

Eleanor sniffs back her tears. “I didn’t know about that until I read in the news and I came down from Manchester as fast as I could. Then I went to jail but Louis specifically said no one to visit him-”

“Oh and here I thought I was going to be friendly and visit Louis and show him my broken wrist,” Zayn says sarcastically.

Perrie asks, walking over to Eleanor. “He said that?”

She nods. “Anyone apart from Harry should visit him. Then I went to his apartment but nobody answered and Louis took the key away from me so I tried calling you guys but no one answered the phone” – her words are muffled by tears temporarily – “so I went to Twitter and read that everyone was at Niall’s house.”

“Awwh, I’m sorry hun, you should’ve called me,” Perrie says, leading her to her previous spot and they both sit down, much to the glare of the boys.

“I don’t know what to do without him.”

“Obviously because now you’re a broke whore,” Niall says.

“Niall!” Perrie hisses.

This time Liam speaks. “No Perrie, didn’t you say that we need to make amends? Well here is me making amends with Eleanor: to be honest what we did together was amazing, you’re an amazing girl but I regret what we did. It was irrational and I don’t know what I was thinking at that time when I had a beautiful girl with me the entire time. Every day I used to beat myself up for not plucking up the courage and just telling Louis the truth, there were times when I was so close to telling him but something always stopped me before I did. Danielle was too nice to tell Louis what her best friend did because I told her not to say anything; it was my secret after all.”

“It was our secret,” Eleanor butts in.

“I had to face her every day after that, knowing I cheated on her, lied to her but most importantly, I lost her trust and what’s a relationship without trust, right?” he shakes his head. “But the worst part was even after Danielle was out of the picture, you were still there. You and Louis were still happy. You kept lying to him, day in, day out and you didn’t have the slightest guilt, did you?”

With a choky breath, Eleanor disagrees. “That’s not true. I felt bad the entire time I was with Louis.”

Niall says, “If you did you would have told him!”

She shakes her head against Perrie’s shoulders, Perrie rubbing her back. “No! Not true, not true.”

“It is Eleanor,” Zayn says.

“No.”

“Coming from a person who has cheated before, the right thing to do is admit it to your partner which you didn’t, El. You kept it a secret and looks what it’s done to you? I understand that you feared you would lose him but it was worth a try right? I tried and told Perrie about the cheating before the media found out and despite the hardships, we’re working it out. Liam did the sensible thing and ended it because whenever he sees Danielle, he sees ‘Cheater’ written all over himself and sees the sadness in her eyes. So he ended it and right now, he’s working on his new relationship with Sophia and he’s happy. You could have either turned out like Liam – with a new relationship, or like me, continuing my old relationship with the person I love most.”

“Aww,” Nick cooes. “No seriously, that’s cute.”

“Thanks Grimmy,” Perrie blushes, gazing at Zayn. “And I love him.”

“I love him and I can’t lose him,” Eleanor says, more of begging to the One Direction boys. “I can’t lose him, I really can’t.”

“Can’t lose him?” Niall questions. “Or lose his money?”

“Niall!” Perrie hisses as Nick gives Niall a high-five.

“No Perrie, there’re some stuff that we’ve seen with Eleanor that, I can’t believe it’s hitting me now, that Harry was telling us about,” Liam says.

“What did Harry say?”

“You used Louis for his fame, money, connections, everything!”

“Not true, I loved him! I loved him for who he is not what he is!”

Nick watches as Eleanor and Liam argue with each other, occasionally Niall and Zayn agreeing with Liam, Perrie hissing at Niall for “you’re being rude” and of course, Zayn, the cool, calm and collected lad, stays quiet. Observing, or strategically not keeping sides. Nick speaks up. “Okay, this isn’t going anywhere and being the odd one out here, I think we’ve aired out all our differences but we seriously need to work on Operation WLYH.”

“What Operation WLYH?” Eleanor asks.

“None of your business,” Liam growls.

“But if it’s to find Harry, I want to help,” Eleanor says, putting her hair behind her ear.

“Harry left because of you and Louis is in jail, indirectly, because of you,” Liam says, hitting all the highlights.

“That’s what I’ve been saying the entire time: Let’ get Louis out of jail,” Eleanor snarls at Liam. “I want him back, okay?”

“He’ll never get out as long as you’re here!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Didn’t you question why Louis asked for Harry, not his beloved girlfriend Eleanor Jane Calder? Didn’t you ask yourself why did your supposedly straight boyfriend kiss a man who loves him in the airport in front of _everyone_?”

“He’s confused! It was a lame attempt at bringing Harry back.”

Nick speaks, “Confused men don’t kiss other men in front of cameras and they’re straight… with a girlfriend on the side.”

“He was doing it for attention, duh!”

“He asked to see Harry in jail, not you b!tch.” Eleanor stares dumbfounded at Liam. Liam’s eyes go wide open, realizing what he’s just said. “Um…”, he stutters but this is what Perrie’s been nagging them about; being honest with each other. “I know this is hard to hear but it’s the truth, Louis doesn’t want to see me, Niall, Zayn, his girlfriend, his best friend Stan, his mother, his family… he doesn’t want them to visit but only Harry. And Harry is halfway across the world. So I’m sorry, sorry about everything I did to you, I really am.”

“Me too,” Eleanor says.

Perrie’s smiles at Liam, finally making amends with the people he wronged. And for Eleanor, for listening to Liam, not talking back or anything.

“Well this was nice,” Nick says awkwardly. “But Harry…”

“Oh right,” Liam says. “But-”

“No Liam, Eleanor is staying!” Perrie hisses.

“So now all we need now is Louis,” Nick shrugs.

“Oh guys, listen, Harry’s moved again,” Zayn says above the awkward air.

Niall asks. “Where’s he now?”

“Santo Domingo,” Nick says.

“Where is that?”

“Dominican Republic.”

“That’s even farther,” Zayn groans, sinking into the couch.

“Let’s go get Louis from jail then.”


	6. (#SPAMISRUDE)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis, and the boys, take to Twitter to get Harry to talk to them.

CLICK.

Zayn asks as Niall clicks on the universal remote. “Since when do we watch news?”

“Since always.”

_News just in: fresh evidence has been found by the police in accordance to Ellie Goulding’s death, early this year. The police have concluded that Ellie was indeed killed by a hit man who was hired by a top British celebrity that the police are trying to identify. However, the police have, with certain, that Ellie’s death was no accident and it was indeed a pre mediated murder._

Click.

“Why would anyone kill her though?” Zayn wonders.

“From a hit man’s point of view, if I was hired to kill them,” Niall says. Zayn nods, not understanding where he is going with this. “Maybe because Ellie cheated on Ed, or maybe she killed Ed’s parents…”

“Ed’s parents are alive. Both of them.”

“Right,” Niall nods, thinking hard. “Well people hire hit men because they don’t want to do the dirty work.”

“No sh!t Sherlock!”

“I didn’t finish… They don’t want to do the dirty work because they’re too rich.”

“Did you not hear the news?” Zayn questions. Niall just stares at him, waving his arms like “What?”, snarling his mouth. “You’re just repeating what the news has said that the hit man was hired by a top celeb and pretty sure rich is in the description.”

“Right! This top celeb just wanted to kill her then.”

“You’re the worst detective ever, Niall. When I want to kill someone I’m never calling you.”

“Oh c’mon Zayn, we’re Ziall, crime buddies for life.”

“Hey guys!”

Zayn and Niall turn around to see Gemma, Harry’s sister, with several bags of luggage near her, the last one being dropped by Liam and seconds later, Ziall’s eyes move to behind both of them to Elounor walking through the door, Louis finally free from jail. Weird enough, Nick and Perrie come along too, their arms linked, like girlfriends.

“Well this is going to be fun,” Zayn whispers to Niall.

“I have good news,” Gemma gushes happily.

“So do I,” Eleanor says, holding tightly to Louis’ arm.

“So do we,” Nick says, dropping several large bags of hours of shopping no doubt.

“Well, uh, so do we,” Niall says, unsure of himself, elbowing Zayn.

Liam furrows his brows. “Really?”

Niall looks down. “No. What great news do you have?” Gemma, Grimmy, Eleanor and Perrie begin talking all at once, Ziall darting their eyes between all of them.

Zayn raises his hands at them, shutting them at once. “One at a time guys, Gemma first.”

“Caroline Flack has been arrested for rap!ng Harry. Finally!”

“I have a feeling that that’s not going to last,” Louis speaks for the first time since the fight.

“Why not?”

“When I was in jail, I was reading Harry’s diary, trying to understand him and all. So technically, Caroline won’t probably be arrested for rape because Harry didn’t say it was rape. And for it to be rape, you need to say ‘No’.”

“She will go to jail,” Gemma says strongly. “And I’ll be staying at Harry’s place now that Louis’ back.”

“Next,” Zayn says, pointing to Eleanor.

“Louis is out of jail!”

“No sh!t Sherlock,” Liam says nonchalantly.

“We’re not going there!” Zayn says before Liam and Eleanor went at each other again.

“Our turn,” Perrie jumps on her spot cheerfully. “King is out of the hospital and tonight we’re going to his party,” – few cheers from the room – “and by a unanimous vote, Louis is not coming!”

“Don’t care,” Louis shrugs.

Eleanor cuddles his bicep. “To spend time with me instead.”

“Well then, in the end, there is no good news; Caroline might not stay in jail, King is out of hospital and at the same time, Louis is out of jail,” Nick shrugs. The awkward tension becomes so thick you couldn’t even cut it with a Samurai’s sword. He says, “I’m going to the kitchen.” and walks out.

“So, watcha guys do without me?” Louis asks after they awkwardly stood for 30 seconds in silence. Nick was busy in Niall’s kitchen, fixing up something. Perrie pulled Eleanor away from Louis and walked into the kitchen, leaving the 4/5 boys alone in the room. “Sorry about your arm,” Louis said, pointing to Zayn. And to Niall, “Sorry I knocked you out.” And to Liam, “I deserved the punch.”

“We missed you to be honest,” Zayn says, walking up to Louis and hugging him tightly. He pulls away from the hug, Louis looking at Niall on one side, Liam on one side, none of them moving to hug Louis. “Uh guys,” Zayn utters, “Hug Louis because he’s back…”

“Not speaking on behalf of Liam but I’m not going to hug him until Harry talks to us,” Niall says.

“I agree with Niall.”

“Okay,” Louis says, his face looking crestfallen. “Understandable.” To be honest, he thought the boys would be ecstatic that he was back, that they would rush to hug him when he walked in… but he doesn’t blame them, he almost killed two people that day. Or three, counting Zayn’s wrist.

“If only Harry was here, things wouldn’t be awkward,” Liam says and truthfully he’s right.

“How would he make it less awkward?”

Liam responds. “We used talk about everything he’s doing wrong and if not that then saving him from an overdose if not then complaining about his wacky guitar skills.”

“Or dating Emily Ostilly,” Niall laughs. “That was a huge mistake.”

“I don’t even know what that was,” Zayn shakes his head. “Or the Kendall Jenner phase.”

“She’s a Kardashian,” Liam says, remembering what Harry used to tell them whenever they questioned his choice of agreeing to date Kendall – ‘She’s a Kardashian, guys, Kardashian’.

“What did that even mean?” Zayn laughs.

Louis slumps on the couch, his face crestfallen. “Or until he fell in love with me.”

“Not to burst the moment but I’m not in the particular mood to make you feel better-”

Zayn hisses at Liam. “Liam!”

“-so I won’t and I’ll let you slump there in feeling bad for yourself and while we’re being honest right now-”

“You’re on your own Liam,” Zayn says, sitting beside Lou. For the first time in his life, Louis never thought he could feel his heart sink fast, like really fast, but he’s feeling it. He’s been feeling it ever since Harry walked away from him after he, the Tommo, passionately made out with him… and he walked away? Of course he did walk away, Louis mentally slaps his head. He walked away because kisses don’t keep people… okay, some people get kissed passionately at an airport and remain but no, with Harry you have to more than kiss him to keep him from walking away at an airport. But what is what Louis couldn’t figure it out. He couldn’t figure out how to bring Harry back.

Before Liam continues, Louis asks, “Is Harry still in Sicily?”

“No,” Niall shakes his head. “He’s in Santo Domingo.”

“And now he’s in Galapagos Island,” Liam says. “Arrived there yesterday night, spotted by some fan, and I have a feeling that he’ll be moving again.”

“Why?”

Liam shrugs and looks to Niall who makes a fart noise. “What?” Liam questions. He looks to Zayn, as usual, to come up with a cool, calm and collected answer.

“He, uh, to be honest I don’t know why he’s travelling around the world which to be honest doesn’t sound that bad and Perrie and I should probably do it sometime together.”

Niall suggests, “Like a long romantic vacation?”

“Right!”

“You’re diverting Zayn,” Louis points out.

“Oh right, sorry. Harry is basically running away from his problems and fear in my opinion. He’s scared about people judging him now that he’s openly gay and also the drinking, drugs, women [or is it men now?], this band… none of it makes him happy and yes, I was looking through his laptop and he was always on tumblr, searching for happiness, death, creepy stuff that sent shivers down my spine.”

“Of course, tumblr,” Louis sighs. “We had an account together and this whole time I thought he forgot about it but he was always on it. If only I had known.”

“What-what are you doing?” Niall questions, as Louis quickly snatches out his iPhone from his back pocket and types furiously, motivation deep in his eyes. “What are you doing?”

“I’m tweeting Harry,” Louis says, biting his bottom lip. “It has to work!”

“Uh…” Niall interrupts Louis but Liam elbowed him. “What?”

Liam whispers, “Let’s see if Harry will reply.”

 ** _Harry Styles_** _@Harry_Styles 21 hours ago  
Or Galapagos Island, what a lovely name .xx H_ _http://instagram.com/p/oq6a6oymjg/#_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 44 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Heard you were on a world trip…_

**_Louis Tomlinson_** _@Louis_Tomlinson 43 min ago_  
@Harry_Styles Are you coming back Harry?  
  


**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 42 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Where is Galapagos?_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 41 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Are you partying it up like you always do?_

**_We <3 1D _ ** _@1DLiveTHEMupdates 40 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson it’s an island off South America  & it’s very beautiful_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 37 min ago  
@1DLiveTHEMupdates I wasn’t talking to you!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 35 min ago  
@1DLiveTHEMupdates It is a lovely place. Can’t seem to get off the beach ever .xx_

**_We <3 1D _ ** _@1DLiveTHEMupdates 35 min ago  
@Harry_Styles THANK YOU FOR FOLLWING US HARRY, THANK YOU SOO MUCH ASDFLKG_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 32 min ago  
@Harry_Styles are you seriously ignoring me??_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 32 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson I think he is! Sorry!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 31 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @NiallOfficial why is he ignoring me?_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 31 min ago  
He’s ignoring all of uss @Louis_Tomlinson !! #dontignoreusharryyy_

**_We <3 1D _ ** _@1DLiveTHEMupdates 30 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson @NiallOfficial give him time lads :) #dontignoretheboysharry_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 29 min ago  
@1DLiveTHEMupdates we will! Thanks pal! #don’tignoretheboyshazza_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 21 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I miss you! Why won’t you come back??_

**_We <3 1D _ ** _@1DLiveTHEMupdates 20 min ago  
@NiallOfficial THANK YOU FOR FOLLWING ME NIALLER!!! OMG THANKS YOU!!!!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 18 min ago  
Good afternoon Galapagos, off to the beach .xx_

**_Zayn Malik 1D_ ** _@zaynmalik 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles have a good one mate! Z_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Get an awesome tan tooooo!!_

****_  
We <3 1D _ _@1DLiveTHEMupdates 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @zaynmalik DON’T GET BURNT STYLES!!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 16 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Wish I was there with you ;D_

**_Harry Styles_** _@Harry_Styles 11 min ago_  
@1DLiveTHEMupdates Haha I have my new, Spanish sunscreen with me ;), I’ll be safe  http://instagram.com/p/nF733umxeM/# ****  
  


**_Lana Del Styles’_ ** _@LanaDelRay 8 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I miss you! Have fun without me ;)_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 7 min ago  
@LanaDelRay He will!!!!_

__  
**Harry Del Ray** @Harry_Styles 4 min ago  
@LanaDelRay I’ll think of you when I lie down on the beach babe, haha xoxo Harry Del Ray :D

**_Lana Del Styles_ ** _@LanaDelRay 2 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I like Harry Del Ray xoxo_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 2 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I know you’re ignoring me but please say something to me, anything! Anything to know you’re safe and sound and you’re probably not mad at me…_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 2 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Let him enjoy the beach Looooooouis!!_

**_Harry Del Ray_ ** _@Harry_Styles 20 sec ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson anything?_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 15 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles Yes :D! And have you seen the top worldwide trend? It’s #LarryStylinson!!_

**_Harry Del Ray_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 sec ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Stop clogging my mentions with incessantly commenting on everything I tweet to people .xx H #SPAMISRUDE !_


	7. (kiss me you fool)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis is on a mission to find out the truth about himself... and he may like what he finds out.

**//**

_No matter gay, straight, or your bi, lesbian, transgender life, Rejoice and love yourself today, Cause God makes no mistakes, I was born to be brave_ **_~ Lady Gaga_**

**\\\**

** **

 

“LADIES and gentlemen… and others, or ants and ladies, whatever, we’re gathered here today to celebrate the lives of two amazing people,” Niall begins. “One is Harry Styles, who has been our friend for ages right now and we want to bring him back by reminding him what he has left behind-”

“That’s what I said,” says Perrie.

“Ssshh,” Nick shushes. He places his forefinger to his lips towards Perrie. “He’s talking about Operation WLYH.”

“Well he’s just repeating what I just said,” Perrie clarifies.

“And as I continue.” Niall clears his throat. “The other person who is amazing is Louis Tomlinson.” Eleanor sways her head to Louis’ shoulders, slipping her arm around his bicep. “Louis is, as we all recently found out, is very violent that I’m starting to wander why we hired bodyguards. He’s got a lot of wit, he’s funny, he’s super talented, when he loves you he really does, he’s very protective over those he cares like us, his family,” – he pauses and then continues – “his girlfriend, Eleanor, and so on and so forth but most importantly, it’s Louis who is going to help us bring Harry back, along with Grimmy.”

“Here here.” Liam raised his glass and clinked with Nick’s glass. “If I knew Harry kept all this booze, I would’ve started drinking too.”

“It’s fun, innit?” Nick says.

“So, for a start, I do know who Mr X is and he is in this room right now.” Niall says. Immediately, the people in the room dart their eyes at each other; Liam looks suspiciously at Louis, Louis eyes Zayn who darts his eyes to Nick, Nick at Perrie to Eleanor and Eleanor to Niall. “It’s not me, Perrie. But he’s here so all we need to do is find out who he is. Or you guys need to find out who he is, then Mr X apologizes to Harry and all is forgiven.”

“What a plan!” cheers Gemma.

“On the other hand, Gemma, Louis and Nick should work more on the Operation WLYH.”

“What about us?” Liam asks.

“I’ll think about it.”

“POLICE OPEN UP!”

Perrie twists her body to face the door. “What’s that?” she asks.

“POLICE OPEN UP!”

Liam walks to the door, three policemen in neon jackets and walkie talkies talking in low voices over the intercom. “May I help you?”

“Is Nicholas Grimshaw here?”

“Yes, that’s me,” Nick says, stopping himself near Liam at the door. “What may I do for you?”

“You’re under arrest for the murder of Ellie Goulding! Hands behind your back, Mr Grimshaw.”

“But-” Before Nick could protest, cuffs were locked together behind Nick’s back, lost boys in Niall’s house watching the happenings before them.

“We’ll get you out,” Niall promises him.

“Thank goodness he’s being arrested,” Louis whispers, Zayn elbowing his stomach. “Ow!”

The policeman asks them, “We have already arrested Kingston but where is Harry?”

“We don’t know,” Zayn answers quickly.

“Okay, thank you.” And off they went, leaving the rest of them dumbfounded, with fast, beating hearts.

“For once I’m happy Harry isn’t here,” Louis smiles. “And today is by far the greatest day ever.”

Gemma sighs. “Listen here Tomlinson, no matter how much you hate Grimmy, you need to face the fact that Harry Styles likes Nick Grimshaw and yes, they do occasionally have sex. Deal. With. It!”

“Oh and you? I finally got what Harry meant when he kept asking me if I think he’s a monster,” Louis says.

Gemma’s face grow pale. “He asked you that?”

He nods. “We were cuddling that night and he kept asking me if I think he’s a monster and I said no, then he asked if he hated me, whether I really and honestly hated him, and I told him some dumb story that it wasn’t your fault but now I realize that it was. You were also part of the reason he also left, I may be blamed for having chased him away but it was your fault too.” He shakes his head, blinking quickly to stop the tears. “You should’ve forgiven him.”

“You know this is good, this is really good,” Zayn says, nodding. “We need to find out why we chased Harry and oh my gosh, can we please start the Operation WLYH.”

Minutes later, they all sat together on the carpet, and in the middle was a medium, yellow bowl of salad… a salad of cookies, that is. Liam begins. “Okay I’ll start. I personally feel that I pressured Harry into writing songs for the album and as was my wish, he quit the band.”

“He hasn’t quit,” Louis hisses.

“Your turn, Sophia,” Zayn says. [Liam called Sophia to join them]. “I don’t see how I could’ve chased him away.”

“Fair enough,” Perrie nods. “I wasn’t there for him. I barely spoke to him and usually I’m really good at seeing someone who is struggling with something internally but with Harry I couldn’t see it and so I blame myself for not helping him.”

Zayn smooches his fiancée’s temple. “It’s not your fault darling,” he cooes. “I also feel the same with Perrie. I couldn’t see it… um, I could but I didn’t do anything about it. I was the first to notice he’s into drugs and alcohol and all those bad stuff but I simply watched him do it, I didn’t even bother to stop it. To be honest, I thought Louis would stop him.” A flash of guilt waves through Louis’ face. “But he didn’t and by then it was too late. I knew what he was getting himself into but I didn’t stop him. So for that, I blame myself for letting him go.”

Eleanor asks. “You knew he was into drugs?”

He shrugs. “Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you do anything?” Eleanor asks Louis.

“How was I supposed to know?!”

“My turn!” Niall cheers. “I’m a bit like Zayn and Perrie. I knew Harry was lying to me, us, about everything. When we asked him if he was okay, he would shrug-”

Louis say, “I’m fine,” mimicking Harry’s words he used to tell him.

“Exactly! And then after he would drown himself in alcohol to forget everything that happened that day. For some odd reason he would drink more when we had a meeting than other days so I’m saying Modest! is another reason for Harry leaving but I’m digressing. I blame myself for not seeing through the lies.”

It was Louis’ turn. “I’m 90% the reason Harry left, he aired it all out in his diary, the Youtube video a month ago, um what else, oh yes, he friggin’ loves me and I didn’t even know it. Not once not twice, not thrice and I don’t know where I’m going with this but all I’m saying is, I’m not listing why I made Harry leave because I thought about it in jail and I don’t want to depress myself anymore and… why are we still staying in Niall’s house?”

“Well, now you’re just rambling Louis and going off topic,” Zayn says. “El, you’re up!”

“Um,” she mutters. Eleanor was dangerously close to Louis’ level in making Harry leave; she was a beard – the beard, according to the Larry Stylinson shippers which she called them “vile, deluded fans” [of course, she regrets it], she cheated on Louis and Harry kept it a secret [now he understands why he kept it a secret], she watched, along with the entire world, her boyfriend stick his tongue down Harry’s throat… and enjoy it! “I…I don’t know what to say.”

Niall coughs. “Beard.” And coughs again.

“Niall!” Perrie hisses.

“I’m not,” she says sternly. And looks pleadingly at her boyfriend, “Am I?”

“No,” Louis says, uncertainty in his voice. “Not exactly.”

“Not exactly?”

“I made out with Harry so that sorta makes you a beard,” Louis muttered very fast.

“Excuse me?”

“It sorta is true,” shrugs Liam. “Your boyfriend making out with another gay guy is, you know, fits the beard description.”

She stomps her foot. “I’m not a beard. I never was, never am nor will I ever be a beard. I’m a human being with feelings, genuine ones, and being a beard is the highest form of insult one can be given.”

“Or a cheater,” Louis adds.

“I said I was sorry. Liam and I are both sorry.”

“I forgave Liam, I’m getting round to forgiving you,” Louis says. “And I’m going to sleep now.”

“But Operation WLYH?” Zayn questions, watching Louis stand up.

Eleanor nods, holding out her hand for Louis to take. “Me too.”

“Alone,” he says, maintaining his gaze with her.

“Louis!” Perrie hisses.

“You know you sound bad when you hiss at people!” Niall informs Perrie.

“Niall!” Perrie hisses.

Louis walks away from them, feeling their intense gaze on them. It may have been only 6:33PM but early to bed early to rise, right? Who was he kidding; he just wanted to be away from Eleanor.

He locks the guest room door behind him with a key and plops on the bed, it bouncing with the sudden weight. It’s like she’s always around nowadays, hovering around like a noisy mosquito that just won’t d.i.e! She cheated on him and she has the nerve to remain and _help_ look for Harry? Uh, I don’t think so!

He twists and turns in his bed, the bed sheets wrapping him up like a burrito. He read somewhere overthinking could kill you but this was necessary. It was necessary to think, re think, re-rethink, re-re-rethink and think some more… about the whole Larry Stylinson issue. He rolls his eyes and turns in bed, facing the window. He tells himself, “Louis you’re overthinking this.” and that there was an easy way to _think_ about this and overthinking meant he was thinking too much about _it_. Maybe this is how alcoholics first started – overthinking!

He groans and twists in bed. “There’s always an easy way out of everything,” he thinks to himself. Thoughts run through his mind, not sure of the answer to his worries and troubles… but he knew the solution. Unlocking the door, he texts Niall to come to his room quickly. In seconds, Niall is at the door, along with Liam, Perrie and Zayn.

“Pretty sure I only texted Niall,” Louis huffs from his bed.

“We were just concerned,” Perrie says. “You’ve been in here for hours, turning in your bed and whatnot.”

“Zayn, your girlfriend is creepy,” Louis says, “but I’m fine. I just want Niall.”

“Okay,” Liam says, smiling, “Goodnight Tommo and don’t fret about Harry, we’ll figure something out.”

Niall locks the door behind him and sits near Louis on the bed, cross legged. “What’s wrong?”

“Am I gay?”

Niall’s eyes open wide then crease then turn to normal. “What? What are you on about Louis?”

He bombards him with another question. “Why did I kiss Harry?”

Niall blinks. “Because you love… I mean, you like him. You care about him.”

“Do you think I love Harry?” Niall remains silent, waiting for Louis to process his own question. “I’ve been thinking lately that maybe, just maybe I may be gay or whatever. While in jail, I was reading all the diary entries that Mr X was posting, and reading in between the lines in Harry’s entries, seeing clues and they were all there – that he loved me. Before he left, we used to cuddle at night, together, like really together.”

“Good for you mate.”

“Like together _together_.”

“K.” He pronounces the letter.

“Like together as jam and peanut butter, magnetic magnets, like, what else is together?”

“I feel like we’re going off in a tangent.”

Louis nods. “And to be honest, I wasn’t grossed out or anything. I was… I was really happy with him, our legs entangled under the bed, holy crap that was a beautiful moment, his head on my chest, his curls, oh gosh, his curls! They smell so good.”

Niall laughs, shaking his head. He was really enjoying watching Louis talk – talk about Harry, talk to him, just generally talk. With Louis, he doesn’t talk; he shouts, laughs loudly, imitates another persons’ voice, hurl insults at Management, or simply shuts his mouth. He never talks.

“And I felt all warm inside, like my entire stomach had a mini firework parade or something for hours on end and it wasn’t stopping. I felt very comfortable doing that, felt comfortable being close to Harry than you probably ever would and when it was morning, I would be sad because it was over again and I couldn’t actually ask him to cuddle with me, because you know, _so_ gay.”

“Sure.”

“With Eleanor I didn’t exactly feel anything. It was normal but with Hanna I did feel something when we cuddled and stuff.”

“Maybe you don’t like El?”

Louis thinks out loud, “Hmm. Do I?” Niall shrugs. “So what does this all mean? Is this what skinny love is all about?”

“Skinny love,” Niall explains, “is when both people don’t know they like each other but Harry likes you so it’s not skinny love.”

“Okay, so am I gay Niall?”

“I don’t know mate but it sounds like you could be bisexual.”

“Oh okay… that’s a thing, yeah?”

“Bisexuals exists Lou,” says Niall, eyeing Louis with worry. “Do you not want to be bisexual?”

“I just thought I would be gay like Harry.”

“Bisexuals still like men. You’re like… half gay,” Niall points out.

“Okay,” Louis nods. He inhales slowly and exhales quickly. “This is why I called you.”

“What?”

“Make out with me.”

Niall arches his body away from Louis, his hands up in the air in a defense mode. “No! I’m not gay Louis. You are.”

“You could be bisexual.”

“I’m not gay, Louis!”

Louis questions, wriggling his butt to move to Niall who was now sitting on the edge on the bed. One movement and he would fall on the floor. “How do you know if you’ve never tried it?” And winks.

“Because I know myself!”

“Harry didn’t know till he tried.”

Niall stops for minute and thinks. “He actually never said how he knew he was gay. But Mr X probably posted a diary entry about it so…”

“So let’s do it.”

“No Louis!” he says. “Why me anyway?”

“Because Zayn is engaged, Liam is with Sophia and Harry is in South America. You’re single… and have been for a while, I wonder why that is.”

“Not because I’m gay, you know I dated Barbara, the model, for a while then she said she couldn’t handle my lifestyle.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes,” Niall says, choking out the word. “I chose to be single because nobody knows you like you…”

“Right,” Louis fakes sadness. “Now let’s kiss.”

“No!”

“Do this for Harry.”

“I don’t want you sticking your tongue down my throat.”

“My tongue tastes amazing!”

“What to heck?”

“Don’t you want to know if _you’re_ gay?”

Niall ponders. “It would be nice to know I’m definitely not gay.” His gaze meets Louis’, smiling brightly at him for caving in. “Fine but nobody know about this.” Louis nods excitedly. “Things I do for Harry,” Niall mutters. “What do we do then?”

“Kiss, silly.”

“How though?”

“Um, I think it’s the same way a woman and a man kiss.”

“So should we lie down on the bed to be comfy or…?”

“I don’t know,” Louis confesses.

“But you have a girlfriend, do you lie down when you and El both kiss?”

Louis repeats. “I don’t know.”

Niall sighs. “You start this thing before I change my mind but promise me one thing.” Louis waits. “You break up with Eleanor if this kissing thing works and reveals that you are indeed bisexual.”

“Deal,” Louis nods, a little too eagerly.

Niall purses his lips outward, making a smooching noise. “Kiss me Lou. Kiss your Prince Charming.”

“Get serious! My life depends on this kiss and you get the honor of being the first guy I make out with,” Louis says. He slowly but nervously, cups Niall’s cheeks to his hands, slightly pulling Niall’s face closer to his. As Niall’s eyes dart between his eyes, he snakes his arms around the Doncaster lad’s waist. Louis bumps his forehead against Niall’s, his fingers digging into Niall’ face, the blonde’s breathing already heavy.

“This is where you kiss me,” he mutters, his chest rising rapidly like Louis’, both of them anxious to eat the forbidden fruit. Louis closes the gap and brushes his lips on his, remaining still. Niall doesn’t kiss him back and Louis doesn’t deepen the kiss, both of them enjoying the moment.

“Anything?” Niall questions. Louis shakes his head. “I’m sorry I didn’t know if I was to continue,” Niall confesses.

“Me neither,” Louis agrees. “Should we continue?... Why are you shaking your head?”

“Because I think you hit my head pretty hard

“This is all on you Louis, you’re guiding me,” Niall says.

Louis takes the hint [shitting happy unicorns in his pants that Niall’s into this] and closes the gap between them, once again, tasting the forbidden fruit that surely, never tasted so _delicious_. Louis’ fingers mingle freely with Niall’s blond hair, his lips dancing on his thin, yet bubbly lips. He breaks the kiss, and arching his neck to his left, crushes his lips onto him, a throaty groan escapes from the back of Niall’s throat when Louis entangles his top lip between his, remaining silently in place. _Ugh, so delicious._

Swiftly, ignited by electricity and spark, Louis breaks the kiss and pulls Niall onto his lap, and feeling the empty feeling on his aching lips soon end when Niall grabs hold onto his hair – pulling his head down, and kisses him, hard and furious. They kiss hotly, fast and messy, Louis’ swiping his tongue on his bottom, swollen lip, asking for entrance. _So juicy._ Lightly scratching Niall’s shirt, he gives him everything, invading his mouth in seconds, sucking on his bottom lip, breaking the kiss and switching sides as Louis hastily grabs to Niall’s hair, pulling him down on the bed. _Yes_.

Hovering above him, Louis gazes at the lad above him, biceps ripping through his white shirt with the Ireland flag on it. Tommo’s eyelashes touch his cheeky cheekbones, licking his lips hastily, as Niall’s lowers his chest to the lad, entwining his bottom lip in between Irish lips. Teasingly, Niall swipes his tongue on Lou’s bottom, flaming red lip, slowly and erotically, _that teaser_.

“F*uck Niall,” Louis sizzles under his breath. He wraps his leg around his waist, trapping him between lust and desperation. Niall sticks his tongue down his throat, their tongue fighting for dominance. They continue, fighting for dominance, grips get tighter, toes curl harder, shirts pulled further, moans from the back of throats and heavy breathing, when they both break the kiss.

“Definitely doing this again,” Niall says, inhaling and exhaling quickly, trying to catch his breath.

“Oh f*uck yeah!”

Niall hesitates before asking, “Should we tell the others or…?”

“No. Liam will think we’re weird and crazy. Zayn will give us a lecture about the Bible and homosexuals, Perrie will probably kill you because I reall think she hates you. So no, let this be our secret.”

“So?”

“So what?”

Niall groans. Louis wasn’t getting the hint: “Are you gay or not?”

Louis smiles. “I’m definitely dumping Eleanor.”


	8. (these secrets are like hell)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Mr X is...

**\\\**

_It sits in silence, eats away at me. It feeds like cancer, this guilt could fill a fucking sea. I counted by blessings, now I’ll count this curse. **~ Bring Me The Horizon**_

**//**

** **

 

 ** _Louis Tomlinson_** _@Louis_Tomlinson 1 hour ago_  
@Harry_Styles I miss you very much!!!!  
  


**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 1 hour ago  
@Harry_Styles How is Galapagos Island? Funny name, eyy??_

**_AFRICA & ASIA WANT #OTRA _ ** _@FAST1DUpdates 1 hour ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson YES IT IS, IM CACKLING!!!! Please follow us xoxo_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 1 hour ago  
Tweeting from my courtroom. Jail…. never thought I’d be there!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 45 min ago  
@cflack1 YOU SHOULD STAY THERE, right @Harry_Styles? #ra-peisWRONG_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 40 min ago  
@cflack1 STOP TWEETING AND LISTEN TO THE JUDGE AND ALL THOSE PEOPLE FLACK!_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 33 min ago  
@Harry_Styles they’re all a big, downright bore! No wonder lawyers never get laid!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 29 min ago  
@cflack1 Hahhaa. Didn’t you minor in Law? Criminal Law if I may add…!!!_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 27 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Doesn’t mean I ENJOY listening to the boring old judge! He reminds me of that old guy, James, who came to my party, remember?_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 25 min ago  
@cflack1 Hahaha I remember him, hahah JAMES!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 25 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Who’s James?_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 22 min ago  
@cflack1 How are the proceedings going? Any luck on your side?_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 21 min ago  
@Harry_Styles How is the sun on the Island? It’s bloody snowing here in London haha_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles PATHETIC! I have a very high chance of going to court because I ‘ra-ped’ you!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 13 min ago  
@cflack1 But you didn’t ra-pe me… it was love. _

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 13 min ago  
@Harry_Styles You were ra-ped Harry!!! She drugged you and then ra-ped you!_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 7 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson I didn’t ra-pe him! And for the drugs, he wanted to take some!_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 6 min ago  
@Harry_Styles the judge doesn’t think so, your twitter fans don’t think so, but most importantly, the ‘evidence’ says it IS ra-pe… and you know what the evidence is? YOUR DIARY DIPSHI*T!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 4 min ago  
@cflack1 I’m sorry, it’s @mrX’s fault!! But you’re not going to jail… can’t the court use these tweets as evidence?_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 4 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Why are you defending that sl*ag???_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 2min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson Shut up Louis! I am not a sl*ag, okay? At least I WAS in a relationship with Harry and you WEREN’T!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 1 min ago  
@Harry_Styles and I will be in a relationship!!! #LarryisgoingtoHAPPEN_

**_Larry love_ ** _@LarryStylinsonz 1 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson @Harry_Styles #LarryisgoingtoHAPPEN YES IT WILL LOUEH!!!_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 1 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson @LarryStylinsonz He travelled all the way to South America to be AWAY from you #LarryisNOTreal_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 49 sec ago  
@cflack1 @Louis_Tomlinson Stop mentioning me in your conversations #SPAMISRUDE :@_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 38 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles I’m sorry :’(_

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 23 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles Sorry love. The only way l won’t be jailed for 30 years is if you bring your arse to England and testify saying I didn’t ra-pe you._

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 19 sec ago  
@cflack1 They can’t prove anything, you’re innocent._

**_Caroline Flack_ ** _@cflack1 11 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles Not when you’re in stupid Galapagos Island._

****

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 7 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles you’re coming back??!!???_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles now  
@cflack1 Hahaha this place is amazing Flack  http://instagram.com/p/oYHee5sqh7/ !!!_

“OH no!” Gemma groaned, reading the tweet conversation between her brother and Caroline Flack, Harry’s ex-girlfriend on Niall’s flat screen. “My idiotic brother may actually make Caroline not be arrested for rape.”

“Just like Louis predicted,” says Zayn, patting him on the back.

“You said this?”

Louis responds. “I said that she might not _actually_ be arrested but now I really hope and pray and hope and pray some more with sugar on top that she is arrested.”

“I’m still with the old Louis,” Niall voices his opinion. “I don’t think Harry will let Caroline be arrested. I mean think about it, Harry is really smitten over her, even up to now, and no way in hell will he let her rot in jail because of him… unless she killed his mom or something.”

“He would thank her if Caroline killed my mom,” Gemma mums, her arms folded across her chest, pouting.

“Why is Harry still not talking to me?” Louis wonders. “I’ve tried everything I can. I’ve e-mailed him, tweeted him, Facebooked him, spammed his Whatsapp, Kik.” He muffles his groans by covering his face with his palms. “I just don’t know what to do.”

Liam pats his back. “Be patient. With Harry you have to.”

After that, they for a while, forgot their problems and broke in Niall’s wine cellar, after Gemma left to go to his brother’s apartment to spend the night with Perrie, Eleanor and Sophia, taking out every possible wine they could find and drank it all – some bottles were opened yet not having been touched, many empty ones were lying carelessly on the floor, empty and broken inside. They bond over “the good ol’ days” when life was easy – easier – and the thought of one of them running away didn’t even cross their minds. They had everything they ever wanted, what didn’t they like? They remember the days when they all enjoyed singing from the heart, not from the mind, where money, fame and glamor was a constant motivation to write songs that wouldn’t even last on the charts for more than 2 months – a new one would have to be created for them to _remain_.

Niall laughs, remembering a memory. “Remember when Zayn used to write weird inspirational quotes that we didn’t really understand? And now it’s Harry tweets that we don’t understand.”

Liam takes a swig of his wine bottle. “And now Zayn barely tweets. No more quotes from the wise guy, ey? Or is it Westside?”

“That’s me,” Louis roars. He makes the Westside sign with his fingers, clumsily at that, and holds it for the 3/5 lads to see – if their blurry, drunk vision lets them.

“Or when Niall fell down the stairs when coming from an interview,” Liam recalls. Niall rolls his eyes as they laugh, fondly at the memory of Niall tumbling down the stairs, rushing for his interview. “He fell down and the best part was it was all caught on camera!!”

“Mark said he would delete it!” Niall murmurs. “But even Harry fell once!”

“I remember that,” Liam laughs. “He fell walking on the red carpet for… what was the movie showing?”

“ _Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Part 1_ ,” Niall says.

“Oh yeah, Harry Potter! So he’s walking down the red carpet yeah, and suddenly he falls down, his curls up in the air,” – he pulls the strands of his hair – “like some slow motion thing in the movies and I don’t know if we secretly inhaled Zayn’s weed off his body that night but Louis fell as well and we all followed.”

Niall raises his new, red wine bottle. “True friendship right there!”

“Guys I did something wrong.” The boys continue laughing at other embarrassing memories they had together, not having heard Zayn speak. He says it louder, this time, Louis hearing him. “I did something terrible.”

“What was that Zaynie bear,” Louis coos, blowing hot hair on his neck. Zayn leans forward, setting his wine bottle on the table, a little too hard it smashes, red liquid spreading all over, some dripping onto the floor.

“I did something terrible.”

“We all did terrible things,” Louis says. “Like I’m thinking of dumping Eleanor… no, I’m not thinking I am doing! I will dump Eleanor I just don’t know how.”

“Why?” Liam questions.

“Because I may be gay.”

“You’re gay?” Liam questions. He looks unfazed by Louis’ confession, but maybe it was luck on Louis’ side, not having to face a judgmental crowd right now.

“Great, more gay people around me,” groans Zayn.

“You need to change your attitude towards gay people Zayn,” says Niall, “you’re being narrow-minded right now.”

“You’re gay?” Liam asks Louis again.

“Yep,” he says, popping the ‘P’. “Gay as a rainbow… but I’m, what do you call the people who like both men and women?”

Before Liam answers, Zayn repeats his eerie statements from before, in a half shouting manner. “I did something terrible guys!”

“What?” Liam asks.

“I am Mr X!”

Pause.

Let it sink in.

Realization sinks in.

“What?”

“You’re joking?”

“What do you mean?”

“About time you confessed!”

Liam and Louis turn to Niall. “You knew?” He simply nods. “I figured it out minutes before Harry went on Youtube to come out like Troye Sivan did.”

“Who’s Troye Sivan?” Louis asks.

Niall responds. “A Youtuber who came out last year on Youtube… and apparently Harry looks up to him!”

Liam continues. “Is that why you were so hysterical that day when you came to Louis’ place? You were telling us to not let Harry do this, to say they truth…”

“Who the hell cares about that!” Louis retorts. He gazes at Zayn. “How are you Mr X?”

Liam questions. “How could you do this to Harry?”

“I’m sorry,” Zayn apologizes.

“Fuck that shit!” Louis takes the chance and with all his drunken might, punches Zayn’s darling face, his front tooth spilling out fast, blood trickling down his nose. Liam holds Louis back and steadies him on the couch, it being a task full job.

“Let him explain what he did and why!” Liam reasons with Louis, who tries jumping at Zayn but Liam forcefully places him back on the couch.

“Well I would like to tweet first as Louis’ temper dies down,” Zayn says lamely, holding his mouth. Liam nods as Louis shouts, ‘No! Tell us first.’

To say Twitter went through WWIII would be something of an understatement and under…exaggeration? It _did_ go through WWIII: Mr X tweeted to the world by tweeting: _I am going to reveal my identity. I am Zayn Malik._ Almost nanosecond later, retweets and favorites were seen increasing faster than numbers on the NASDAQ screens in New York, insults later followed to Mr X, threats to Zayn were spread – half of them calling him a back stabber and calling him the Devil himself.

Apologizies to Harry, started by Mr X, were sent, and confirmed by @twitter, 700 tweets per second were sent to him and if it was by sympathy or pity, his follow account increased by millions, tens of millions and now he had 49 000 060 followers, officially the 4th most followed person on Twitter, after @justinbieber, @katyperry and @ladygaga.

Louis, his mind off beating Zayn, watched from behind a screen Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, you name it, go on fire. Liam on his side, watching in shock at what Zayn was tweeting, confessing that he was indeed Mr X by posting entry 95 for all to see from the @zaynmalik twitter account, him summarizing what he did to Harry, and darting to Niall, wondering how he could figure out it was Zayn that did this. No seriously, how could Niall have known? He absolutely has no idea how Zayn was Mr X. To be honest, he thought it was Nick or the tall, _tall_ , basketball player. Or even Conor! But not in a million years would have guessed Zayn. Niall was just sorry that Zayn didn’t have the guts to confess _earlier_. Like before-Harry-boards-a-plane-to-Sicily earlier.

Zayn on the other hand was given a taste of his own medicine. First his own family couldn’t possibly defend him, his mother crying outrage at his behavior, his sister’s not knowing _this_ digusting, shameful, side of him, his best friend saying that Zayn really has let fame changed him, spiting his _own_ best friend? _That was a low move, bro_ , he tweeted him. And Perrie, his fiancé? Utter disappointment in him!

But something else too happened. Or is it the usual that happened? The media got wind of it, problems piling up for HJPR, One Direction’s PR team, to come and control the damage done by Zayn but by then it’s too late. Damage’s already done. The media, as said before, got wind of it: articles hastily, but carefully, written about the shocking identity of Mr X, their very own band mate Zayn Jawaad Malik. The calm, cool, collected Zayn. The one you’d never suspect, yet, now that you think about it, it _does_ make sense that it is him. And the more people read these articles, the quicker they pressed the ‘Report’ button to @mrX and @zaynmalik’s Twitter account. The boys’ update accounts half-tweeting what the media was saying [who got their information from update accounts], parody accounts probably tweeting more truth than anybody else [because accounts posing as one of the boys do _know_ the boys… in their mind], other fandoms joining in on the juicy, shocking identity of Zayn!

Celebrities too were not to be left out. First on the list was Harry’ friends, Grimmy, King [who got out on bail for drugs] and Conor, promising to never set foot near the traitor, Justin Bieber remembering the time he, Niall and Mr X hanged out at his house, cooking pasta, Katy Perry too, Lana Del Ray, Miley Cyrus, Simon Cowell… Beyoncé! Yeah, B.E.Y.O.N.C.E and her multi-billionaire husband Jay Z, talking about back stabbers… or something along those lines. And for each insult, threat, sue, friendship lost, Harry gained a friend, comrade, people he could eventually, trust and count on, but most importantly, his reason for running away was starting to make sense to the world.

But amongst all of this WWIII going on, Harry being Harry, doesn’t notice anything and tweets:  


**_Harry Styles_** _@Harry_Styles 19 sec ago_  
What a happy sunny day, San Salvador  http://instagram.com/p/oq2bgIA1VS/ **!** ****  
  


“Typical Harry, eyy?” Niall jokes. “Oblivious to everything.”

Louis hears none of it and sternly looks at Zayn. “Explain from the beginning.” It was taking every fibre in Louis’ body not to push on his legs, grab a broken wine bottle, and smash it on Zayn’s fucktard head until the dropped to the ground **dead**. Every fibre.

Zayn begins, biting on his bottom lip nervously. “Remember when Harry introduced us to King, Ed and Grimmy?” They nod. “Well it started then.”

“What started?”

“Hush Louis.”

“Harry started seeming different. He was beginning to act hostile towards us, spending less and less time with us, being irritated by anything that Jill or Mark told him and quietly snarling at them… you know, the little things that none of you spotted. Then one day he comes into the meeting room with Management and everybody, normal as usual but that wasn’t the case, he was tipsy! He was practically already drunk but again, none of you noticed this. So it got me really worried that something might have happened because why would you get drunk right?”

“I’m sensing accusation here.” Niall eyes Zayn. He ignores him.

“He sat near me and I could smell the alcohol off him. He’s never drank to the point of being drunk as far as I know and coming drunk to a meeting too, unheard of! You have to understand, drinking this much is never good. My best friend Zack was a drunkard, and I was the drug addict, so imagine Harry now, being both a drunkard and a drug addict? One addiction is bad enough, but two?”

“How did you know he was on drugs?” Liam questions.

“People who are alcoholics are more likely to be on drugs too.”

“Oh right,” Liam nods, connecting the dot from ‘Harry alcoholic’ to ‘drug addict.’.

“Were you an alcoholic?” Niall asks.

“No. So usually, either Liam, Niall or I would casually go to your apartment,” – he points at Louis – “without suspicion so one day I thought, if Harry is drunk, he probably is on drugs too. At this point, I was begging him not to be into drugs. He didn’t look it anyway, and so I went to your apartment knowing full well I wouldn’t find anything. I remember that day, Louis had just come from Manchester and you were fighting with Harry what movie to watch… not really fighting _fighting_ but just casual fighting, nothing serious. I told you guys that I didn’t want to watch anything, saying I was tired.”

As Zayn continues talking, Louis’ bad temper keeps rising, getting hotter and hotter, hotter than lava even. Liam is connecting the dots to Zayn’s story because, who in their life doesn’t want to be a detective like _Monk_ or _Sherlock Holmes_ , connecting the clues and finally catching the bad guy? And Niall was fixing the missing pieces of the entire puzzle.

“I went to Harry’s room and shut the door. I was a drug addict so I knew where to find the drugs: his bathroom.” He pauses and smiles, remembering how big Harry’s bathroom was. It was like the size of a room! “For some of us with small bathrooms that you don’t walk for kilometers in, it took some time to find it. I called up Zack, asking him where he thinks Harry could hide the drugs.”

Liam interrupts, for the second time. “How sure were you that you were going to find these drugs?”

Niall groans. “Let him finish Liam!”

“So he told me to check behind the mirror in the bathroom and for a guy, Harry sure had many mirrors, and now that I realized that should’ve been my first clue to knowing he was gay. So I checked all the mirrors and found prescription drugs on one bottle. They were for headaches, stomach pains, throat something pains, I really don’t know but they were many. The shocking thing was that when I opened it, I immediately recognized the pill… it wasn’t for anything that he had prescribed for. They were actual drugs! So I continued checking for other hidden spots in his bathroom and for what seemed like ages, I found a billion and one drugs everywhere in that room that right now I wonder how Louis didn’t know.”

Louis seethes through his teeth, his knuckles turning white, his pupils dilated they almost turn black. _Every fibre._

“So I returned to the living room, having stolen some drugs, and watched some dumb movie with Harry and Louis. I got my guys to do some digging into the drugs but that’s a different story all together. Before I got into your apartment for the last time, I watched Harry fall deeper and deeper into drugs, taking so many at a time, probably more than the overdose levels, and I tried ways to help him-”

Niall questions, “By bashing him with Bible quotes about homosexuality being something wrong?”

“I was leading him the right way!”

Louis fires at Zayn. “You dumb idiot! You made him feel unsafe around us. Didn’t you hear what he said in the Youtube video? He said that we, yes he mentioned our names, that we kept telling him that being gay is wrong, no one will love him because of his sexual orientation, God doesn’t love His own child because he turned out the way he was…” Louis continues, amidst tears, waving his arms angrily in the air, angry at himself, angry at Zayn, but mostly himself, for not realizing the simple things that Zayn could notice about Harry changing before it was too late.

“I thought the Bible quotes would work. I really did but they didn’t apparently. I lightly told him to quit drinking so much but he didn’t listen. I set up dates to hang out with him more but then my whole cheating scandal with Perrie distracted me from him. Basically, I could not say anything much without seeming suspicious so I decided to go into your apartment when none of you would be at home.”

“The spare key!” Liam speaks up suddenly, his eyes wide awake in realization at another missing piece of the puzzle. That’s how Mr X – Zayn – got into the apartment! He had a key, which he got specifically from Louis and Harry because he got one as well. They all did.

“Harry, as usual was with King, and Louis with Eleanor, shopping in London, you know, the norm. But now that I think about it, Harry was in the house at that time, hiding in Louis’ closet… funny really.”

“The irony,” Liam says. “I see it.”

“He was in my closet?” Louis asks.

“I see it now,” Niall agrees with Liam, “hiding in Louis’ closet and he’s also a hanger in his own closet.”

“Yeah he was in your closet Louis, writing songs and whatnot. I got in, went to Harry’s room and right on the bed, like a calling or something, I got his diary and rummaged through it. I quickly took photos of each and every ingle entry. All 213 entries! Then I got out and went home, saved the pictures and created a Twitter account by the name, Mr X because that part was funny.”

“Funny then,” Liam corrects and Zayn nods.

“And I blamed you for stealing the diary,” Louis says, facing Niall. “I’m sorry.”

“Any questions?”

Niall asks first. “Why did you not save him?”

“When Louis found Harry unconscious on the floor near his bedroom door and he called us, crying that Harry was dead, that’s when I knew I had to do something. That’s when I wanted Harry to come out of the closet because that was his problem, that was why he was into drugs and alcohol… he was drowning the pain of being a closeted gay.”

“So why didn’t you listen to me when I came and asked you to not post the fucking entry?”

“Harry was about to come out, he was about to face his fears, to battle the reason he was a drug addict and an alcoholic. I couldn’t stop him, he was going to save himself.”

“Do you think he did?” Liam asks Zayn sincerely. He bites his bottom lip, thinking about it. “I think he did,” he confesses.

Louis growls at Zayn walking over to him. “You drove him away. Why didn’t you listen to Niall when he begged you not to let Harry come out? Liam and I thought he was just being delusional and talking rubbish, but you very well knew what he was saying, why he was saying it but,” – he brushes away tears streaming down his face – “you did absolute nothing.”

“There was nothing I could do!”

“We always have a choice dumbfuck,” he shouts, “but you chose not to help him. You tortured him day in day out and you’re the only one who saw it. Well you and Niall. You saw it happening right before your eyes but you just remained quiet. You watched him suffer in silence at what he had to do. It’s bad enough that we hated homosexuals around Harry but to find out that he has to come out to a group of homophobes?”

Louis pauses.

Zayn apologizes, too ashamed to make eye contact. “I’m sorry I didn’t save him!”

“And what’s worse? What’s worse is that you didn’t tell us Zayn. You didn’t tell us anything about what was going on with Harry. And maybe, just maybe, Harry wouldn’t have boarded a plane to Sicily. Maybe he would have decided to stay at Grimmy’s place for some time because no matter how much I loathe the guy, I would prefer him at Grimmy’s place, than anywhere else in the world where I don’t know how he’s doing or if he’s okay, or if he’s smoked enough cigarettes in a day because he will get cranky if he doesn’t. I don’t know that. And that’s the worst part: not knowing!” His legs give in and he tumbles down to the floor, his hands covering his teary-eyed face and shoulders moving like jagger. “All I want to know is why you had to do what you did. Why?”

Zayn replies, still avoiding eye contact. “It was too late, Louis.”

Louis shakes his head, snorting back up greeny mucus. “We have a choice in everything we do Zayn. You chose not to help him.”

“I have a feeling that deep down,” says Niall, “a part of you wanted Harry to come out.”

“Not true. I was saving him. I was saving him from himself.”

“You were killing him fucker!” Niall shouts angrily at Zayn, surprising Louis and Liam in the room. Zayn has seen this angry side of Niall but nevertheless flinches at the sudden outburst. “You killed him, you watched him slowly suffering. He actually cried, Zayn. He cried actual tears. How do I know this? Because I was there. He was crying to me, begging me to find out who Mr X is so that he could plead with him he doesn’t come out. You don’t understand Zayn. He really didn’t want to come out, he didn’t want the world to view him differently. He wanted people to like him but being gay changed all that. I seriously don’t think you understand Zayn, about the pain he went through.”

Zayn softly disagrees, “I do.”

“I don’t think you do. He was more scared of what Louis would think about him being gay than what the media would say about him and we all know how Harry feels about false rumors; he goes into a mental collapse. I’ve never seen him that low in his life, Zayn. You should’ve heard him, asking me, what will Louis think of me, oh, will Louis still like me, oh, Louis hates gay people so that means he will hate me too, and I couldn’t do anything. But you could. You had the fuck!ng power to fuck!ng help your own fuck!ng band member but you fuck!ing didn’t, you fuck!ing assh0le!”

And Niall connects his fist with Zayn’s face, Zayn tumbling back in surprise from a seething, red-faced Niall. A very pissed off Niall.

“I will never forgive you for what you’ve done! You deserve to rot in hell because no way in the Bible is it right to back stab your own friends.”

“You’re Zayn Malik,” Liam too was angry with his best mate, “you’re the one who is cool, calm and collected. The one who makes sense out of everything we do, the one who pulls us back in line when we drift off but not this time Zayn, this time you’ve crossed the line and until you can bring Harry back, we’re not friends.”

“You don’t mean that,” says Zayn, gazing at Liam. He was beyond shock at what Liam just said. Liam! The Guy-Next-Door, the All-Forgiving-Liam saying he wasn’t his friend anymore!?

“Yes I do,” Liam says solemnly, calming down Niall.

“I said I was sorry okay, lads.”

“Fuck that!”

Before anyone could see Louis move, he grabs a wine bottle from the table and smashes it on the Bradford Bad Boi’s head, thick, magenta blood oozing seconds later from the bash. But it doesn’t end there, managing to still be holding part of the bottle with rigged edges, he nails it to Zayn’s body, and drags it slowly down his tattooed arm. Zayn’s mouth drops to the floor, high-pitched sounds, erupted from deep into his voice box, it almost sounds like the was in pain. Actually, he _is_ in pain. Liters of blood were rushing down his arm like a train, following the trail Louis was leaving with the wine bottle.

“I’m going to kill you,” Louis churns at him.

“No,” Zayn shakes his head at him. He looks pleadingly at Liam and Niall to help him from psycho Louis but they don’t budge. They don’t even twitch an eyebrow at the trails of blood over his arm. “Please don’t kill me. Please!” He rolls around on the floor, holding his bleeding hand with his other fingers, in an attempt to stop the bleeding. No use really, because Louis repeats on his sleeve arm, this time from his shoulders all the way to his wrists. “Louis please,” he begs, pulling his arm away from the tight, hard grips of Louis’ arms.

“Why didn’t you help Harry,” Louis asks, pinning Zayn down on the floor. “Why?”

“I’m sorry Louis,” he pleads from the hard floor, covered in his own blood. He clutches the train of bloody arm with his hands, but the pain was too much for his fingers to soothe.

“I think that’s enough Louis,” Liam says, feeling sorry for him. Right now, looking at him, there was more blood than there was of Zayn right now.

“I need to teach him a lesson, the lesson that anybody who makes Harry cry, even a slight teardrop, dies.”

“What the-” Zayn doesn’t finish his sentence, because Louis smashes the wine bottle on a table, remaining with what’s left of it, jammed it through his Zayn’s chest, below the tattoo of Perrie’s lips, barely missing his heart.

 

**+**

 

“I can’t believe you almost killed him,” Niall says, driving the car to the hospital.

“Listen,” Louis says from the back of the car, where Zayn was who was clutching his arm… then chest…then arm in pain. Teardrops still drool from his eyes, the pain from ripped skin unbearable. “We’re dropping him at the Emergency and then we leave very quickly.

“Like in the movies?” Niall smiles.

“Look at the road Ni!” Liam says, turning the steering wheel, brushing fingers with Niall.

“And you Zayn, you tell the police, or anyone for that matter, that this was me you ripped you apart and stabbed you, I will end you!”

Zayn nods quickly, not trusting his ability to speak [if he could even] and went back to controlling his breaths…1 ….2 ….3. In. Out. In. Out. It hurt more when he breathed in but if he didn’t, he would die and if he died, he wouldn’t get the chance to see Perrie ever again. And he couldn’t let that happen. 1… 2… 3. In. Out.

In.

Out.


	9. (vanilla tea and snowflakes)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis gets solid advice from his bestfriend Danielle P....

**//**

> _I’ve given you too much, given it all up and I’m taking back my love_ **_~ Enrique Iglesias_**

**\\\**

** **

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
I am NOT coming back! Stop asking or I’ll block all of you!_

“YOU need to stop reading those tweets.”

The events of the last two days were still fresh in his memories, more so the patterns he left all across Zayn’s skin. Liam was uncomfortable staying near him because you know, dragging a broken wine bottle over someone’s skin isn’t normal, so Niall had to always be there. Because Niall was due for his knee appointment, he had to stay out of the house [Liam locked the door the moment they stepped out of the door!], and technically he had nowhere to go. Apart from Danielle’s place.

“I’m just checking up on him, making sure he’s safe,” says Louis, scrolling through his phone. He places it down, and replaces it with a mug of tea that Danielle hands him. She sits across from him, cross-legged, the mug warming her fingers. “I… I just want to know he’s safe and taken care of.”

“He’ fine you know,” Danielle reassures him. “So what’s up Louis? What’s the news about Zayn and some criminal stabbing him? Is he on drugs again?”

Louis shakes his head. “No, it was me. I’m the one that stabbed him and told him not to tell the police that it was me because I could go to jail. And he deserved it! He’s Mr X!”

“That’s not good enough reason to stab Zayn, he’s your own friend.”

“No, not anymore. He told us this dumb story that he was caring for Harry, ‘looking out for him’ is what he said, but it was all crap. He just wanted to see Harry crumble before the world, in front of everybody. And I didn’t know anything. None at all. But Zayn knew and he couldn’t do anything!”

“Is he fine?” She seems concerned.

“Oh yeah, he is, according to Perrie,” Louis shrugs. “At least they’re back together,” he adds, looking deep into his vanilla-scented tea. “What is this tea?”

“Vanilla.”

“It’s good,” Louis says. “To be honest, I was practically chased out of the house. Liam is too scared to stay with just me alone and Niall had his knee appointment today. I asked If I can come with but he said no. I can’t go to our apartment because Eleanor is there with Gemma and there’s nowhere else to go.”

“You can go back to your place.” Danielle suggests. Louis shakes his head, biting his bottom lip. “Why not? Is it Eleanor?”

He nods. “I’m going to break up with her but… I don’t know how to do it. I don’t like her anymore. She’s annoying, irritating and she never liked me at all. She just liked the fame that came with dating me, the free flights all over the world that I would pay for to come see me, the fashion shows… everything! I see it now, I see what Harry had been trying to tell me.”

“You care about Harry don’t you?” Louis nods crazily. “I really do,” he agrees. “I wonder what he’s always doing every time. I wonder if he’s sleeping alright, how many bad pills he’s taken for the day, which packet of cigarette he decided to smoke today, if he’s ever washed his hair.” He laughs at the thought, knowing full well Harry hated it when Lou, their stylist, would want to wash their hair. He would whine and protest and after much convincing, he would agree, only if I went with him to buy cotton candy. “Do you think he’s okay?”

“I think he’s more than perfect,” Danielle smiles, sure of herself. “It’s you whose not. Do you love him Lou?”

“Yes,” he says quickly and he doesn’t regret it because it’s true. He says it one more time, because he likes the sound of it. “I love Harry. I really do. But not even my too little too late love could stop him from getting onto the plane. When I kissed him I felt right, I felt safe, my heart was beating a billion miles per hour, I felt my knees go weak and you should’ve felt my happiness running through my body when he kissed me back! He actually kissed me back. And when he held me really close to him, that was when I knew that I was working my magic in convincing him to stay. But he wanted to stop so I pulled him close so he wouldn’t leave.”

“I’m sorry,” gushes Danielle.

“He’s a really really good kisser by the way, he’s the best. His damn tongue,” – Louis stops to talk and takes a sharp breath – “he’s just… he’s amazing! I don’t know how to describe him but he’s so perfect. I don’t know how I didn’t see it before. Four years together and all that time he’s falling deeply in love with me and I kiss him for barely 2 minutes and I’m head over heels over him.”

“Well, heartache doesn’t last forever, right?” Danielle winks at him.

“I forgot, you’re a fan of One Direction too.”

She glows, nodding like a child. Then solemnly asks, “And what about El? She’s your girlfriend.”

“No she’s not,” Louis shakes his head, “not now anyway. I’m going to dump her after I leave today.”

“Does this have anything to do with her sleeping with Liam?”

“Yes,” Louis answers Danielle, “She cheated on me and anyone who cheats isn’t worth my time, energy, trust and love.”

“I’m not defending her or anything but I think you need to think about what you’re about to do,” Danielle tells him, “you’re dumping Eleanor because she cheated on you with my ex=boyfriend.” Louis nods. “But the moment you knew she cheated, you didn’t dump her immediately, you stayed. But now that Harry is in the picture, you want to dump her so fast like a hot potato.”

“What are you trying to tell me?”

“I think you’re dumping El not because she cheated but because she kept you away from Harry this whole time. She was always around you, going on dates, asking you to come up to Manchester to spend time with you, taking her around the world when you were touring, and all of this distracted you from what Harry was feeling.”

“Oh great, even you could see it?”

Danielle frowns, confused. “See what?”

“That Eleanor was using me for my fame.”

“To be honest I just found it creepy that you went on far too many dates. But I think if you went on few dates, you would have seen Harry suffering alone and then, maybe then, he would have had the courage to tell you what was bothering him. But now that that didn’t happen, you’re angry at Eleanor.”

“And rightfully so.”

“Yes but you can’t blame her entirely. It’s sort of your fault too for not seeing it. I mean, look at Zayn, he saw it and you took out your frustration on him, you don’t like Niall because at least he broke through to Harry and found out he was gay. But not Liam, you don’t hate him because he’s just as clueless as you are.”

Louis remains stunned at Danielle, wondering how she could possibly know this. “How… how could you know?”

“Because I’m awesome!”

Louis chuckles. “Sure you are. You’re just a girl with really curly hair. And knows a little too much.”

“Is it creepy?”

Louis shakes his head. “No. I like it. You can see what I can’t seem to see.”

Danielle sips her tea and casually asks him, “So you’re definitely gay?”

Louis nods. “Bisexual as Niall says.”

“How does Niall know this?”

Louis is lost for words for the second time. How can he explain that he and Niall kiss to make sure that he really is gay and not just gay because he’s desperate for making Harry come back.

“We, uh, sort of…”

“Is he your casual hookup?... Niall is gay?”

“No, no no no no!” Louis shakes his head. “We don’t hookup or anything, we just kiss that’s it.. I’m saving myself for Harry, sorry if that sounds cheesy, but it’s true.”

“I’m sure he’ll appreciate it that you’re saving yourself until he comes back which he will soon. But do you ever think about Niall when you’re kissing him?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re here kissing an innocent, straight friend, every single day and he doesn’t object at all?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Isn’t that weird? I mean Niall is practically kissing you and he claims to be straight? I think he either likes you or he’s really gay just like you.”

Louis forms an O shape with his lip. “Ooh! I see what you mean. You think Niall likes me?”

“Maybe. Maybe you, maybe…”

Louis smiles mischievously. “You think Niall likes someone else? Some other guy? Some other guy in our band?” Louis’ eyes shine bright like diamonds at the thought of mystery in his life. Even if it was to forget the worry he has for Harry. This is why he liked Danielle, even it was only for 3 hours, he would forget his troubles and casually laugh, actually hang out. Like normal.

Danielle joins in on the momentum. Louis places his mug on the floor and sits up close to Danielle, thighs touching like friends. “We should figure out who!”

 

+

 

“You’re crazy Ni,” King chuckles. “You should check your batch of coke that it wasn’t drugged!”

“I’m helping him before Harry comes back,” Niall says.

“So you’re helping Louis become a good kisser by casually making out with him and nobody else knows about this?”

“Yep,” Niall says. He inhales a line of coke, shaking his head and sniffing any snowflakes remaining stuck in his nose.

“And this is doing nothing for ya?”

He stops dead in his tracks, looking up at Niall through squinted eyes. “What do you mean?”

“You’re doing the exact same thing Nick and H do… or used to do. Nick and H started of kissing casually and one thing led to another they started having sex on the regular, hookups here and there and something bad happened. Nick fell in love with H, H didn’t know, but we did. We saw it. Ed advised Nick to stay away but he was already charmed by H and from what I hear he’s good in bed. This is where you and Louis are right now, casual kissing and now I know Louis is getting something dumb out of you-”

Niall interrupts. “I’m helping him get comfortable with kissing guys.”

“Like I said, dumb. You, however, are getting _nada_ from this. You will get something though – feelings for Louis and I’m going to be the first one to tell you, right here right now, that Louis will never love you back. Ever.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not Nick,” Niall says, “I’m really just helping him that’s all. And maybe I’m seeing if I’m gay.”

“Are you?”

Niall’s mouth drops, brows raised slightly. “Uh.” He gathers his thoughts and speaks again. “No I’m not.”

“Do you like Louis?”

“No.”

King thinks for a minute, scratching his small goatee. “You replied firmly when I asked about liking Louis yet stammered when I asked if you were gay. Tell me the truth Ni, as they say the truth will set you free.”

“I have nothing to tell you and if we are to continue being good friends, don’t compare me to Nick and Harry,” he says firmly to King, who holds up his hands in defense.

“Does he know you’re here?”

“Who?”

King smirks. “Your boyfriend?”

“Li-y-you mean Louis? He’s not my boyfriend and no he doesn’t, I told him I had a meeting for my knee.”

“Ya liar,” King smirks. He holds up a glass for Niall to clink. “I’m lovin’ ya already.”

 

**+**

 

 ** _Harry Styles_** _@Harry_Styles  
Heard Rihanna was from here, the great Barbados!  http://instagram.com/p/on9ahyP9MM/_

****

**_Rihanna_ ** _@Riri  
@Harry_Styles It was fun meeting you Har! We should do it again sometime ;)  http://instagram.com/p/oWx8spAvtY/_


	10. (46664)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> #TeamLouis get closer to catching Harry....

**//**

> _I should’ve told you what you meant to me cause now I pay the price **~ Katy Perry**_

**\\\**

THE worst thing came to pass, the most unbelievable thing happened that confirmed Harry’s smart plan on running away had flaws: the Where We Are Tour had been cancelled. Or put on hold as Modest! discreetly told the fans. The fans obviously not trusting a word Modest! says anymore, thanks to Harry’s diary, told each other that the tour had been cancelled. Which later Niall agreed with them because there was no One Direction without Harry Styles.

Arrests had been made, people’s pasts finally catching up with them.

Nick was arrested for the connection to both Ed Sheeran and Ellie Goulding’s deaths, King was arrested for taking part in drug dealing that were worth millions of pounds and more evidence was found against Caroline Flack for rap!ng Harry, you know, the hotel staff started talking, the workers at the bar too aired their opinion as well as the jury, which was consisted of mainly elderly mothers, which influenced the arrest of Caroline. But nothing was permanent. Oh, don’t forget the arrest warrant for Harry for being involved in literally everything: the murder of Ellie, Ed, connection to drug dealing… and Harry himself, to speak at Caroline’s court proceeding and free her.

Speaking of, people continued pleading with Harry to come back, he would block them, they continue pleading, and he would always block them and post an Instagram picture of where he was. Yes, Harry continued travelling around the globe, talking lots and lots of pictures, of monuments, buildings, traditional people like those in USA – Native Americans, as someone tweeted him. Everybody tried convincing him, again, to come back – through people above in the ranks. The likes of high top celebrities, through interviews and such, asked him to come back, David Cameron even asked Harry to come back because “Britain wasn’t the same without the Cheshire lad”, Prince Harry too!, “We miss you,” he said.

Thankfully Harry started talking to his friends, not Louis and the others, but King and the others. To say Louis was hurt and miffed was an understatement, he drowned for days in tears, ice cream, crisps, talked to the only person he could, Danielle and a little bit of more tears. King on the other hand, would always flaunt it in his face, whenever he got the chance.

“This means that Harry likes me more than he likes ya,” King smiled with contempt once. Louis had come to pick up Niall at King’s house, and because Liam was _still_ scared to be left alone with Louis, he went alone.

“It doesn’t mean anything,” Louis murmured.

“From where I’m standing, or tweeting, I’m pretty sure he does. And y’know what this means?”

“Niall!” Louis called ignoring him.

“This means that we, me, Grimmy and Conor, are his true friends. The ones that he calls first then calls ya later, like an afterthought,” King said, tapping into Louis’ deepest fears. He knew he shouldn’t let King get to him but he did and King knew how.

“You’re wrong! He just did that because-”

“Cause?” King questioned, blinking his eyes innocently at him.

Louis gave in. “I don’t know. I’m trying to figure it out.”

King stopped smugging at Louis and swallowed his pride. He shifted in his seat to look at Louis who was standing far away from him. Oddly.

“Just because Harry talked to me first,” King said, “doesn’t mean that he likes me better than he does ya. Y’need to remember that you’re the love of his life. He still loves you and ya don’ seem to remember that. He left you yeah, but he’s coming back.”

“When?”

“I don’t know but soon,” King said, “I promise he will soon.”

“Why would he talk to you first though?”

“Beats me.”

And that’s what kept happening, Harry talking and laughing with King and the rest but ignoring him. Heck, he even talked to Liam once! Liam! Liam, the one who Harry does not like, Liam!

The search for Harry thus began: it was Team Louis, which consisted of Louis, Niall, Zayn and Liam and then there was Team King, which consisted of King, Grimmy and Conor. They couldn’t work together, obviously, so each of them, based on their good knowledge about their quirky Harry tried to locate him. Modest! too got on the bandwagon but they did something else, they contacted Scotland Yard to look for Harry. How? They said he was the mastermind behind killing his own best friend, Ed Sheeran and just like that, Scotland Yard joined hands with the FBI and other detective agencies to announce Harry is MOST WANTED.

Louis was violent, angry even, and went to Modest! furiousness running through his body, blood and bones. “How could you!” he shouted at them. “How could you blame Harry for killing Ed?”

“He obviously did it that’s why he left,” Jill said, “because he was guilty and wanted to run away.”

“He run away because he was gay and thought I wouldn’t accept him,” Louis explained, anger loud in his voice, “and I don’t blame him because I told him that homosexuals are disgusting people in society.”

“They are,” Jill agreed. So did Mark.

“No they’re not!” Louis disagreed. “Why would you out him to Scotland Yard?”

“Because this has gone for far too long,” Simon explained, because yes, it’s been a little over a year since Harry left, “and we need to bring him back. Even if we lied slightly.”

“Slightly?” Niall asked.

“Personally I don’t think he killed Ed but there’s a lot of evidence pointing to him doing it.”

This went on for nine months, Team Louis trying to track Harry’s next holiday destination before he went there, Scotland Yard couldn’t catch a trace of him, as well as the FBI. Unlikely enough – or likely – fans used to easily spot Harry, occasionally take a picture with him, smiling obviously, the FBI would then follow up with the poor fan, harassing with Harry’s whereabouts and whatnot, and do it all over again. Team King talked to ‘his people’ in spotting Harry which one time they were close to getting him but turns out, Harry had just left the coffee shop!

“We almost got him,” King would sigh loudly so that Louis would hear.

“Whatever,” Louis would roll his eyes.

“You know you guys are pathetic,” Nick said, “you’re not going to find Harry through his Instagram pictures. He’s smarter than you think and he knows that people are looking for him so he’s half-avoiding us and half-avoiding arrest.”

“He doesn’t know he’s being arrested,” Niall said.

“He does,” King confirmed, “he may take pictures with fans, exposing his whereabouts but that’s just to trick you into where he is. No matter how many pictures you analyze of him, Louis, or watch old Youtube videos from 2011, to get into his head, it won’t work.”

“We’re going to find him,” Louis said dragging Niall out of King’s mansion that he secretly admired.

In the meantime, Harry at the end of the day, or in the middle of the afternoon, would post a picture of a place. In fact, in those nine months, he went to every state in USA, then North America, toured Europe, a bit of Northern Asia, and was now almost finishing his tour of Africa.

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
Ghana, you are beautiful! This place reminds me of OWOA… and guess who I met? Kofi Annan, gave me some coffee too ;)  http://instagram.com/p/oiGn9ggvir/_

“He went to Ghana?” Louis questioned after reading his tweet. Like usual, he would comment, after already tweeting him several times each day. “Ghana?!”

“Ghana is a beautiful country,” Niall said. He was half-South African, not Irish like the world thought, thanks to Zayn – or Mr X – leaking Harry’s diary entries.

“Maybe he’s going to South Africa?” Zayn suggested.

“Oh right he could because Niall’s from there and it would make sense for him to maybe visit your parents or something,” Liam said, talking of Niall.

“Oh yeah, I think he will. We should go to South Africa,” Louis said, getting excited. True be told, Team Louis got there before Team King and Scotland Yard. True, Harry was in South Africa, but they didn’t catch him. But they did get something, a note. A note to Louis from Harry.

“What does it say?” Zayn asked, where they found the note, on Robben Island, where Nelson Mandela was jailed. He opened it quickly, holding the piece of paper to his face.

“What does it say?” Nick asked too, having found them.

“He loves me,” Louis said slowly, gripping the note firmly in his hands. “He really loves me. He still loves me.” Teardrops fell onto the paper, happiness brimming in his heart.

“Gimme it,” Niall snatched the paper away from Louis before it was soaked with tears. He skimmed it before reading out loud. “Hi Louis, it’s pretty obvious I would come here. I’m sorry you came when it was too late to find me but if you went to Niall’s place...”

“Sounds like he wanted to meet cha,” King interrupted. Louis looked down, regret filling his eyes but not as much as the happiness in his heart that Harry _still_ loved him!

Niall continued reading. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve done to you in the past year but if I come back I will end up here. My love for you hasn’t wavered nor is it faltering, it may seem so when I ignore you on Twitter but really, it hasn’t changed. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when the skies are grey and you will never know, dear Boobear, how much I love you.”

“What does he mean by ‘If I come back I will end up here’?” Liam questioned, ignoring Louis’ small erupts of happiness.

“A riddle?” Conor asked.

“Let’s think about it,” Niall said, “If I come back I will end up here.”

“If I come back,” Zayn said, “that means he will come back and it sounds soon.”

“Ahh!” Louis cheered, hugging Zayn tightly. “He’s coming back.”

“Get off me Lou!” Zayn said, pushing him away but he was too strong.

“Hold on Boobear,” Nick smirked calling him by his nickname, “we haven’t solved the riddle yet.”

“It isn’t a riddle guys,” King said, “it’s simple.”

“What does he mean by ‘I’ll end up here’?”

“Can you believe Harry still loves me, he cares about me?” Louis gushed.

King gave them the answer to the riddle. “He means where we are right now!”

“Oh, jail!” Conor caught it.

“I thought he meant-”

“I told y’all,” King said to Team Louis, “I told y’all he’s smarter. Catch ya laters.” He waves at them, Team King leaving.

“C’mon Lou, let’s go too,” Niall said, watching Louis grinning in the corner of 46664, Nelson Mandela’s jail cell. “What are you doing?”

Liam leaned down hovering above Louis, reading what he was writing on the wall. “Larry Stylinson. He’s written Larry Stylinson with a heart around it. Why Louis?”

“Because Harry loves me,” he grinned, showing all his teeth. “I’m sorry, I’m just really happy.”

“We know buddy,” Liam said, swinging his arm around the boys’ shoulders. “We know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayyyyyye a bit of Nelson Mandela history [:


	11. (#larryisreal)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> #LARRYISREAL

…UNTIL things took a turn for the worst!

 

Modest! Management took another step in getting Harry back and told Scotland Yard that he was part of the top British celebrities who hired the hit man that killed Ellie Goulding. And to show appreciation for Scotland Yard in helping to track Harry, Modest! found the French hit man who King hired. In return, Scotland Yard issued an INTERNATIONAL ARREST on Harry which meant that in whichever country Harry went to, the police were obliged to arrest him.

 

Louis got jealous about how good Team King, who was joined in by Tristan Soten, a disadvantage to Team Louis because he was Harry’s crush and therefore could help them track Harry [he was the one that led Team King to South Africa], and Louis decided to take King to jail, something about selling alcohol to minors at his party on Tuesday. It didn’t work because he was released hours later and now it was a fight to the death, a battle between each other of who knew Harry more… and best! Meanwhile, Louis profusely apologized to Harry for Modest!’s behavior but Harry subtly ignored him, and continued talking to other people.

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 hour ago  
@lanadelrayy How’s the baby?_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 1 hour ago  
@Harry_Styles HE is doing fine. Yes it’s a boy :) How’s Zanzibar, if I can ask?_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 58 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @lanadelrayy Sounds exotic ! #larrystylinsonISREAL_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 55 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson It does, doesn’t it?_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 52 min ago  
@lanadelrayy Awesome, the sun is really beautiful, I don’t know why I didn’t bring you here when we were ‘dating’!_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 50 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson _ _ß You should bring him :)_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 45 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I would love to come #larryisREAL_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 40 min ago  
@lanadelrayy @Louis_Tomlinson Someday, maybe._

 

_ _

And Louis stayed up all night, brimming with happiness, squealing, waving his arms in the air, throwing stuff in the air, hugging the boys randomly because finally, _finally_ , Harry tweeted him, even if he tagged Lana in the tweet. But he didn’t mind, Lana helped him talk to Harry. He decided he would buy her everything she wanted, no matter what it was, baby stuff, diamond rings, necklaces… really, anything. King got wind of it and joined in.

 

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 34 min ago  
@Harry_Styles What about me? When are we going too? Right @grimmers  & @conormaynard?_

**_Nick Grimshaw_ ** _@grimmers 33 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @conormaynard Yeah!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 31 min ago  
@JUSTKING @conormaynard @grimmers When I get back guys ;)_

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 26 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Why are you interested in Lana’s baby?_

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 23 min ago  
@JUSTKING Babies are cute!_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 20 min ago  
“@Harry_Styles: @JUSTKING Babies are cute!” they are!_

**_Nick Grimshaw_ ** _@grimmers 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Do you want a baby?_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 15 min ago  
@grimmers @Harry_Styles He does guys. Harry’s going to be a father._

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 10 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @lanadelrayy WHAT?! HOW?_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 8 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson CONGRATS HARRY! FOR BEING A FATHER! #CongratsHana!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 4 min ago  
@NiallOfficial @Louis_Tomlinson Thanks Niall! I’m super nervous._

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 4 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Why didn’t you tell me you were going to be a father ?_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 2 min ago  
@NiallOfficial @Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson He haddd his reasooons Louis!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 12 sec ago  
@Real_Liam_Payne @NiallOfficial I did. Goodnight @Louis_Tomlinson! _

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 3 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles Goodnight Hazza !  <3 #LarryisREAL_

 

And he slept like baby that night, dreaming of the day Harry would come back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #LarryIsReal


	12. (anything could happen)

**//**

> **Liam Payne** _@Real_Liam_Payne:_ Nobody really knows me.

**\\\**

** **

 

“GLORIA is hot!” Liam said. They were eating dinner in their room, at an expensive hotel in Dubai, watching _Modern Family_. Well, it was in Arabic with English subtitles.

“She sure is,” Niall agreed, “and so is this chicken.”

“You’re always munching something aren’t cha?” Zayn questioned.

“Dubai looks amazing!” Louis said, scrolling through his TL on Twitter.

It’s about time Harry got sloppy in his holiday travels around the world. Or people just got smarter. Harry’s next stop was going to be UAE. How did they know? Well, remember the girl Harry used to tweet, Raghdad? Well, Harry was on his way to visit her, I mean he was already ‘in the neighbourhood’ so he might as well stop by. And she wouldn’t mind. I mean, how many times does Harry stop by at your house to say ‘hello’? Directioners obviously became jealous that she was getting a visit by Harry but as long as Harry’s happy, they’re happy.

Not all was rosy; Team Louis and Team King got wind of it and all headed to Dubai, along with Scotland Yard in search of him. Excited Raghdad couldn’t help but tweet about Harry’s visit every single minute, that jealous Directioners wanted to suspend her and they trended #suspendRaghdad.

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
If you dare suspend @StylesMyFace, you’ll never catch me._

Duh, people stopped the trend, wore the “be nice” mask and begged for a follow from Raghdad because you know, Harry loves her and whoever Harry loves is a big deal. Louis tried his luck, as usual in getting a mention from him without someone else being tagged which still didn’t work.

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
@JUSTKING @grimmers @conormaynard Dubai is the place guys!!!  http://instagram.com/p/pOXAu3MyDt/_

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING  
@Harry_Styles Are you serious? That looks dope! We should totally go #TURNUPDUBAI_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
@JUSTKINGCan’t wait to see how drunk Grimmy is gonna get here hahha #TURNUPDUBAI_

**_Conor_ ** _@conormaynard  
@Harry_Styles Jealous about that room Harry, grab some of that lotion I see in the back_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson  
“@conormaynard: @Harry_Styles Jealous about that room Harry, grab some of that lotion I see in the back” !!!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles  
@conormaynard @Louis_Tomlinson Already did ;)_

“Louis, give it a break,” Liam said, “check his Twitter tomorrow.”

“Can’t believe we didn’t see him here, it was a waste of time.”

“At least you’re in the same country,” Zayn shrugged, “and this chicken is good, I agree with Niall.”

“Harry would ask for green tea if he was here,” Louis whined once again. He hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast and ignored any signs of himself being hungry. Looking for Harry was much more important.

“Mate, you’ve grown thin,” Zayn said with worry, “you’ve become so skinny!”

“I need to find Harry which is more important than stuffing my face with chicken!” he snapped at Zayn. Zayn flinched at the harshness and went back to watching _Modern Family_. He didn’t want to be cut by him _again._

“Ugh,” Niall groaned, placing his chicken on the plate, “Come with me.” He pulled Louis off his couch, throwing his phone to Liam who surprisingly caught it.

“Where are you taking me?” Louis asked, being dragged to a spacious, luxurious bedroom. “This place smells really good, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah it does and Arabs really know luxury, don’t they?”

Louis sat on the humongous bed with huge, custom made bed covers that looked like something on a perfect screensaver or a glossy, luxury magazine. “I wish he was here with me.”

Niall said, sitting alongside him, backs on the headboard. “Pretty sure he wishes the same but see we were really close to getting him weren’t we?”

Louis shrugged. “I guess. But he’s always ahead of us. Always.”

“We just have to be smarter!”

“King and the others have Tristan. Tristan Soten whom Harry had a huge crush on so obviously he knows where Haz could be because he probably told him,” Louis said, fumbling with his fingers.

“We have us! Me, you, Liam and Zayn. And sort of Modest! on our side,” Niall points out their advantage, “Heck, we even have the Scotland Yard with us! This is literally like CSI but now-”

Louis finished off his sentence. “A reality?” Niall nodded. “I hate reality. It sucks. Everything about it does.”

“We just have to make it better.”

“The only way it will be better is if Harry comes back.”

“Listen to me,” Niall said, his thumb grazing Louis the tiny hairs on his jawline, “we’re getting closer to him, I can feel it. I mean, we’re better off than we were like 7 months ago when we had no idea how to find him. Remember our fans as well are on our side in helping catch Harry.”

“I guess that’s true. I mean, it was a fan that spotted Harry here, right?”

Niall nods, his lips dangerously near Louis’. “And with each passing day, we’re closer and closer.”

Louis closed the gap and crashed their lips together, joined momentarily by the beauty of Dubai, the air of luxury, the dangerous air of that _anything could happen_. Louis wrapped his arms around his shoulders, Niall straddling him, and avidly held his cheekbones, sandwiching his lips with his, slowly sucking because _mmm_ , _so tasty_. Louis, fingers running through Niall’s black jeans, flipped him over so he could hover above him, his toned biceps twitching.

He wasted no time in savoring him and the moment their lips met, Louis thrust his tongue into Niall’s mouth, exploring the inside of him, with every will and passion he could master. A throaty groan escaped from the back of the Australian’s throat, his fingers mingling with Louis hair, tighter, his other pulling down on Louis’ shirt, _begging for more_. Louis broke off the kiss, Niall pulling off his shirt and Louis closing the gap once again.

“Damn you got abs?” Niall admired after flipping Louis, bottoming once again.

“Shut up!” Louis smiled but gasped when Niall went down on him and made his way, hungrily, across his jawbone. He could feel each and every single hair crushed between Niall’s teeth. “Fuck!”

Niall lifted him up by the baseline of neck, their lips connected like an anchor to a ship, Louis scratching with his nails up and down Niall’s jeans.

“Niall!” Liam called. Nouis froze on the bed, their eyes wide open. No, they hadn’t told anyone that they kiss, sometimes, because how would they react? I mean, Louis kisses Niall to make sure he’s gay won’t make sense to anyone no matter how many times you explain it.

“In here,” Niall answered. Louis giving him “are you serious right now?” look. He shrugged, handing him his shirt and Liam entering the room. “What’s up?”

“I can’t sleep and Zayn is Skype-sexing Perrie,” Liam shrugged, “Can I sleep here… unless you’re both busy.”

“No,” Louis said, butting off the bed, “I was leaving. Goodnight guys.”

“What were you guys doing?” Liam asked walking into the bathroom to brush his teeth. Niall followed him too.

“Nothing much,” he said as cool as he could. They both brushed their teeth, stealing glances here and there through the mirror at each other. “It’s a great bathroom.”

Liam said, “Yeah, almost as big as Harry and Louis’.” Niall spit into the sink, gurgled, rinsed and put back his toothbrush in his toiletry back and walked out of the bathroom. “I think Sophia wants to break up with me,” he said, stopping Niall his tracks. Liam turned around and leaned against the emerald, marble, sink.

“What happened?” Niall asked facing Liam, 15 cm of space between their feet.

“So you know I sorta cheated on her a long time ago but she thinks I’m still cheating on her now and I keep telling her that I’m not. She even went to talk to Danielle and who knows what that bitch told her, right? Then she says I spend way too much time with you guys looking for Harry and I don’t know what to do Ni, I’m losing her fast.”

“I’m sorry,” Niall said, not sure what to say. _Say something!_ he nudged himself.

“Maybe I should just end it, you know? I mean, everyone nowadays judges me based on my past, my girlfriends, our fans, my friends, Andy, Tom, my family… everyone! So why bother when people don’t want to really know who you are?”

“I want to know who you are,” Niall said, bumping his feet with Liam’s. He intertwined his fingers to his, gazing deeply into Liam’s brown eyes. “I know you’re sorry for cheating on Danielle and Sophia but you need to stop having a lot of self-loathing for yourself. You need to stop caring about what people think of you… otherwise you’ll go crazy. Look what happened to Harry, right?”

Liam nodded, wiping snot with the back of his grey jumper. “When did you get so smart?” Niall giggled [ _Smart move arsehole_ , he thought] and they both walked out and lay on their backs on the bed, beautiful covers of Dubai covering their bodies, glossy chandeliers above them like the night sky.

“I was with Louis.”

Liam turned his head to gaze at Niall who was staring at the ceiling. “What do you mean? Earlier?”

“Yeah, I was with Louis,” he said, lowering his gaze.

Liam furrowed his eyebrows at Niall, not sure what double meaning there was in what he was telling him. He dismissed it and said, “I know, I saw both of you on the bed.”

“I was kissing him.”

Liam balled his eyes out of his body and they slammed against Niall and back into his own… just like in cartoons. He was what? “What do you mean? Do you like him? That’s-”

“Louis wanted to know if he was really gay, you know after kissing Harry at the airport last year. So he asked me to kiss him and I did and it sorta become like a thing, like how Nick and Harry casually used to kiss.”

“Nick as in Grimmy who works for Radio 1?” Liam asked, still processing this new information. So Niall and Louis have been kissing for nearly 11 months without nobody knowing. And he tells him that Nick and Harry have been kissing for years without nobody knowing? Why the hell has nobody been telling him anything?? “I thought Harry was dating you know Lana, Taylor, Brenda…”

Niall shifts his head on his silk pillow cover. “He did it for publicity. None of his relationships were real apart from Caroline Flack. So in the meantime he would have sex with Grimmy.” Liam’s eyes grow wider and wider as Niall spoke, shock beyond comprehension. “But Louis and I don’t have sex, he said he was saving himself for Harry. Nothing big really.”

Liam thought before he spoke, but really what was there to think about? Louis and Niall occasionally hookup – without the sex – to prove that Louis is indeed gay and the whole kiss at the airport wasn’t a hoax. “So he’s gay?”

“Yeah he is.”

“And you?” he asked, softer than he intended, his eyes darting between the lad’s blue eyes, falling slowly to his nose, and his upper lip, his heart beating faster the lower his gaze traveled.

“To be honest, I think I’m bisexual,” Niall confessed, gazing at Liam’s eyelids, “I mean, what straight person would kiss another boy for nearly a whole year?” He laughed nervously, more to remove the thick tension in the bedroom, and because he was sort of coming out of the closet, though not the conventional way. But still, _anything could happen_.

“Is it different?” Liam asked, forcing his eyes to gaze up from Niall’s rosy, kissable lips.

“What’s different?”

Liam half-smiled. “Kissing dudes.”

Niall turns his head to look at the ceiling, mesmerized by the block patterns. “Not really, it’s the same because you’re kissing a human but dude’s lips are rougher than a girls’… though it’s fine, you barely notice.”

Niall felt his small pinky finger being intertwined underneath the sheets with his. Niall turned his head to look at him scooching his body nearer, linking all their warm fingers together. Liam hoarsely asked, “Really?”

“Yeah,” he said, through shaky breaths, his gaze darting from Liam’s eyes to his plump, red lips. Shit, why was he nervous? He was just kissing Liam. _It’s only Liam_ , he told himself. _Yeah, just Liam who I’ve been crushing on for months, just that Liam!!_

“I’m scared,” Liam confessed, his gaze not leaving Niall’s rosy lips. With his other hand, he held onto Niall’s waist, his thumb grazing his V-line. _It’s just Liam, it’s just Liam_ , Niall repeated to himself, Liam’s touch breathing fire on his skin, unable to control his breathing.

 ** _Anything_** _could happen._

“I’ll take care of you,” Niall whispered. Liam simply nodded, not trusting his words anymore. Niall trickled his finger down Liam’s jawline, his gaze following his fingers down to his chin. His grip tightened around Niall’s waist when his thumb pulled down on his chin firmly, parting his lips, short breaths leaving through. “You’re beautiful,” Niall whispered.

He took all of him in a kiss as he found out _anything could happen_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NIIIIIIIIIAM HAHAHAH


	13. (telephones)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry makes a phone call to the boys.

**\\\**

> _The way I’ve been holding on so tight with nothing in between, I leave my heart open but it stays right here empty for days._ **~ One Direction**

**//**

** **

IN the middle of a raging storm, the clouds part and the sun shines bright as a diamond and the great part, you never expect the rain to stop. Or the phone to ring at 6:55AM.

***MARIMBA RINGTONE***

“Hello?”

Niall answers the phone heavy with morning voice, rubbing his eyes as well. It had been a week after Dubai, Harry’s whereabouts on the low down than usual, he hadn’t posted any pictures of where he was, he hadn’t even tweeted! So now they were stuck, unsure where he was headed, their best guess being Asia because he was touring every continent and he hadn’t finished traveling through Asia. But where first?

They headed home after Dubai and crashed at Zayn’s place, all of them agreeing they probably needed a woman on Team Louis [how did they not think about this before?] and have been there so far.

_Hi Niall!_

“Harry?” Niall asks, every bit of sleeping running out of his body. “Harry?! Is that you? Is that really you calling me?” he continues asking, getting out of bed quickly, falling because Zayn’s beds are weirdly taller than his.

_Did you just fall?_

He denies it, hearing Harry’s laughter and to be honest, he missed it a lot! He opens the door and darts down the hallway, reaching Liam’s room first to the left.

_Listen Niall, I wanted to ask you to do something for me._

“Anything!” he says, kicking Liam off the bed. He groans at him but Niall mouths, ‘It’s Harry’ and he gets out of bed too.

“Hi Harry,” Liam greets Harry, the phone on loudspeaker.

_Hi Li! Wow, your voice is deeper than the last time I heard it._

“And you speak slower than you usually do,” Liam notes. They knock on Zayn’s door, dragging him off the bed because whether it’s Harry on the phone or Obama calling, he would never wake up, and after turning right to Louis’ room, who was sleeping soundly, a slight snore being heard from his mouth.

“Louis wake up! It’s Harry!” Liam climbs on the bed, nudging Louis aside. Louis’ eyes shot open, wondering if this was just a bad dream or the lads were playing a joke with him. A familiar, Cheshire, deep voice, confirmed his lack of faith in the lads.

_Did you wake everyone, Niall?_

“Yeah, duh!” Niall giggled, placing the phone on the bed.

“Harry?”

_Yeah Lou?_

Lou? He still calls him Lou, Louis swoons in his head. A huge smile, made of pure, soft happiness, broke on his face, color forming around his cheeks.

“Hi,” he croaks out because morning voice. “How are you?”

_I’m good, just really tired that’s all._

Liam, Zayn and Niall dart their eyes between Louis and the phone, listening quietly to the conversation. They were really happy that Louis, after a really long time, was talking to Harry, hearing Harry talk because they suspect that he forgot the sound of Harry’s voice.

“So am I, slept at like 2 AM watching _Once Upon A Time_ ,” Louis said.

_What season?_

“Two.”

_We should watch it together when I get back, yeah love?_

Louis nods, batting his eyes to stop the flow of tears down his cheek. “Yes, we should!”

_They have terrible satellite connection, or whatever, here so we can’t anything on TV, it’s even a miracle I called Niall, honestly I didn’t think the phone would go through._

“It’s because it’s my phone,” Niall smirks, “if you called the lads, it wouldn’t have gone through.”

“Oh really,” Liam says, “I’m pretty sure you had something to do with all of this”

“All of what?”

“I don’t know, configuring our phones o that Harry can’t reach us or something,” Liam answers.

“Your phone sucks Liam,” Zayn says, Niall laughing at

Louis blurts out. “Where are you?”

_Um, I can’t exactly tell you. Sorry._

“What he meant was why are you tired,” Liam says, looking at the hurt look on Harry’s face. But he has to think fast, if they ask too many personal questions, Harry would cut short their conversation and who knows when he would call again.

_Oh, I went hiking yesterday and I really regret it but it was fun actually. I reached the top!_

“I bet you fell down,” Liam laughs.

_Like how Niall fell getting of bed right now?_

“Sshh, you weren’t meant to say that,” Niall says.

“Um, are you eating well?”

_Seriously Lou, am I eating well? Is that what you really want to ask me? And yes I am eating well._

“Really? What did you eat?”

_Let’s see, I ate some traditional food from here that had chicken, beef, rice and some green stuff in it._

“Sounds delish!” Niall says.

“Delish?” Zayn wonders.

“Yeah, delish is totally a word!”

_White people, right?_

“Exactly,” Liam says, swatting Niall. “Ow!” Niall ounces in pain. “Delish is a thing and a word.”

_Have you been hanging out with Grimmy lately?_

“Yeah, how did you know?”

_Because he says such words all the time and because this isn’t going to end, what were you asking me Lou?_

“You know what I want to ask you,” Louis says, his eyes grilled to Niall’s phone.

_Please don’t be sad, I can hear your sadness Lou, don’t deny it._

“Even miles away you’re still perceptive!” Louis smiles. He pulls the covers closer to his body, holding it tightly. “I miss you.” There was silence on the other end of the line, small sobs being muffled by hands. “Harry?”

_It’s just that… I miss you too Lou, I really do, so much that it’s hurting._

“Me too,” Louis says, this time letting his cries fall and Harry joins him.

“Hey hey,” Zayn soothes Louis, rubbing his back, “he’s going to come real soon, Louis, before you know it.”

_He’s right, Mr X aren’t cha Zayn?_

“I’m sorry Harry, I really am!” Zayn apologizes, “I would be lying if I say I didn’t mean it but I did because gay is wrong but I should have told you before I did it. I should’ve listened to Niall… but I learnt my lesson, thanks to Louis!”

_What did Louis do?_

“Nothing!” Louis says, a little too loud.

_Uhh, okay then. Oh, right. I was calling to ask you a favor._

“Me?” Niall questions.

_All of you since you’re all there. Would you please go look after Lana?_

“Lana?” Louis wonders, “why?”

_She’s pregnant Lou, just take care of her okay. She may not want to because she thinks I worry too much but she needs help because she’s giving birth in like 2 months._

“You do worry a lot,” Zayn says.

_I do not… okay, maybe a little. But please look after her you guys because she may kill that baby if she doesn’t go for those pregnant women meetings._

“Natal services,” Louis says.

_Exactly Lou, you get it._

“Is… is it your baby?” Louis asks, his chest rising rapidly.

_Y-yes, No, kind of. I’m sorta the father._

“What does ‘sorta the father’ mean?” Liam asks.

_I’m not… it’s hard to explain and I need to be there with all of you when I tell you the truth._

“You’re either the father or not Harry,” Louis says firmly. Harry takes a while before answering, the boys wondering if the line went dead. “Are you there?”

_Yeah sorry. I’m sorry to sound mean but I can’t tell you because I think you’re going to go to the media and tell them I’m the father and she’ll get more media people to her door-_

“We get it,” Niall says, “you’re half the father, half not the father.”

“Even though according to science, you’re either 100% the father or not,” Zayn says. Louis shakes his head, saddened by the fact that the person he really, truly, deeply loves and everyday daydreams about him, has a child?!

_Louis?_

Louis shakes his head, swallowing down his saliva [and tears], not believing that Harry had a child! A child with a woman he didn’t even love. I mean, you have kids with the partner you love, don’t you? You plan the baby-making process [the fun part ;)], then building the nursery begins, after buying clothes [baby socks are really cute and tiny, Louis thought one time], a billion diapers, and after a million and one trips to every baby-related thing out there, the baby comes along. The one thing that you both built. Or adopted. Whichever.

_Is Louis still there guys?_

“Yeah, he’s just really upset,” Liam says.

_How upset?_

Zayn says, “You’ve just told him that you have a child and he… I think he wanted to have your baby.” The boys don’t know if Harry didn’t hear what Zayn just said but he changes the conversation.

_Please do this for me, that’s all I’m asking._

“Of course Harry,” Niall reassures him, “we’re even gonna go after breakfast. We’re going to go baby shopping, look for baby beds, diapers, baby oils, we’re going to take her to pregnancy lessons to teach you how to give birth until she gets sick of us!”

_Thank you!_

“Anytime and I think Perrie is going to like it because she’s been spending too much time with us,” Liam says.

_Listen Lou, I will explain everything when I get back! Anyway, we’re about to leave so I better go now._

“No, please,” Louis begs clutching the bedcover with his nails they turned white, “please stay. Please!”

_Okay Lou. What did you want to ask me though?_

“Nothing, I just want to hear your voice,” he confesses. Harry remains mum on the line, waiting for Louis to finally ask him. “Did you hear about me…?”

_That you’re gay?_

Louis nods, not saying anything. Niall shakes his head, slightly hitting him. “He can’t see you nod dipshit!”

“Oh, right,” Louis says, realizing it, “Yeah. I came out of the closet.”

_I saw the video, can’t believe you described my curls as chocolately and actually brought in a chocolate bar to describe it!_

“It’s true,” he whispers, “your curls also smell like chocolate.”

“No they don’t,” Liam disagrees.

_Yeah Lou, they don’t. They just smell like…curls, if curls have a smell._

“They do,” Louis says, his mood really happy. “They smell like Harry Edward Styles.” Niall rolls his eyes at the cheesiness, Liam shakes his head and Zayn stares at the phone.

_But it was beautiful._

“Really?” Louis asks, melting at how Harry pronounced ‘beautiful’

_Yeah. What happened to that chocolate?_

“Niall grabbed it from Louis after the video and ate it alone,” Zayn says.

“He wasn’t going to eat it!” Niall says, Harry laughing over the phone speakers.

“I was before you grabbed it and run away with it,” Louis chips in.

“Oh really!” Liam eyes Louis, smirking his lips. ‘”You told us that you will keep that chocolate for the rest of your life in memory of Harry.”

_What?_

“Uh, no.” Louis denies it, looking elsewhere apart from the boys.

_Is this true Lou?_

“Yes it is,” Niall answers when Louis remains in denial.

_Will I sound creepy if I watch it every week?_

“Louis watches yours every day, you’re fine Harry,” Liam smiles, Louis failing to shut Liam up by covering his mouth.

_It’s fine Liam. To be honest I would do the same if I didn’t move much._

“What do you mean move?”

_How did your family take it when you came out?_

Louis furrows his eyebrows at the sudden change of conversation but flows with it. “My mum was okay with it but got happier when she found out it was you I liked, apparently she already knew which I doubt. My step-father was really supportive, telling me that people may not like me anymore because they’re homophobic and I shouldn’t expect people to come at me with open arms. The fans obviously loved it, saying Larry is finally real.”

_I’ve noticed your tweets!_

Louis laughs and continues, “Though Larry and Elounor shippers got into a fight because you know, El and I broke up and I haven’t even bothered to talk to her but then I always remember she cheated on me with Liam” – Liam shifts uncomfortably on Louis’ bed – “and then I don’t care.”

_You’re so brave Louis._

“You’re the braver one among us. You managed to stand up to Modest! and actually run away and not get caught.”

Niall adds, “For more than a year.”

_I know, I sound so badass, don’t I? But I’m not brave Boobear. You’re the braver one, I came out and run away from it. I run away because I didn’t want people to judge me for being gay but you came out, rumors be damned, people be damned if they hated you because you’re bisexual, you still remained._

“Because you make me strong,” Louis says, whispering song lyrics that he wrote for the album.

“Do you hate me?”

_Yes, Zayn. I still do. And please don’t apologize because I’m not going to listen._

“Great Zayn,” Liam sighs, “you made him mad.”

“I just wanted to know,” Zayn says, standing up. “Bye Harry.”

“Where’re you going? I was joking Zee,” Liam asks. He ignores Liam’s question and shuts the door. “Well that was rude.”

_No seriously, now I have to go._

“Harry, are we close to knowing where you are?” Niall asks.

_Yes, you are but if anyone was to find me, it would probably be either Grimmy or Louis, not Tristan like most people think._

“Really, me?” Louis asks perplexed. How him? He had no clue where Harry was now – apart from hiking on a mountain – and he believes that Louis can find Harry? “Are you sure?”

_Please take care of Lana guys. Bye. And Lou?_

“Yeah?” he breaths, not moving an inch of his body. “Yes, Harry?”

_I love you. I really do and I’m so sorry for leaving you at the airport._

“I love you, I love you so much Harry,” Louis says, choking between his words, “I need you here with me and, ugh, I want to quote every single cheesy love song there is because they were written about you, they really were! I just want…”

_Don’t Lou…_

“I just want you to come back home,” he says, his last words stopped from crying into his bed covers. Harry too, can be heard crying, sniffing here and there. Liam looks and Niall whose gazing at poor Louis, feeling like crying too.

“We all do,” Liam says, “please come back Hazza.”

_I love you so much Louis, don’t ever forget that._

And he cuts the phone, Louis calling for Harry. He tells Niall to, ‘Call him back’ but it’s no use because it was an unknown number… or a payphone line so they can’t call it back. Adrenaline rushing through Louis’ veins, he jumps off bed, and runs out of his door, Liam and Niall barely keeping up with him downstairs.

 

**+**

 

“Hey Lou,” Perrie greets him when he passes her, “why are you running off to? And why are you still in your PJs?” He runs past her, and fiddles with something near the TV.

“This is the seventh or eighth time you’re doing this Louis, take a break,” Liam sighs. “And Zayn still isn’t out of his room?”

“Nope, he’s still upset,” Perrie says, ”what is he doing?”

“Harry called in the morning and then we talked but he had to go so now I have no idea what he’s doing,” Niall explains, watching Louis’ back, move up and down.

Perrie wonders. “Are you seriously tweeting Harry right now?”

“I need to tweet him, I haven’t tweeted in the entire day because he hasn’t called back,” Louis explains, logging in. He clicks on ‘Log In’ but Perrie stops him, grabbing the phone off him, unplugging the wire connected to the TV. “Give it back Perrie!”

“No!” she hisses. “You’re getting a little obsessive with the whereabouts of Harry, what he’s doing, what he’s eating, who he’s messing with, who he’s fvcking on the airplane-”

“Ouch!” Liam coughs. Louis’ face fell when Perrie suggests that Harry has been having sex on the regular. I mean, he completely refuses to have sex with Niall because he’s waiting for Harry yet Harry doesn’t even bother to save himself for _him_? So much for waiting!

“I’m not apologizing for what I’ve said,” Perrie tells him, “you need a reality check and I’m the one to give it to you because your little friends over here are too cowardly. You’re going downhill Louis, you’re also becoming very violent and heartless. Look what you did to Zayn? You dragged a broken bottle over his arm without battering an eyelid and that didn’t make you stop to think that maybe, just maybe, you’re psychotic? And then Eleanor? Poor El, you haven’t even bothered to talk to her. She’s bawling every single day because of you, she doesn’t even go to her Uni classes anymore and Max, her friend, doesn’t know what to do anymore. All you do is spend time with Danielle, telling her all your problems instead of solving your problems.”

“I am solving my problems,” Louis says, his anger boiling, “And you don’t tell me what to do with my life! I dumped Eleanor after she cheated on my with my best friend and part of the process of breaking up with people is not talking to them! And Zayn deserved it.”

Niall whispers to Liam, “Do you feel like the third wheel here?”

“100% yeah,” he answers back.

“Now listen to me,” Perrie continues, “you’re going to go upstairs and take a bath, then come down, eat something, tweet Harry and then go to bed, got it?”

Louis nods not trusting his voice anymore. Last time he talked back when someone made him mad, he cut them with glass and that didn’t go down so well. He goes upstairs, Perrie walking to the kitchen and there still is no sign of Zayn.

“So…” Niall says, making fart noises with his lips.

“What are you doing?” Liam asks, his fingers lingering on Niall’s arm. Niall immediately feels like he can’t breathe because with little touches from Liam just sends electric shock through his body… the good ones obviously. Like this one time, Niall and the lads were watching something on BluRay, and out of the blue, Liam threaded his fingers with his and let it rest on his thigh!! _Breathe breathe_ , Niall told himself repeatedly that night. Thank goodness it was dark and all so nobody saw them together but who cares! They held hands the entire time and in bed?! They even went to second base, Niall fantasizes.

“Uh…nothing,” Niall says, barely breathing.

“Do you guys want pizza take out or Chinese?” Perrie asks, coming out from the kitchen. She stops seeing Liam holding on Niall by his waist, Niall’s arms wrapped around his shoulders. “Um, you guys look comfy together… like really together.”

Liam and Niall unwrap themselves from each other, color on both of their cheeks. “Uh,” Niall wants to say something but he couldn’t.

“Are you guys together?” Perrie wonders, noticing the color on Liam’s cheek and shifting on his feet, Niall’s eyes darting everywhere around the room but not her, Liam’s fingers brushing accidentally on Niall’s… but now that she sees it, it doesn’t look like an accident. “How together are you?” she wonders.

“Um,” Liam begins, gazing at Niall. “We…. well, I don’t know what I am but I’m comfortable kissing boys.” Perrie gasps. “And Niall is bisexual.” Perrie gasps some more.

“How do you know you’re bisexual?” she asks, after a moment of silence for everything to sink in.

“I… I was kissing… How do I say this without sounding like an idiot,” Niall says in a confused manner, “Me and Louis used to kiss, well we still do, to find out if he’s really gay. And then I discovered that I’m bisexual which explains the reason why I used to like Liam more than just a friend.”

“You kiss Louis because you want to make him gay?”

“No, to prove he is gay!”

“Because he wasn’t gay when he kissed Harry at the airport, tongue and all?”

Liam states, “She makes sense.”

“I do, don’t I?” Perrie smirks.

“Kissing guys to make sure they’re gay will never sound right,” Niall heaves in defeat.

“So you are gay?” Zayn asks, stepping on the last step.


	14. (teenage niam)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zayn comes to terms with the new (gay) shocks in his life.

**//**

_Let's go all the way tonight, no regrets, just love. We can dance, until we die, You and I, will be young forever **~ Katy Perry**_

**\\\**

** **

 

THE three of them turn around to see Zayn with puffy, sleepy eyes, standing on the bottom of the stairs. When did he get there? Niam’s hearts, on the other hand, were beating quickly that it felt like anytime their hearts would shoot out of their bodies and continue beating on the carpet floor.

“Baba, what are you doing up?” Perrie asks, walking to her fiancé. She plants a huge kiss on his lips. “You should be sleeping, the doctors said you need to be resting or your arms won’t heal quickly.”

“I’ve been sleeping the entire day, honey,” Zayn coos, “and plus I was thirsty and you were shouting pretty loud.”

“Oh, you heard that,” Perrie laughs blushing, “you weren’t meant to.”

“I don’t think I was meant to hear about Liam and Niall either,” Zayn points out. “So are you guys like… together?”

“Yes,” Perrie says.

“Um no, not, uh-”

“Yes,” Liam says, stopping Niall. “Yes we are. But sort of on the down low.”

“Great, I’m around gay people!” Zayn sighs. “Again!”

“C’mon Baba, they’re your friends,” Perrie says to him, holding his cheekbones.

“And?” Zayn questions. “Should I change my views about gays because they’re my friends?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying.” Perrie shakes her head, grazing her thumb against his glass jawline.

“Isn’t it?” Niall asks. Perrie turns around and glares at him. “What are you looking at?”

Perrie huffs and says, “You may be uncomfortable around gay people, understandable coming from you, but these people are different, they’re actually people you care about and love and that shouldn’t change because they’re suddenly gay.”

“We’re not suddenly gay,” Niall says, “I knew I was.”

“I was talking about Liam,” Perrie says, “Now that this whole thing is over,” – Zayn glares at her – “or sort of over, I think I’ll order Indian because I’m too tired to cook for four boys for the fourth time this week!”

“I need to go… out for a smoke,” Zayn says, walking past Niam holding hands, and onto the balcony.

“Don’t worry about him, he’ll come around,” Perrie says as the doorbell rings, “I mean, he’s fine with Louis being gay.”

“In case you forgot, he wasn’t fine with Harry being gay,” Niall says. Liam wraps his arm around his body, planting a kiss on his blond hair. “It’ll be fine,” he tells him.

She opens the door to a very pregnant, black-haired, green-eyed girl. “Lana!” Perrie hugs her tightly, careful not to hurt her baby bump. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t come pick you up, it’s like living with four little four-year olds around here!”

“No, it’s fine Perrie. I understand and I can’t imagine doing all of this alone,” Lana says.

“Well Gemma and I switch roles, so today is when I take care of the boys and now you, thanks to worry wart Harry.”

“I’m so sorry for all of this. I swear I didn’t ask for any of it,” Lana says, embarrassed by Harry’s kindness.

“That’s normal for Harry,” Liam says, “you’ll get used to it after a while.”

“What’s it like being pregnant?” Perrie asks.

“Oh terrible really,” Lana sighs, “If I knew I would honestly never have had sex, or made sure we used a condom! But it’s terrible. I’ve grown so fat, I can’t walk in heels anymore, my ankles are so swollen I’m worried they might break with the weight of my body, my boobs hurt every two seconds, my singing career is literally at a standstill and I was shooting my music video for _West Coast_ but my producers said I should wait until I give birth.”

“I think you’ll wait a little longer than that pumpkin,” Perrie says, “you’ll have to take care of the baby.”

“Oh Harry will do most of the taking care of,” Lana says, “I can feel him doing it.”

“So you said your boobs grow bigger?” Niall asks, “how bigger?”

“Niall!” Perrie hisses.

Lana straightens her back, popping out her chest. “Look for yourself! They’re humongous! I can’t even cup one in my hand anymore because they’re massive.”

“Oh that’s huge, very huge,” Niall says, staring hard at Lana’s boobs, “too bad Harry isn’t here to look at them.”

“Niall!” Perrie hisses louder.

Lana defends him, “He’s gay Perrie, he wouldn’t care about boobs.”

Niall exhales loudly at Perrie. “What?”

“You’re staring at Lana’s boobs!” Perrie points it out at him.

“No, I was just seeing how big they’ve gotten.” Niall winks at Lana, Liam rolling his eyes. “Aren’t you uncomfortable?” Perrie asks Lana. She shakes her head. “No, Niall is actually the sweetest guy. Most of them touch my boobs, pretend to bump into me. Do you one guy stuffed his face into my cleavage saying, ‘I found my breast friends.’”

Niall laughs. “That’s hilarious.”

“Yeah, funny,” Liam drones.

“But look at me complaining, how’ve you guys been? I thought it was only that Harry that disappeared, I can’t seem to see Louis or Zayn,” Lana says, shifting on the couch. “I can’t seem to sit comfortably anymore either.”

“Louis is showering and Zayn is out smoking,” Niall says. “Are your boobs hurting?”

“Yeah-” Lana begins but Perrie interrupts her, hearing enough about Lana’s boobs! And pretty sure she knew so did Liam. “I don’t think I’m ever going to have kids. I’ve been babysitting these four lads, cooking for them, laundry, making sure they get the sun once in a day, not forgetting to tell them to say hallo to Harry though with Louis it’s more like stop saying hallo to him. I literally have to be in the same room when Zayn, Louis or Liam are together because historically, it’s not been so great.”

“Oh yeah, it was on the news about Zayn’s arm, did a robber come into the house?”

“No… I mean, yes, it was some creepy robber who wanted-”

“I know you’re lying Perrie, it’s me, you can tell me anything,” Lana says.

“Louis stabbed him near his heart,” Niall says. Liam crosses his hands over his chest, his lips tightly closed. “It was terrible the way he dragged a bottle over his skin-”

“Niall!” Perrie hisses. The doorbell rings, ‘I hope that’s food’, and walks to the door. She comes back, Niall chatting up Lana about her boobs and Liam controlling his anger, and place the bags on the table. “This is for you guys.” She hands a bag to Liam, ‘and you eat it in your room’ and takes out her food from the bag.

“Why are we leaving?”

“Because Lana and I are spending a girls’ night and since I can’t leave the house because who knows who will murder my little Baba,” Perrie says. “Besides, I’m waiting for Zayn to come from smoking and Louis to come down.”

“Thanks for the food and see you Lana,” Niall says, and follows Liam upstairs. He opens the bag rapidly, curry spice filling the room. “Out of all the foods I’ve eaten, Indian is my third favorite after Nandos and Thai.”

“Hmm,” Liam mums, grabbing a plastic spoon from inside the bag and digging in.

“But then I also like Italian though I guess pizza is now more international food rather than solely Italian. But since I’m African, I do like some African dishes, especially Biryani, you should really try it Liam.”

“Mmhm.”

“Though you said you were allergic to rice so I guess you’d never know how good it is. I should take you to this restaurant down the street from here,” Niall continues speaking, oblivious to Liam’s silence. Liam digs into his food harder and harder each time, counting to 30 as he chews on his food, swallowing and repeating, in the meantime, Niall talking in a lively manner about the different dishes across the world. “How could I forget Chinese food? Chinese is literally the best, a bit mainstream but who doesn’t like Chinese?”

“Mmhm,” Liam says.

“Why are you being a silent douchebag right now?”

“Maybe because Perrie knows we’re together, Zayn the homophobic Christian knows and look what he did to Harry and oh, don’t forget you flirting with Lana about her boobs.”

“You’re jealous because I’m flirting with Lana?” Niall asks. Liam stabs his food with his plastic fork, munching on his food, 21, 22, 23, 24, _keep counting_ , Liam tells himself, 30 and he swallows. “Tell me Liam, are you jealous?”

“No I’m not jealous that you’re talking about boobs and how big they are and how you wish you could cup it into your hand, no not jealous at all because I’m just the guy you’re making out it on the down low.”

“I’m bisexual I’m pretty sure I can talk and admire boobs because that’s what bisexuals do!”

“Not when you’re in a relationship with me no you’re not!”

Niall stares, blinking several times at Liam. He watches Liam stabbing his food not putting anything in his mouth. He stands up and walks to the bathroom, locking it with a key. _What?_ Niall wonders. _What just happened?_

He walks to the bathroom and tries to turn the knob. “I’ve just locked it Ni!” Liam says behind the door, sighing because airhead.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Liam, I don’t understand,” Niall says sliding down the bathroom door, “I was just talking about Lana’s boobs but I didn’t mean anything by it. I was… uh, just looking at them I guess. I didn’t think it would bother you because we’re not really in…uh, we’re not dating as such so I thought-”

“So you thought you could talk about boobs all the time when I was there? You might have done it when I’m not there so then I would feign ignorance.”

“No, of course I didn’t do it on purpose, Li. I thought it was just harmless fun to be honest.”

Liam sighs and unlocks the door, Niall almost falling backwards to his feet. He looks up at Liam, puppy eyes and all, Liam melting a little [okay, a lot] inside. “I know it’s dumb,” Liam begins, twiddling with his fingers, “but I thought you and I were, I don’t know, together _together_. Like more than make out buddies and when you started admiring Lana’s boob,” – Niall’s face falls – “I felt bad, I felt cheap and unwanted and that you probably didn’t like me anymore, that you were sick of boys so you were now into girls as well-”

“I’m still into dudes,” Niall says cupping his hands into Liam’s, “I’m still into you.”

“I would prefer if it were my boobs you were staring, gaping, drooling and admiring at not Lana’s.”

“I promise from now on I’ll look at your beautiful boobs…”

Liam laughs at what Niall’s just said, Niall joining in. “That’s awkward.”

“It probably is,” Niall agrees, “also if it’s a relationship you want, then it’s a relationship that you will get.”

“Are you and Louis-”

“No,” Niall shakes his head, “We sort of stopped.”

Liam asks his face lighting up, “So we’re like together?”

“As together as you want.”

“But,” Liam says biting his bottom lip, “I can’t come out in public… I don’t think I’m ready.”

“Me neither, I’m not brave like Louis.”

“You’re brave enough for me,” Liam says, closing the gap between their lips. He threw his arms around his neck, crushing their lips together even more, a groan coming from the back of Niall’s throat. “Sh!t you’re so bloody hot!”

“So are you,” Niall gushes, walking backwards to the bed, Liam wriggling out of his shirt. Niall bumps his feet on the bed, flopping his body on the bed. His eyes scan through his body to his eyes, Liam watching him with eyes full of lust. He feels the bed going down, Liam playing with the hem of his shirt. He nods silently to him, pulling off his shirt with a sweep. Liam hovers above him, taking in all of Niall.

“You’re absolute stunning,” Liam breaths. Ever so gently he places his lips to Niall’s, his arms bucking Niall down who was rubbing his crotch against Liam’s. _Ugh_. They continue kissing passionately, with speed, rolling around, and enough exotica. Niall cleverly massages the back of Liam’s, _slowly_ , brushing his tongue on the bottom of Liam’s red, plump lips. He grants entrance, Niall already dominating. Colliding arms, later, running up and down their bodies, Niall scratches Liam’s back, his throbbing co*ck becoming a _breathless_ problem.

Nothing helps anymore, when Liam leaves his red lips, and makes his way down his neck. _Habba habba_. He bites on the fleshy skin, sucking on it, leaving a small trail of saliva but that’s didn’t matter, Niall needs a _release_.

“Liam,” he gushes, holding tightly onto Liam’s hair _for dear life_.

Liam straddles Niall, grinning like a kid. “Those lovebites look good on your pale skin.”

“I don’t have…” he says, stopping for air when Liam straddles him. “Pale skin.” He raises his hands to Liam’s chest, scratching it with blunt nails. “Now.” He unbuttons his pants, pulling them down, along with his.

“Spongebob Square pants?” Liam questions seeing Niall’s boxers pumped in a tent.

“They’re cool, stop hating,” Niall says, swinging his hips on the bed. Bad idea because crotch damn issues.

Liam rips off them Spongebob boxers with his teeth as he says, “Let’s get these boxers off gorgeous.” He waves them in the air, dumping them next to his. Niam kiss one more time, Liam sticking his tongue down Niall’s throat because _he’s just so irresistible_.

“Um,” Niall breaks the kiss, Liam looking worried at Niall. “What’s wrong?” he asks. “Is it me?”

“It’s uh-”

“I’ll be careful with you,” Liam soothes, kissing away the fears on his neck and chest.

“It’s not that, it’s, um, I’m a virgin…istic tonight about our sex tonight-”

“You’re a virgin?” Liam asks, super, duper surprised. Niall nods, his arms around Liam’s neck.

Yes, Niall Horan, the Niall Horan, is a virgin. If Mr X had posted the diary entry about Niall then the entire world would have known that he didn’t lose his virginity to some Irish girl like everyone knew. It’s also not that he was saving himself like he was telling the world that he believes in ‘sex after marriage’. No! To say the truth, he just didn’t meet anyone. Until Liam.

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Liam says, stroking his jawline, “I think that’s really special, for you to wait…”

“I wasn’t waiting, I just didn’t meet anyone who was worth it,” Niall says gazing deeply into his eyes. He pulls himself off the bed to brush his lips against his.

“And you think it’s me?”

“Yes, I do.”

Liam glees at this and promises him, “I’m going to make your first time a good time, gorgeous.”

And later on the bed, it was a good time, between their bodies and below.


	15. (MaRcH mAdNeSs)

**//**

> _I don’t why god would introduce me to you to take you away so fast._

**\\\**

** **

MARCH 4th!

March 4th had finally reached. After Harry had left Macau, Scotland Yard tracked Harry’s movements ahead of time, and they pegged Australia and they were right – Harry a day later tweeted he was going to Aussie next. Team Louis took the next available flight to Australia, which was, weird enough, two days later, but who cares, they were finally going to see Harry.

“I’m so excited!” Louis gushed, stuffing his clothes into his small red suitcase. “This is it. This is finally the moment I get to see him, it’s been nearly a year and a half!”

“We all miss him buddy,” Liam patted his back. “We all do.”

“I can’t wait to see how tall he’s become,” Zayn said, packing as well.

“He’s going to be taller than Liam, isn’t he?” Niall asked, looking at the tip of Liam’s head. Or his lips.

Team King were not left behind, they too took the next flight, arriving a day before Team Louis landed at which King rubbed it in his face, as usual.

“Hey King!” Niall greeted, bro-fisting him.

“Like always, we’re always one step ahead of you guys,” King said when Team Louis happened to be in the same hotel.

“Great, same hotel as you guys?” Louis sighed. “Who the hell booked this hotel anyway?”

“You did,” Liam said, walking past him and to the elevator.

“Good luck meeting Harry,” King chuckled. “But as usual, you just seem to be following us.”

“Leave him alone,” Zayn said, dragging Louis away.

“We’ll see about that,” Gemma said, winking at Nick.

“To whoever wins,” Nick stated.

Fans too were not going to be left behind, certainly not! They heard the news, and of course the tweets from the boys, and made way to the airport. They completely filled it to the brim that practically brought the capital city to a standstill because everyone had gone to the airport, yes everyone! Along with the hundreds of Australian police too, who were also waiting for Harry to land… and arrest him. Harry had an INTERNATIONAL ARREST declared by Scotland Yard. So if Harry walked through the airport, he would go straight to jail.

This is what Zayn had been explaining to the lads but because of being Mr X, he didn’t have much credibility.

“Don’t you think there’s something fishy with this whole thing?” Zayn asked, shutting the door to the car and Perrie driving.

“This again?” Liam sighed, laying his head on Niall’s shoulders.

“Yes, this again. Think about it. In the note we saw in South Africa, Harry said if he ever came back he would be arrested, he would end up in jail.”

“So?” Gemma asked.

“He tweeted he’s going to Australia, the police will be waiting for him, Scotland Yard will be there too, he literally cannot escape arrest. If he’s arrested, he’ll go to jail for a really long time so we might not even see him.”

“So do you think he’s going to Australia even?” Liam questioned, thinking about what Zayn just said.

“I think he is,” Niall said. “But it’s confusing cause Zayn makes sense too.”

“So which is it: is Harry going to Australia or not?” Louis questioned. No one answered him. “I think he’s going to Aussie and he wouldn’t lie about that. I know he wouldn’t.”

“You’re in love with him so it doesn’t count,” Niall said.

“I agree with Louis,” Gemma said, “but I think Zayn is being in denial about Harry coming back and he has to face him about Mr X.”

Zayn groaned and looked outside the car window. Perrie gazed at her fiancé through the corner of her eye and reached out to grab onto his hand. He squeezed it, fiddling with the engagement ring, his face not moving an inch. How long would his past mistakes follow him?

However, little did the boys know, Harry wouldn’t go to Australia. But Harry didn’t lie either, he did go to Australia.

The flight from Hong Kong was landing in 2 minutes, and all sorts of feelings and emotions were rising quickly. The boys were anxious, Australians were excited, Modest! and the team were overwhelmed by everything, Team King were overjoyed, the media were already recording the events, heck even the news were there: CNN, BBC, AUSSIE TODAY, and others you wonder where they came from, the fans were excited and ecstatic beyond words, Scotland Yard were, well, you know how detectives are! Men in black, holding guns and whatnot, run towards the plane, beginning the operation on capturing Harry.

Louis’ face was plastered to the window at the waiting area, holding his card written LARRY STYLINSON on it, with love and hearts drawn over it, his face with one feeling: anxiousness. This was the moment he was finally seeing Harry after too long, he imagined people walking out of the plane and that Harry would probably one of them walking through the plaque tunnel from the plane right now.

“Calm down Louis,” Liam said, noticing Louis pace up and down, “It’s Harry not Queen Elizabeth or whoever!”

“Exactly, it’s Harry.”

“Oh somebody help this boy,” Niall said. He walked over to where Zayn was, taking pictures with the fans and signing autographs.

One by one, people walked through the small gate, Louis’ eyes [and literally the airport’s eyes] were glued to where the travelers were walking through. One by one, they walked out, surprised by the huge amount of people at the Arrivals area of the airport, the flashing cameras, lights and microphones all around. But it didn’t matter, these people were here for Harry, as some of them knew. One by one, the people became fewer and fewer, and soon enough, no one else was walking through the door.

There was no Harry.

“What’s happening?” Louis questioned, still in a denial state. “Where is he?”

“He’s coming Louis,” Liam said.

“Maybe he was on a different flight,” Gemma said, “Maybe he’s coming with a night flight.”

“Gemma is sorta right,” Zayn said. The lads and Gemma turned to him, scrolling through on his Blackberry, “Harry isn’t coming to Australia.”

“But he tweeted.”

“He’s in Macdonald Island.”

Nick asked, Team King having joined them. “Where is that?”

“Technically, MacDonald Island is part of Australia but it’s an island several kilometers West of Australia. It’s actually closer to Antarctica than Australia,” Zayn explained. “He’s just tweeted about the place saying there isn’t McDonald's there with an Instagram picture of himself.”

“Just like Harry,” Conor said.

“So technically you were right,” Niall stated about Zayn.

“Don’t you want the honor of saying ‘I told you so’?” Liam asked Zayn, winking at him.

“No,” Zayn shook his head, glancing at Louis who was curled on the floor, silently crying, the media and fans and everyone at the airport looking at him. “We need to be here for Louis not celebrate on me being right.”

“He has a point,” Liam said, “This is what we do. King, Nick, me and Zayn are going to distract everyone, Niall, Gemma and Conor should go comfort Louis. Let’ go.”

“He’s not here,” Louis cried to Niall who held him close, still on the floor.

“Lou, sweetheart, listen,” Gemma sat on the floor near Niall, Conor standing behind him, “Harry didn’t actually lie because he is in Australia, we just assumed he was coming down to Sidney, right? But listen to me, I’m going to be harsh and say something you don’t want to hear, okay?”

Louis didn’t say anything, silently crying to himself, holding tightly to Niall’s shirt. He was soaking his shirt with tears but Niall didn’t mind, he understood his cries… because to be honest, he also wanted to see Harry walk through those doors. To run up to him with the lads and hug him tightly [and lightly punch him for leaving]

“Harry is going to come when he feels like coming, okay? And right now I don’t think he’s ready to come. Don’t you get why he left? He was scared of people judging him for being gay, for being different than he was and sorry to be mean, you four gave him enough reason to hate himself to the extent he called himself a monster,” she began, “but even I’m too blame because I called him a monster when I shouldn’t have. But not once did I hate him for being gay but you did every single day and you rubbed it in his face that you were happy with Eleanor and Larry was pure bullshit. He dated girls for you, to forget you, to prove to himself that he was going to get over you but he had to always come home to see you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Louis’ sobs stopped, Gemma’s words hitting close to home. “Harry was very happy when he was with me. I could tell.”

“Yes but in his head you were always there. You never left his mind, and it was chocking him. You were suffocating him and if that wasn’t enough, you were never around when he was home.”

“I was!” Louis defends himself, propping himself off Niall. A few Directioners, turned their attention to Louis. “I was always home but he was out partying with King, Ed and you, Conor!”

“And Grimmy,” Conor added. Louis rolled his eyes.

“This is what I’m talking about. You think Harry was never there? He was but you just didn’t see it. He was there when you went out with Eleanor for the 9th time that week, he was there when you went to Manchester practically every weekend, he was there when you went to see Stan, he was there when you ditched him to go hang with the lads, heck, he was even there in the next room when you played FIFA all night.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because he called me that night,” Gemma answered. “But seriously Louis? You make me so mad!” Gemma gritted through her teeth, slamming her knuckles on the ground. Niall and Conor’s brows shot up, surprised by her sudden anger. “You seriously do. You keep blaming Zayn for everything that’s been going wrong for the past a year and a half but no, it’s not Zayn’s fault, it’s your fault. All Zayn did was make Harry come out but you, oh, you did put the wood together, sprinkled oil on it and handed Zayn the lit match,” she said, raw anger seething, “you burnt him alive without even noticing it. And finally you notice, when the damn fire you lit is burning him.”

“Calm down Gemma,” Conor said, “Louis’ heard this a thousand times.”

“Apparently not,” Louis rolled his eyes, his lips in a tight line, “apparently I need to be reminded that it’s my fault that Harry left, that One Direction is practically non-existent, that the tour is cancelled, that the fucking police are looking for him-”

Gemma stabbed her finger on Louis’ chest, both of them standing already. “You let him go. You could’ve stopped him but you didn’t. You should’ve listened to Zayn when he told you Harry wouldn’t be here and it’s funny how history repeats itself because happening again. You’re not listening Louis, you’re not observing anything anymore! This is why you couldn’t tell that your own best friend fucked your fucking girlfriend! Your famewhore girlfriend who-”

“Enough!” Louis shouted at her.

“Are you defending Eleanor now?” Conor questioned.

“Do you think I don’t know how it feels like? How it feel like when the entire fucking world blames you for letting the most amazing, quirky, flawless boy to travel around the world? Do you know what it feels like when we find a lead on where Harry is and when we get there he’s not to be found?”

“Do you?” Gemma sarcastically asked when Louis stopped to catch his breath.

“No, you don’t! And what’s worse? I feel like he doesn’t want to be found, I feel like all we’re doing right now is a waste of time!” Louis said, half the airport gasping, “Yeah I just said that so what? It’s been almost two years since Harry left and in those two years, I have changed and I have observed and I have listened, Gemma. I am becoming a better person for Harry, okay? But you too could’ve saved your own fucking brother. You called him a monster for crying out loud-”

“You said gays were faggots!”

“They are!”

Niall coughed. “Uhh, Lou you’re gay.”

“You know what I meant.” Louis said and added, “I’m bisexual anyway.”

“Because that’s what’s important now correcting your sexuality. “ Conor rolled his eyes, heaving loudly. It was like being around children.

“This is why Harry left. This is the perfect example,” Gemma cried hysterically, “of why Harry is touring the world. He run away from all this homophobic behavior.”

“I’m bisexual so how can I be homophobic,” Louis said, “and I’m sorry if I told him that I just didn’t know. I swear if I knew I would’ve done things differently. I would have listened to him telling me that Eleanor was using me for my fame and money, maybe once in the hundredth time he told me I should’ve listened, but I didn’t-”

“You guys need to stop,” Zayn whispered harshly, “the entire airport is listening to both of you and recording everything you’re saying.”

“We’re here because of you dumbass!” Louis hissed, placing his hands on his chest and pushing him backwards. “You’re the reason Harry is going all around the world,” – he pushed him some more– “playing games with us,” – he pushed him harder again – “lying to us where he is. You’re the reason we’re here and this is all your fault!”

“This is your fault too dipsh!t,” Zayn cries at Louis. “You’re the dumb idiot who couldn’t tell his own best friend was gay and was in love with him! You couldn’t notice that the poor boy was on drugs, he was popping pills all the time but I’m sure you thought they were Tic Tacs didn’t you? You retard!”

Conor and Niall chuckled at Zayn’s imagery and Gemma added, “Didn’t you think it was strange why Harry suddenly spent a lot of time with King, Grimmy, Conor and Ed? Did it ever click to you that maybe, just maybe, the four of you were not that interesting?”

“Ouch,” Niall said, looking down.

“Yes it did and it’s all Nick’s fault,” Louis said.

“No it’s not. If someone spends a lot of time away from you it means you are the problem. And if they take a lot of drugs around you, you’re the problem and if they’re always drunk around you, trust me, they either don’t like you or you give them a lot of built up anger,” Gemma said.

“But you knew he was doing drugs and didn’t do anything?” Louis said, shouting at Zayn.

“I found out when it was too late and I don’t even live with him!”

Louis opened his mouth and then shut it two seconds later, words failing him. “So this is my fault? It’s my fault Harry left? It doesn’t make sense he loves me why would he leave me?” His voice rose with every question he asked.

“It’s because he loves you that he left,” Conor said.

“But he left which means he doesn’t love me anymore.”

“You’re a fucking idiot!” Gemma cursed him, her hands flapping at him but her body was halted by Zayn. “Let me go Zayn.”

“No, I’ve tried hitting Louis and look what happened to me.”

Conor explained to Louis: “What Gemma is trying to say is that yes, you’re an idiot for not seeing that Harry still loves you, I mean he wrote you a sweet note in South Africa, he took you to see an awesome art painting in Macau and bought it specially for you, he gave you a clue on how to find him-”

“But-”

But before Conor could explain some more, and the cameras continue rolling, the airport screens started zipping and zapping as if they were hacked. Voices through the intercom were heard “We’re being hacked!” but nobody cared for they waited to see what it was.

“It’s Harry,” Niall smiled. The name Harry popped on the screen and a small message followed:

 

**_I never lied to you, Boobear. I never would forgive myself if I did._ **

 

Below the message was a tan, fedora-wearing picture of himself, doing a duck face with his rosy, cheeky lips.

“Like I was saying, he loves you,” Conor said.

“I guess he does,” Louis reeled, all anger towards Gemma and Zayn vanishing. And before they all knew it, the screen went back to showing the departure and arrival of flights.

And none of them included any that Harry was on.


	16. (bun)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry makes it in time for the birth.

**//**

> _Who's gonna kiss my lipstick lips? Who's gonna hold me tight? I got a bun in the oven, but I still need lovin'._ ~ **_Eleni Mandell_**

**\\\**

**_ _ **

**_RH-ARRY-INO_ ** _@HarryIsAwesome 4 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles RYTHM IS A HAD WORD TO SPELL_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 4 hours ago  
@HarryIsAwesome Rhythm is a hard word, don’t feel bad you can’t spell it_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 3 hours ago  
Going into labor… the PAAAAIN!!! :@_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 3 hours ago  
@lanadelrayy hang in there love, just remember to push!_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 3 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles Oh really? I wasn’t planning on doing that at all!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 3 hours ago  
@lanadelrayy Ooooh this baby is making you bitchy -_-_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 3 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles GO AWAY!!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 3 hours ago  
@lanadelrayy Did I mention hormonal and moody? Are you on your periods?_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 3 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles Sometimes you can be an arse Harry!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 3 hours ago  
@lanadelrayy You love my arse though_

**_Lana Del Ray_ ** _@lanadelrayy 3 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles Yes I do :)… and your lame jokes._

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles You fucktard! We all came to meet you at the airport but you weren’t there!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 hours ago  
@JUSTKING To be honest, that was funny… and I didn’t lie._

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles @JUSTKING Damn you man! we waited and waited but you were a no show!_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 2 hours ago  
“@NiallOfficial: @Harry_Styles @JUSTKING Damn you man! we waited and waited but you were a no show!” TRUER WORRRDS HAVE NEVER BEEN SPOKKKEN!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 hours ago  
@JUSTKING @NiallOfficial @Real_Liam_Payne You were just at the wrong airport._

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles You could’ve told us._

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 hours ago  
@Real_Liam_Payne Didn’t you see my message to Louis?_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles @Real_Liam_Payne we did! and he was really angry at you! and sad as well!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 hours ago  
@NiallOfficial sad? Was he crying? I thought it was a cute message.#DontCryLou_

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles @NiallOfficial HE CRIED BEFORE SEEING THE MESSAGE… OH DON’T FORGET FIGHTING WITH YOUR SISTER  & ZAYN TOO._

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 hours ago  
@JUSTKING Gemma? Louis fought with Gemma? Why?_

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 2 hours ago  
@Harry_Styles WHAT DO YOU THINK?_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 1 hour ago  
@Harry_Styles You’ve missed a lot since you left! We’ve all changed, especially your beloved Louis._

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 1 hour ago  
“@NiallOfficial: @Harry_Styles You’ve missed a lot since you left! We’ve all changed, especially your beloved Louis.” especially himmm_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 hour ago  
@Real_Liam_Payne @NiallOfficial Where is he? He usually is online when I am._

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 1 hour ago  
@Harry_Styles He’s hanging out with Danielle! Where’re you off to now!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 hour ago  
@NiallOfficial If I told you, you would go there and probably not find me_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 1 hour ago  
@Harry_Styles Tell us anyway._

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 hour ago  
@NiallOfficial I don’t want Louis to worry too much._

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 55 min ago  
@NiallOfficial @Harry_Styles It’ a little too late for that Harryyy!! _

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 54 min ago  
@Real_Liam_Payne I’m going to Japan_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 52 min ago  
@Harry_Styles SERIOULSLLY? WHYY?_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 50 min ago  
@Real_Liam_Payne Because they’re awesome… and I love their green tea and sushi bars!!_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 48 min ago  
@Harry_Styles AAAAAAAAAAAAUHGGGGGGGGGGGGG nooooooo_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 47 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Real_Liam_Payne YES! YES!! YES! YES! You owe me and @JUSTKING 50 pounds haha!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 47 min ago  
@NiallOfficial What’s going on?_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 45 min ago  
@Harry_Styles King and I bet that your next country would be Japan! and Liam thought it was Fiji!_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 43 min ago  
@NiallOfficial @Harry_Styles Whyyyy didn’t you go to FIJI!!?!?!??!?!?!_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 42 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @Real_Liam_Payne hahahhahahha!!!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 40 min ago  
@Harry_Styles @NiallOfficial @Real_Liam_Payne Fiji would also have been my guesstoo_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 35 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson LOUIS! :D_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 34 min ago  
@Harry_Styles HARRY ! xD_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 31 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson I miss you_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 30 min ago  
@Harry_Styles I got into a stupid fight with your sister and Zayn_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 25 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson So Niall told me… because of me….. :(_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 24 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Yes. I was mad but I cooled off. I really miss you so much._

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 22 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson I do too but please don’t get sad about me. I’m coming home soon #DontCryLou_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 20 min ago  
@Harry_Styles YOU ARE?! WHEN!_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 20 min ago  
@Harry_Styles GO AWAY NIALL, YOU COCKBLOCKER !_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 17 min ago  
@Harry_Styles He’s my friend too! and you guys weren’t flirting anyhow!!! So when Harry! #Larryishappening!_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 15 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Really soon now._

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 14 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Tomorrow? #larryISREAL_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 7 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Tomorrow is tomorrow, soon is in the future. Near future, don’t worry._

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 6 min ago  
@Harry_Styles :( For a year?_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 4 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Goodness no, that’s too long. It’s 2AM here Lou, gotta go sleep. I have an early flight._

**_Raghdad_ ** _@StylesMyFace 4 min ago  
@Harry_Styles Goodnight HARRY!!! WE ALL MISS YOUUUU #larryisHAPPENING_

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 3 min ago  
“@StylesMyFace: Goodnight HARRY!!! WE ALL MISS YOUUUU” we all do!! :’(_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 2 min ago  
@StylesMyFace Goodnight babe .xx H_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 min ago  
@Louis_Tomlinson Promise me from now on you won’t miss me, fight with people or try to kill Zayn? Because not much longer until I hold you in my arms._

**_Louis Tomlinson_ ** _@Louis_Tomlinson 1 min ago  
@Harry_Styles If you promise to come back in the next 2 weeks?_

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 30 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson YES, please!! We miss you_

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 20 sec ago  
@NiallOfficial You up for another bet with Liam?_

**_Liam Payne_ ** _@Real_Liam_Payne 15 sec ago  
@NiallOfficial @JUSTKING It’s on ! 100 pounds that he won’t be back by two weeks._

**_JUST KING HOE_ ** _@JUSTKING 10 sec ago  
@NiallOfficial Then we say he’ll be back before 2 weeks are over._

**_Niall Horan_ ** _@NiallOfficial 6 sec ago  
“@JUSTKING: @NiallOfficial Then we say he’ll be back before 2 weeks are over.” Agreed! 100 pounds!_

**_Nick Grimshaw_ ** _@grimmers 3 sec ago  
@Harry_Styles @NiallOfficial I agree with Louis, two weeks tops ;)_

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles now  
@Louis_Tomlinson Deal! Goodnight Boobear._

AND for the second round, just like Australia, Japan was crowded to the brim, with everybody anxiously waiting for Harry that the Geologists said the country sank by 2 inches.

 

Meanwhile in the silent corridors, deep in the heart of London, at the London National Hospital, a curly haired boy with green eyes and brown boots topped with a bandana around his curls, walks down the corridor, fluorescent lights illuminating his path to Room 59748. He leans against the door frame, eyes wandering to the lady on the bed writhing in labor pains, her screams pretty loud.

“You have to leave sir,” a nurse tells him.

“No, I need to be here for her,” he tells her, walking to the pregnant lady who’s baby is due any moment now.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” the pregnant lady asks, hissing back pain. Her hand holds tightly onto her baby bump, her other hand pulling the sheets.

“I came to see you give birth, love,” he says. She groans out her words, the baby turning and twisting in her body.

“Sir, please leave before I call security,” the nurse woman huffs. Harry ignores her and holds the lady’s hand in his, soothing her pain by a little.

“I can’t leave; she’s giving birth to my son.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHAT  
> WHAT  
> WHAAAAAAAAT


	17. (coming home)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lana gives birth to a bouncing baby boy.

**//**

> _There's a tale that I'm humming like a bold baby's coming. Isn’t wrong to imagine that someday I'll have the two of us side by side? **~**_ **_Eleni Mandell_**

**\\\**

** **

 

 

**_Harry Styles_ ** _@Harry_Styles 1 min ago  
It’s a bouncy, baby boy = #BabyEdward. Congrats @lanadelrayy  http://instagram.com/p/od7FxmqAh4/#_

 

#BABYEDWARD begins to trend immediately on Twitter, with people congratulating both Harry and Lana on their baby, some confused if Baby Edward is really Harry’s… On Instagram, Harry had thousands of likes and comments in equal measure from the picture of Lana holding her baby in her arms, Harry kissing her temple.

“We look cute don’t we?” Lana says, looking at the Instagram picture.

“The rest of the world thinks so too,” Harry says, smiling at the picture and tweeting some fans about Baby Edward. “They really love you.”

“What’s Louis going to think?” Lana asks Harry gently.

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Harry confesses, “I think he’s going to get the wrong idea about all of this.”

“Obviously, everybody thinks that Baby Edward is your son,” Lana says, “we should tell the world the truth, who the baby really belongs to.”

Harry shakes his head quickly. “We can’t do that, I need to keep you safe from _him_. He needs to stay away from you and as long as I say I’m the father, the better our plan will work.”

“You’ve already done so much for me,” Lana says, “even if you were miles away, touring the entire world on your own. You helped built Baby Edward’s nursery, bought a billion and one clothes, sent the boys’ to take care of me, Perrie was even here before you came and I think she’s still here. Thank you for all of this, for taking care of me, for being with me through the screams of removing this baby of ours, sorry Baby Edward” – she coos at Baby Edward – “and I don’t think I’ll ever repay you.”

“No, you need to stop talking and thanking me because I wanted to do all of this and besides, you’re my girlfriend, aren’t cha?”

“Ew,” Lana grosses out, “you and me would never work even if you were straight.”

Harry fake gasps, “Offence taken, no really!”

“Listen, here,” she says, handing Harry the baby. “Take care of him, I need to sleep for the next two weeks.” Harry slowly takes sleepy Baby Edward from Lana, holding him close to his chest.

“Aren’t you the cutest baby?” Harry mumbles to Baby Edward, “Yes you are, yes you are Baby Edward.”

“I think he likes you.”

“Yes he does, don’t you? I am better than Mama Lana aren’t I? Aren’t I Baby Edward?”

The nurse comes into the room, checking on Lana’s health. “You see fine Lana, you’ll be ready to leave in three days.”

“Three days?” Harry asks, “Isn’t that too early?”

“If I could go today I would but Nurse Julia over here thinks I should stay,” Lana says from her bed, setting herself comfy, “Do you have more pillows?”

“She’ll be fine,” Nurse Julia tells Harry, “She just needs to rest for a couple of days before going home. You can come to take her on Thursday, if you want.”

“I will.” Harry cuddles Baby Edward closer to him, his forefinger caressing the baby’s delicate skin. “You’re so adorable! You have good genes Lana, honestly you do.”

“I know!” Lana says. “Now hush, lemme me sleep for the next three days straight, or until Perrie burges in with gifts for Baby Edward.”

“I should probably leave before she sees me.” Harry gives Nurse Julia, Baby Edward, grudgingly of course. “I better go.”

“Bye!”

“Gosh, you’re feisty, why so angry?”

“I just gave birth to Baby Edward, what do you think?”

“Pray he doesn’t hear that.” He then turns to Baby Edward, “Did you Baby Edward?”

“He’s asleep, he can’t hear you,” Nurse Julia tells him.

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Harry mumbles to himself, Lana catching it. He presses his lips to Lana’s forehead. “Have a nice sleep! See you on Thursday.”

 

**+**

“Orange suits you.”

After the hospital, Harry headed to see Caroline in jail. He had to be extra careful as now the whole world knew he was in London, specifically at the London National Hospital, where Scotland Yard went straight away but Harry, cleverly already left. He decided to visit Caroline before the boys as who knows the next time he’ll see her, now that he was back and according to the world, he was the MOST WANTED person… in a bad way. He thankfully made it to jail without anybody spotting him (apart from that redheaded fan on the street, _argh_ , where did she come from?)

“Shut up!” Caroline groans into her hands.

“How’ve you been?” Harry asks, his hands spreading on the metal table.

“I hate this place,” Caroline complains, “It stinks. I have to wear this stupid orange onesie thing every single day, the people here are mean… do you know jail is not like in the movies? We don’t have buddies, there aren’t mean tattoo looking people, only racists, murders, thieves you know, the _good_ people.”

“And rapists, according to everybody else,” Harry adds. He removes something from his duffel bag and pushes it across the table. “Here, you deserve it.”

“What is it?”

“If you don’t want the five red velvet cupcakes, then please let me take them back,” Harry says. She quickly opens the brown bag, a few other prisoners looking over their shoulders, to see what’s inside. She takes a huge bite off one, her eyes closing shut, a husky foodgasm erupting from the back of her throat.

“This is absolute delicious!”

“I knew you’d love them so I brought more.” He removes other brown bags of cupcakes, one holding Oreo cupcakes and others holding Watermelon-flavored cupcakes.

Caroline’s eyes go wide open, gleaming on her face like a sunflower. “All these for me?”

“You deserve it, I mean one and a half years in jail is a pretty long time.” Harry regrets letting Caroline having stayed for so long in jail as he traveled the world, the sun, the food and whatnot while Caroline rotted in jail. “But now that I’m back, you’re going to stay out of court and jail for the rest of your life.”

“Hmm,” Caroline hums, munching on her cupcake. “You want one?”

“Nah, I’ve had too many when I was sixteen,” he says. Caroline gives him a blank stare. “Working in a bakery and all… I told you I worked in a bakery before X Factor!”

“No you didn’t,” she says, taking another cupcake, an Oreo one this time.

“Oh right, we were busy having sex you didn’t bother to learn about what I like, my hobbies, what I prefer to do on a date other than partying with my girlfriend’s sister and her boyfriend who are all above 35 years.”

“You hated him, didn’t you?”

“Yes, I don’t even know how your sister married that crazy wacko!”

“In fairness, he’s happy we’re not dating anymore, you know, cougar stuff and all.”

“I still don’t like him, he’s annoying, and a brat and-”

She takes a large bite of her cupcake. “Calm down, I rarely see him anyway because my sister is moving to Scotland with him for his new job.”

“Thank goodness!” he heaves a sigh of relief, “No more evil carnevol from Jelous Boyfriend Guy…”

Caroline lowers her head, putting down her cupcake. “Listen Harry, thank you for coming back because honestly I didn’t think I’d ever see you. Almost two years without seeing your face is really a long time but thank you. I know you’re taking a huge risk coming to see me-”

“Don’t worry, nobody knows I’m here,” Harry says, helping himself with a cupcake.

“But I’ve been thinking about the whole thing that night we slept together-”

“When you took away my virtue and drugged me so that I didn’t remember any of it? Oh I remember that night. Well, you do more than me, how was it?”

“Cut it out Harry,” Caroline lightly smacks his bicep. “I said I was sorry but you were being a bumhole that night so I wanted to liven you up. But let’s not relive that night, we need to move on and find a new dance to the new music that’s playing. What’s your plan of getting me outta here?”

“I’m going to testify in court saying that you didn’t rape me,” Harry says simply.

“Sounds good enough.”

“It’s going to work because quite frankly I didn’t actually say it was rape in my entry and nor did I say ‘No’ to you.”

“But what about the jury?”

“Jury can go suck a d!ck!”

“Harry,” Caroline hisses.

“I’m going to tell them that I loved you and that we had fun that night yadda yadda yadda.” He pauses, taking another bite off the Watermelon cupcake. “These really are good.”

“Have you seen Louis?”

“Nope that’s why I came to see you first… well after seeing my son, Baby Edward,” Harry tells her, “he’s the most cutest baby ever, looks exactly like Lana.”

“You wanted a child with her? I thought she was for publicity?”

“She was and since you’re in jail you’re not going to talk to anyone I can tell you that Baby Edward isn’t my son.”

“What?”

“Yeah he’s not. She and this guy hooked up and long story short, she gave birth today morning to Baby Edward and he’s the absolute cutest. But we’re telling the world he’s my son to protect her.”

“From what?”

“Stop asking questions you don’t want the answer to.”

“Harry, we broke up over six years ago and you still don’t trust me?” Harry remains silent. “I don’t have feelings for you if that’s what you’re worried about.” He still remains silent. “Please tell me who the baby daddy is?”

“I need to go,” Harry says. “I have to go face up the one person I’ve been avoiding since I landed yesterday.”

“Are you coming back to visit?” Caroline asks him softly.

“Of course I am, I’m not leaving you to rot here,” he says. He softly presses his lips to hers, tasting Oreo cupcake on her lips. “Goodbye love.”

“Bye Haz.”

 

**+**

** **

 

Sitting across Zayn’s white mansion, Harry debates whether to go in or drive another round killing time. Honetly, he was scared to meet the lads. It’s been almost two years since he last saw them and he knows he’s going to feel a little odd when he’s with them. He sees two figures at the window moving, one looking like a man with lots of hair, probably Niall or Zayn.

“Great, they’re actually home,” Harry groans to himself, cooped up in a borrowed car.

He stays longer in the car, overthinking the situating, overanalyzing if they would actually like him or maybe they might ice him out, debating what to tell Louis when he sets his eyes on him. His heart beat increases when he thinks of Louis. Two years is a long time, he doesn’t even know how he looks like anymore! Does he have longer hair? Is it still that brown chocolate color? Are his eyes sparkly blue than they were two years ago? Does he till gag and groan when he wants to watch _The Notebook_ with him?

“You’re overthinking this Harry!” He pockets out his iPhone, and dials up King.

_Hello_

“Hi King!”

_Harry? Harry is that really you? Yo Grimmy, Harry’s on the phone!_

“I need your help,” Harry says. Nick comes to the phone, arguing with King to talk to Harry, but Conor talks above them.

_Hi Harry!_

“Hi Conor, listen guys!” Harry says, “I need your help. I can’t seem to go in.”

_In where?_

“Inside Zayn’s house. Everybody is in right now, I’m assuming, and I don’t know what to do or say when I get there…”

_Where are you now?_

Harry replies to Nick, “I’m parked outside Zayn’s house and before I decided to drive off, I saw two people moving at the window, like they were kissing, (I wonder if that is Perrie) and I’m really nervous… like super duper nervous.”

_Super duper? No one says super duper._

“I do when I’m nervous.”

_Why are you nervous, just enter through the door._

“I can’t.”

_Don’t you have the key?_

Harry listens in to King telling him, “He ain’t locked outside dipshit” then Nick says, “Then he can go inside can’t he? He has legs!” and King replies, “He’s scared of Louis.” and Nick understands.

_Didn’t ya pop some pills?_

“I did,” Harry tells King, “I took two blue ones and five yellow ones, you know, habits die hard and all. Should I go?”

_Listen Harry, you need to calm down. They’re not going to hate you when you walk through that door, not Niall, not Zayn, nor Liam or Louis. They’ll all love you!_

“You think?”

_Yes we do, well I do. I know Louis will be the happiest one of all of them to see you. Why are you nervous anyway?_

He nods listening to Conor. “I think they might not like me, like they might hate me for it.”

_For leaving? Stop overthinking this Hazza._

Harry bites his lip. “What do I do then?”

_Just open the door to your car, walk up to the door, knock and let the rest unfold. Then tomorrow morning we’re coming to get you and you finally get to spend some time with us!_

“Really Grimmy? I was planning on flying inside the house because I’m spontaneous like that.”

_Hush Grimmy! Nick’s just being Nick. You need to get his conception that Louis is going to hate you. Just enter the house, you’ve taken the pills, so now go!_

“But I-”

King cuts the phone before he could ask another question. Damn, now he was all alone. It was now or never, he might as well just go through the door, whatever happens, happens. He exhales loudly and gets out of his borrowed Ferrari. He walks towards Zayn’s door in the dark, his entire mansion full of light that his fingers itch to his iPhone to take a picture of it. He decides against it, lifting his hand to the door turning the knob. The door opens up, hearing the most familiar voices in the entire world: Niall’s laugh, Liam’s voice telling the boys off as usual, Louis shouting the loudest at something he was doing and Zayn, quietly talking.

Yes he could hear Zayn talking quietly because if you listen carefully, you can hear the voices that you want to hear. He closes the door, tiptoeing closer to the voices, they get louder and sees the people belonging to the voice more clearly. They were all seated together, Louis and Zayn’s back facing him, playing FIFA on the plasma TV [typical Zouis!], Niall was sitting coolly on Liam’s lap, laughing at whatever he is saying. Are they together? Harry questions.

His breath hitches in his throat when Niall locks eyes with him standing behind the wall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HE'S BACK ! HE'S BAAAAAAAAAACK FINALLLLYYYYYYYY.... it took a baby to get Harry back home LOL


	18. (back for you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry comes bearing presents for each of the boys.

**//**

 

> _One day I'll come into your world and get it right. You say we're better off together in our bed, I'll say we're better off together here tonight_ **~ One Direction**

**\\\**

** **

 

“HARRY!” Niall gushes and screeches his name, running to Harry. Louis and Zayn pause their video game, following Niall’s body to where it was going, Liam’s mouth falling to the ground.

“Nialler!” Harry smiles, opening his arms for Niall to fill. Niall hugs him really tightly, so tight he can’t even breath. “You’re choking me Niall!” Liam jumps into the hug sandwiching Niall in the middle. “You guys, chocking over here!”

“We want to hug him as well,” Zayn says.

“No,” Niall shakes his head. “I haven’t seen him in ages.”

“Neither have we,” Liam says, detaching himself from the hug.

“C’mon, Niall, let me hug the others then we can continue hugging,” Harry says. Liam smiles when Niall steps back and he too hugs him properly, not wanting to unwrap his arms around him.

“I missed you so much,” Liam says, standing back to look at Harry up and down. “Honestly you haven’t even changed a bit! Well maybe your height-”

“C’mon hug him and leave so that I can continue hugging him,” Niall says, pulling Liam away.

“Harry!” Zayn glees happily. Harry throws his arm around him, his eyes glancing quickly at Louis. “I missed you too, I’m so happy you’re back. You must be hungry from your flight from… where were you?”

“Uh actually I came yesterday from Malaysia,” Harry corrects him.

“You came yesterday?” Louis questions, only air between them, Niall and Liam on one side, Zayn on the other.

“Yes.”

“And where’ve you been this entire time?”

“I thought you’ve been stalking me?” Harry winks at Louis but he remains numb, staring hard at Harry. Harry clears his throat, cursing himself for coming today, why didn’t he come tomorrow to see them? “I went to see Lana in the hospital and then went to see Caroline.”

“Lana? She gave birth, didn’t she?” Niall questions.

“Yeah, this morning,” Harry smiles. “Baby Edward.”

“Named after you?” Louis asks, his face still blank from any emotion Harry could read.

“Yeah, he is my son after all.”

Liam asks, “Do you have pictures?”

“No, Nurse Julia was practically chasing me out and Perrie was coming soon so I couldn’t stay.”

“And Caroline?” Louis questions.

“What’s wrong Louis?” Harry sighs.

“Nothing.”

“Aren’t you going to hug me?”

Louis doesn’t budge from his spot, Liam coughing away the awkward tension. “So, what brings you back?”

Harry frowns to himself, saddened by Louis refusing to hug him. “Uh, oh presents.”

“Really?” Niall gushes, picking up the bag from behind Harry. “What did you bring us?”

“Aren’t you going to let him give you the bag?” Zayn asks.

“Well he’s busy staring at Louis he’s not going to notice if I take a peek.”

“Let him give you the present first,” Liam says, rubbing his back.

“Fine,” Niall huffs.

“What’s wrong Louis?” Harry asks, concerned. Louis shakes his head, his eyes starting to wet. “No, please don’t cry! I’m here, I’m right here.”

“You weren’t there before,” Louis weeps, “You were never there for nearly two years.”

“I’m here now Lou, I’m here,” Harry tells him.

“Ugh, please hug so we can open presents,” Niall says.

“Let’s open the presents,” Louis cries, walking away from Harry.

“Uh, let’s,” Harry says, making mental note to talk to Louis later.

They join Louis on the floor, sitting in a circle with drinks and food in the middle. “Who’s first?” Harry asks, opening a beer bottle for himself.

“Still drinking are we?” Louis asks, sitting across Harry in the circle.

“Me first!” Niall cheers, ignoring Louis and the sad looks Harry is giving him. Harry unzips his duffel bag and takes out a small, neatly wrapped box and Niall snatches it from him. He quickly opens it, all eyes watching Niall giggle and cackle.

“He’s like a little boy on Christmas Day,” Zayn smiles.

“What is it?” Liam asks.

“Autographs,” Niall answers, clutching small cards in his hands. “Autographs from the best football players in the world!” He breathes. “The best!”

“Really?” Liam asks, “Like who?”

“Are they original?” Zayn asks.

“Yeah, when I went to South America I met this guy who had a friend that literally was friends with all of the footballers and I thought of you. So me and my friend went house to house getting signatures from all of them. Then since my friend was weirdly close to me, I think he had a crush on me,” – he chuckles – “he took me to Europe to meet footballers–”

Niall interrupts him and screams, “You met Cristiano Ronaldo?”

“Yeah I did, he’s really awesome,” Harry smiles.

“Who’s this friend?” Louis asks.

“Some Brazilian guy,” Harry says, “Nobody you should know.”

“Drug dealer?” Liam asks.

“No.”

“You hooked up with him, didn’t you?” Zayn asks. Harry ‘Um’s’ at Zayn’s question, Louis shaking his head into his hand. “I’m sorry.”

“It was a one time thing.”

Niall asks Harry, not aware of what was happening. “You got an autograph from Messi too?”

“Yep,” Harry says. “Do you like it?”

“I love it,” Niall hugs Harry sideways, planting a huge kisses and kisses on his poor cheek. “I love it and I love you.”

“Hey!” Liam says. “My turn.” Harry hands Liam his present next. “Boxing gloves?” Liam asks, after opening his present.

“The exact same one that Mohammed Ali used.” Harry’s eye shine as he says it, Liam’s eyes growing wider and wider with joy with his one-of-a-kind gift.

“Mohammed Ali? That’s huge,” Liam says, staring at the red gloves in his hands. He slips his hand into them, saying, “I’m wearing Mohammed Ali’s gloves,” and caresses them to his face.

Zayn wonders, “How did you get it?”

“From your Brazilian friend?” Louis asks sarcastically.

“No Louis. This time, I can’t tell you but it wasn’t easy,” Harry says, “I’m just happy that it was worth every penny I used. Do you like it?”

“Like it?” Liam delights, “I absolutely love it with all my heart! I’m never letting these babies off!”

“You’re going to eat with them aren’t cha?” Zayn asks.

“And drink, shower, drive, sing, laugh, dance, and oh, punch people with it and I’ll be like, ‘You just got Ali on your face’,” Liam says, laughing at his own joke, joined in by Niall.

“Wow, you’ve been around Niall haven’t you?” Harry asks.

“Wha-what’s that supposed to mean?” Niall asks, the laughter dying down.

“I saw you and Liam cuddling when I entered; are you two together?”

Before Niam replied, girls laughter’s emerge into the room, the boys wondering who these loud girls are. Perrie, tagging along Eleanor and Danielle behind her, screams when her eyes fall on the curly-haired boy in the room.

“Harry!” she screams, running up to hug him. “You’re here! I didn’t believe it when Lana told me but you’re here, you’re actually here!”

“I missed you too, Perrie,” Harry hugs her back.

“We missed all missed you,” Danielle says, hugging Harry.

“I’m sorry Danielle,” Harry apologizes, “I’m sorry for telling the whole world about you, Eleanor and Liam.”

“Don’t apologize,” she says, “It wasn’t your fault. Beside, Eleanor and I are now friends thanks to Perrie.”

“That’s great,” Niall says, “Can we go back to opening presents?”

“You got presents?” Perrie asks, “for everyone?”

“Yep,” Harry smiles, “and I have one for you Danielle.”

“Me?”

“I’ll give it to you later,” Harry says, sitting back down. The girls leave to Perrie’s room – giggling – as Harry hands Zayn his present. Zayn opens his slower than the others [because that’s who he is] and out emerges several comic books.

“You got him comics?” Liam wonders. “Lame.”

“Not really,” Harry shakes his head, “Zayn knows their value.”

“These are original, vintage, Marvel comic books! They’re so rare it’s hard to find them, like this one” – he holds a Marvel comic book with Spiderman on it – “only has five copies in the entire world and I hold one of those copies. One!”

Niall’s mouth forms an ‘O’ in surprise. “Oh wow! That’s huge.”

“These comic books are just so you Zayn,” Liam says, gleaming at Zayn. “How did you know Zayn would like it?”

“Because Zayn is a geek for these things,” Harry glees at Zayn hugging the comic books.

“I bet your hot Brazilian boyfriend gave them to you,” Louis says.

Ignoring Louis’ comment, Harry hands the last present to him, the smallest package in the bunch. “Here’s yours.”

“Why is it so small?” Liam asks.

“Are you proposing?” Niall asks eagerly.

“Are you proposing to me?” Louis asks, gazing at him.

“It’s not a ring,” Harry says.

“Car keys?” Louis jiggles his present in his hands.

Niall throws his head in the air. “Sexy car ring dude.”

“Really Niall, really?” Liam rolls his eyes.

“Harry’s weird like that.”

Harry reveals the present. “It’s a car Lou.”

“You bought me a car?”

“Not just any car, a batmobile!”

 

**+**

 

“This is so embarrassing,” Harry laughs, setting his bag on the bed. Zayn and the rest, noticing Louis and Harry weren’t talking to each other – just glancing at each other – to a room upstairs where they could be together and Niall wouldn’t cockblock them. But typical of Niall, he pressed his ear against the door, listening to the conversation.

“Thank for the car,” Louis says, standing by the door, shifting on her feet.

“You’re welcome.”

“I’m just wondering where I’ll be driving it.”

“You could ask Zayn to join you as you drive around London. You guys already have a Scooby Doo minivan.”

“Yeah and I’ll be sure to ask Robin to join me.”

“Are you going to keep standing by the door?” Harry questions, sitting on the edge of the bed. He falls back on it and Louis’ breathe hitches in his throat when he sees his V-line through his shirt. “It’s not like you can leave because Zayn will chase us back in.”

Louis remains silent, his eyes poring over his V-line, imagining where the trail follows below… his… _oh lawwwwd_ … skinny black jeans.

“Lou?” Harry sits up from the bed, heaving as he did. “Gosh, I need to start exercising again!”

“Did you exercise with your Brazilian boyfriend?”

“What’s with you and that guy?” Harry wonders, walking to Louis. He unfolds his arms from around his chest and clings their fingers together. “He didn’t mean anything to me at all.”

“What was his name?”

“Henzo.”

“What kind of name is Henzo?”

“The kind of Brazilian you’re jealous of,” Harry answers, “but he’s over and you’ll never hear about him again.”

Louis slams his head on Harry’s chest, wrapping his arms around his waist and hugging him tightly. He breathed him in, all of him. He smelt like fresh air, the type of fresh that smells like pure air of 5AM… the one that isn’t polluted by the day’s events. He felt Harry’s arms rubbing his back, caressing away his loneliness for the last one and a half years – technically two. He was overjoyed that he could hold Harry into his arms, his body against his chest, his hot breath slowly hitting his neck. Harry planted a kiss to his hair before and he felt Louis take a huge breath against his warm chest.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Louis apologizes. “I’m sorry for being a d!ck head that didn’t notice you love me. I’m sorry for everything I’ve ever done. I deserved it though, nearly two years without you is enough punishment and I-”

“You keep apologizing all the time for not knowing I fell in love with you but you need to know, I forgive you,” Harry said, his lips close to Louis’ ears.

“I’m sorry for being a douchebag, sorry for not running up to hug you but I was-”

Harry rocks him, his arms squeezing Louis a little tighter. “It’s my fault, I run away from you and I never showed up when you keep to meet me at the airports nor in South Africa, sorry I didn’t rush straight away to see you from the airport but Lana was giving birth to my son I had to go see Baby Edward and her-”

“I understand,” Louis shakes his head against Harry’s chest, “I should have known about Lana and her baby… I mean, your baby. I didn’t know. I really didn’t know.”

“C’mon,” Harry stands back from Louis, still in their embrace with each other, “let’s go sleep because I’m really tired. And I have a feeling Niall is listening in.”

“No I’m not,” Niall says from behind the door. Louis laughs to Harry’s shirt and Liam shushes him, “You darn idiot, they can hear you now.”

“Goodnight Harry,” Liam says to them, “Goodnight Louis.”

“Let’s go sleep.” Louis is led by Harry to the bed. He watches him lift off the bed covers, his eyes lowering their gaze down Harry’s muscles, moving beneath his shirt, if that were ever possible. “Are you okay Lou? You’re becoming pale.” Harry snaps him from his gaze on his body that he didn’t notice he had turned red.

“Nah, I’m not pale, just dandy,” he squeals out, “dandy bamby is what I am. Bamby the dandelion is my name.”

“What?”

“Sleep, you said you wanted sleep.” Louis climbs onto the bed, feeling the bed lower behind him. Harry holding up the covers for him to fully cuddle up close. He lowers the covers on themselves, Louis tangling their feet beneath the bed sheets.

“Are the lights on?” Harry asks looking at Louis.

“I think they are,” he whispers. And then he says out loud, “Niall!”

Niall barges into the room, nanoseconds later, “What?”

“Switch off the lights.”

“Really? You called me to switch off the lights?” He asks and then sees Larry Stylinson snuggled in bed. “Aww, are you both sleeping together tonight?”

“Go away Niall,” Louis groans, Harry nestling his head to Louis’ chest, shutting his eyes.

“Can I give you both a goodnight kiss?”

“Are you serious Niall?” Zayn questions.

“Stop coming into my room you guys,” Louis shouts.

“Technically it’s my room because it’s my house, you’re just sleeping in it,” Zayn corrects him. Louis snarls at him watching Niall walk towards the bed.

“Typical Nialler, cockblocking everything,” Liam says.

“Get off him Niall,” Louis says, pushing Niall off Harry. Harry chuckles beneath Louis.

“I wanna kiss him goodnight,” Niall protests.

“Get off him!”

“No!”

“Just one kiss Niall,” Harry says. Niall sticks his tongue out at Louis, the latter rolling his eyes. He pulls his lips together and presses them to Harry’s temple. “And you?” Louis sighs in defeat and let’s Niall kiss him goodnight too.

“Now go!”

“Fine, harsh boy, I’m leaving.” Niall gets off the bed, Liam switching off the lights and locking the door. In the dark, Harry leans in and presses his lips to Louis lips for the first time since he stepped to Zayn’s house.

“This is probably douche of me but I’m really desperate to kiss you,” Louis says.

“Kiss me, Boobear,” Harry tells him in the dark. Louis holds his face in place and crushes his lips on Harry’s, waiting after what seems like ages, he finally gets to kiss him. He gets to explore all of Harry. Every single point of him. He twists and turns his head, brushing his lips with Harry’s once again, missing the taste it gives him.

 _Yum_.

Harry kisses him back, rubbing his back as well, tangling and tingling his toes all at once, if that was even possible. This amazing boy, Louis blushes as Harry sandwiches his rosy lips. He kisses him in a hot messy snog, leaving him breathless after only seconds but not wanting to stop, he swipes his tongue on Harry’s bottom lip, asking for access. Harry grants him access but Harry dominates in the tongue battle, Louis smiling into the kiss.

“You idiot, lemme win,” Louis whispers, forehead presses against his.

“No,” Harry winks in the dark. Too bad Louis didn’t see it. But it didn’t matter, Harry rolls him over, and smashes his lips to his neck, biting down upon it, nibbling and gritting, Louis lifting his legs up to his waist.

“I missed you,” he breathlessly says. Harry mums his words, snogging once again, him missing the feel of Louis’ lips on his. He breathed him in, groaning when Louis’ thigh rubs against his crotch, clutching his hair tightly as he could because, _gasp_ , this boy would be his downfall.

“I missed you more,” he replies, lifting him off the bed and sitting in an up and locked position on Louis.

“Prove it.” Harry accepts the challenges, his moist lips finding Louis’ in the dark, wanting more _passion_ , _desire, ache_ and his own little Cheshire boy.

Slamming Louis back on the bed, Harry says, regrettably, “Sleep. Now!”

“I want your lips on mine,” Louis pleads. Harry presses his lips to Louis’ and back against chest, he holds him tightly, rubbing his stomach slowly. “Are you rubbing my stomach?”

“It’s cute,” he says, his warm breath feeling _great_ on his cold neck, “and you’ve got a little potty too.”

“I do not,” Louis shakes his head, “I have proper abs you know.”

“M’sure love,” Harry mums sleepily. “Go to sleep.”

“No,” Louis whines, “I want to kiss you.”

“Goodnight Lou.”

“Please,” he whines some more.

“No.”

“I want the taste of your lips-”

“Stop quoting Ed’s song.”

Louis sighs, “But they express what I’m feeling right now.”

Harry opens his eyes in the dark and looks at Louis, slightly seeing his glowing orbs in the dark. “I promise tomorrow we’ll do all sorts of kissing that you want but right now I really, really want to sleep.”

“You’re just a sleazebag,” Louis says snuggling against Harry’s bare chest.

“I’m your sleazebag.”

“Goodnight sleazebag,” Louis smiles when he brings their tangled hands close to his beating heart.

 


	19. (drunk in love)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Niall have a wild night out!

**//**

> _So tell me nothing’s gonna change yeah, and you’ll never walk away, yeah **~ One Direction**_

**\\\**

 

“WHAT are you guys doing?” Zayn asks Niam who are standing outside Louis and Harry’s room, “You guys aren’t spying on them are you?”

“No, pfft, never.” Niall looks away from Zayn.

“So how’s Perrie?” Liam asks.

“Management called,” Zayn says, with a tinge of sorrow, “they sounded mad on the phone.”

“I know, they said they’re coming for a meeting,” Liam nods, “something about going to Honolulu.”

“A trip maybe?”

“I hope so, we all deserve a trip,” Niall smiles.

“Yeah, two years of doing absolute nothing, no song writing, no touring the world, no making albums, just searching for Harry really deserves a trip to Honolulu.”

“Stop being mean, Zayn,” Niall says. “Looking for him was hard and we need to wake them up before Modest! comes.”

“I’ll go help Perrie make breakfast,” Zayn says, walking down the stairs. Niall barges into the room, shouting, “Wake up!” and Liam crosses over and draws the curtain, light shining bright into the room. Liam joins Niall on the bed, who was jumping up and down, singing Irish songs.

“What the hell?” Louis groans to Harry’s chest who was rubbing his eyes.

“It’s a beautiful bright morning, wake up!”

“Not anymore,” Louis mutters under his breath.

“C’mon Lou,” Liam says, “Modest! called, said they’re coming in an hour for a serious meeting about touring and whatnot.”

“If this is what coming back mean I would not have come back.” Harry speaks for the first time and the three lads face stop smiling and laughing and turn into sad, crestfallen faces, especially Louis’ whose eyes were gazing deeply at Harry’s. “I’m joking,” Harry says, looking at the lads.

“I hope so,” Niall says.

“Get off,” Louis grunts when Niall collapses in between Harry and Louis on the bed, “aren’t you meant to be cuddling Liam not us?”

“Threesome?” Niall ponders. Liam scowls at him and Louis rolling his eyes, “right Harry?”

“Nope,” he shakes his head. He gets out of bed, in nothing but his boxers, “last time I was in a threesome it wasn’t awesome.”

“You were in a threesome?” Louis asks him.

“Yeah, a long time ago though,” Harry says gazing at Louis, “and not Henzo, the Brazilian guy.” Louis breaths relief. “What time are they coming?”

“In an hour,” Liam responds.

“What do they want?” Harry asks him.

“Am I the only one who wants to know who he was in the threesome with?” Niall asks the three lads, Louis agreeing that he too is curious. He secretly hopes it wasn’t Grimmy, King, Ed or even Conor. Or that Tristan guy.

“I’m not telling,” Harry winks at Niall, “but if you’re up for it, I know someone who would join us.”

The three boys gape at him, words evading their mouth. Did Harry just suggest they join in on a threesome? “I’m joking,” Harry laughs it off. He walks to the bathroom and stops at it, “or am I?”

 

**+**

 

After breakfast, the boys walk into Zayn’s office [“Zayn has an office?” Niall questions walking in] where Modest! including Simon, Jill, Mark and the rest, were waiting patiently for them. Louis sat next Harry, his leg lazy over Harry’s and their hands tied up, Niall stuck in the middle with Liam and finally Zayn, his fingers scratching the sofa.

“First of all I would like to thank Harry for coming back, two years is a really long time,” Jill begins, “And since we have so much to do, I will move right into business. We have already talked with the rest of the Management and we have agreed that you’re going back to touring.” Niall cheers loudly and the other lads smile. “You’ll start touring in July, 2 months from now, but before July you will need to probably write a few new songs, you know, talking about what you’ve been up to for the last two years since Harry’s disappearance.”

“I didn’t disappear, I run away,” Harry corrects.

“Speaking of, Harry you are well aware that you’re facing several arrest warrants-”

“Thanks to you,” Louis murmurs.

“It’s not our fault we wanted to bring Harry back,” Mark says.

“Yes it is.” Harry clutches Louis’ hand, telling him to drop it. “I will not! They had no right in telling Scotland Yard that you killed Ed and Ellie because it’s not true!”

“Drop it Lou,” Harry says against his lips, silencing him instantly.

“Oh, and we need to talk about Larry as well but later,” Jill continues, “Like I was saying, because you’re facing several arrest warrants we need to keep you safe until everything is sorted out. So, we have booked you on a flight for Hawaii tomorrow night.”

“What?”

“Yes!” Liam and Niall cheer.

“No!”

“Why not Harry?”

“Because I have so much to do and going on a trip is not one of them,” Harry sighs.

“Let Jill explain,” Simon silences him.

“No,” Harry stands up for himself clutching Louis’ hand a little firmer, “I am not going to be bossed around by you guys again. I run away because Jill and Mark blackmailed me for being gay so they made me do everything like dating stupid girls, forcing me to wear clothes I didn’t even like, singing songs that I absolutely didn’t care about because they knew I was gay and I was afraid of coming out of the closet. Both of you used that against me but not anymore.”

“Actually we can still tell you what to do,” Jill corrects him. Harry glances at Simon and he nods at him. He tells Jill, “Actually you can’t him what to do.”

“What do you mean?” Jill and Mark ask at the same time.

“Legally I am not part of One Direction anymore because I e-mailed Simon my resignation later.” Harry smirks at Jill and Mark, feeling on Cloud 9 that he finally was one step ahead of them. The feeling subsides when Louis softly whispers in his ear: “You quit the band?”

“Ye-yes I did,” Harry says, gazing at Louis. He looks away at him, his eyes fixed on where their hands meet. “But I could come back-”

Louis jumps onto Harry, hugging him tightly, ignoring who was watching them. “Please, please come back! We’re not the same without you and you can’t be in your own band! What if you actually left, what would we be called, Four Direction?”

“That doesn’t actually sound bad,” Mark hums to himself.

“We heard that!” Liam says.

“Since you’re not in the band, technically we can’t force you to go to Hawaii but we can tell the other lads that they are definitely going,” Mark says.

“No,” Simon says firmly, “if the band is to do anything they do it uniformly, not in halves. If they’re going to Hawaii, they go together as a band, including Harry. Now Harry, I know some of the reasons you left was because of us, but we want to make you feel like you _own_ the band, that you can freely make your own decisions without a third party suggesting to do this or that-”

“Yes,” Liam agrees, the other boys following too.

“So let’s make a deal,” Simon leans forward in his chair, “you go for this trip to Hawaii and when all of you come back, you will get to decide which countries to have a concert in for the On The Road Again Tour, the dates, the lights, the stages, how many days you want in each country, the set list, the opening act-”

Zayn and the other boys gasp at the sudden freedom they have! “Really?” Liam asks, “we get to decide all of that?”

“Yes,” Simon nods.

“But they’re not ready,” Jill points out.

“We are!” Louis replies to her.

“We’re more than ready actually,” Niall says, “we’ve really missed the stage so much and now we all can’t wait to get back on it.”

“You’re just saying that because finally, we get to go to Jo’Burg!” Zayn smiles at Niall who nods sheepishly.

“So Harry, it’s up to you,” Simon says and with that Modest! leave, the boys left alone to their thoughts.

“So?” Louis turns to Harry, resting his chin on Harry’s broad shoulders. The latter could feel Louis’ eyes burn into his temple and probably spot the vein that was pumping furiously to his brain.

“So?” he croaks, turning his head slightly to face the older lad.

Niall asks, “Are you coming with us?”

“Of course, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else apart from you guys… but not now,” Harry says. He stands up, Louis whimpering, and takes out his phone, typing furiously. “I need to go see people then I’ll be back before dinner.”

“Dinner?” Louis questions, “why are you staying out so late?”

Gazing at Louis’ blue eyes, he replies, “I need to talk to my sister, apologize, Lana, Caroline, King, Grimmy-”

“Can I come with?”

“Why do you want to go?” Liam questions.

“I…” Louis is at a loss for words because truly, he doesn’t have a good reason to go with Harry, apart from just being with him. He doesn’t notice how close Harry’s face is to his [when did he get down to him?], hands trapping him like a cage. He bent his knees and sat on Louis’ thighs, smiling brightly down at him. Louis gapes at him, his smelling senses perking up because _holy cow_ , is that Harry’s cologne? He smells heavenly!

“I’ll be back before you know it,” Harry tells him, his breath hitting Louis’ lips.

“I want you here with me,” Louis says. He closes his eyes and leans in, his lips aching for Harry’s. He feels him get off the couch and opens his eyes to see Niall smirking at him. He laughs loudly at Louis, whose lips were perked like a duck. “Harry!”

“Sorry love,” Harry apologizes, laughing internally with Niall. “But seriously, I’ll be back before dinner.”

“I’ll miss you,” Louis says earnestly. Harry blows him a kiss and walks out of Zayn’s office.

 

**+**

** **

“Harry!” Danielle cries as Harry and Niall pass through the doors to Zayn’s mansion, drunk and high than higher. It’s 4:03AM and way past ‘dinner’ time that Harry promised he’d be back.

Danielle asks, sternly. “Where’ve you been?”

“Weyhey!” Niall cheers loudly, staggering on his own two feet.

“Niall?” Liam questions.

“Ou-out,” Harry smirks, hugging her, “I’ve missed yo-o-o-o-o-o-u!”

“Pew!” Danielle scrunches her nose, “you reek of alcohol and weed. Where were you Harry?”

“I told you out!”

“Weyhey!” Niall cheers loudly and then suddenly laughing. Harry joins in laughing too, Danielle and Liam stand back, watching the two laugh like two idiots.

“Where out?” Danielle asks with a bit more anger, “where have you been? It’s 4AM and now is when you’re coming back?”

“Ye-e-e-e-s ma’am.” Harry laughs with Niall at the reply, ignoring the boiling temper Danielle was having.

“Louis had been worried sick about you! You promised that you’d be back before dinner but you didn’t return. We called Lana who said you had left over 3 hours ago and she had no idea where you were.”

“I was with Ki-i-i-i-i-ngston, Sean Kingston,” Harry says on the floor, making a Snow Angel with Niall.

“Who’s Sean Kingston?”

Liam replies, “Technically he means King and Sean Kingston is a singer.”

“Weyhey-y-y-y-y-y-y-y!” Niall cheers, “Snow Angels!”

“Snow Angels!” Harry shouts louder than Niall.

“Take Niall, please, I’ll deal with Harry,” Danielle advices and Liam takes care of Niall. She lifts Harry off the ground but stumbles down with him, his weight surprising her. “My, you’re so heavy!”

“You’re just we-e-e-e-e-e-ak.”

“Louis missed you! Why they hell did you not come back like you said you would,” Danielle wonders, kneeling near him.

“Hmm, I ca-o-o-lled King telling him I mis-s-s-s-s-s-sed him,” Harry narrates his tale as best as he can, but it proves to be a challenge as the alcohol is messing up with his speech, “and h-he told me that the lads were a-t-t-t-t his place so I w-we-e-e-e-e-nt to his house after Lana’s then I met Grim-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-y… he’s amazing! He’ perfect with bla-a-a-a-ck hair, you kno-o-o-o-o-o-w? The perfectestestestestest bla-a-a-a-ck hair.”

“After you went to see King?”

“Oh right,” Harry’s mouth forms an ‘O’ shape thinking what he did after meeting up with the lads. He shuts his mouth and squints his eyes. “You-u-u-u are very pretty by the way-y-y-y-y-y-y, did you know tha-a-a-a-a-a-t?”

“Harry get a grip!”

“The ki-i-i-i-i-i-nd of pretty that should never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever never ever ever ever be cheated on,” he says. A breath escapes from her mouth, vivid memories of _that_ day, hitting her like flashbacks. Eleanor and Liam. Liam on top of Eleanor. Eleanor’s open mouth. Liam’s back muscles to her. Eleanor’s scream. “I’m sor-r-r-r-r-r-r-ry I told the world about you-u-u-u- and Elewhore and Payno-o-o-o-o-o. I p-w-omise that I never told anyone, p-w-omise no one! I re-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ally didn’t.”

Danielle shakes her head. “It’s fine.”

“Are you sa-a-d?”

She gazes at Harry, who is looking at her with child-like eyes through his long eyelashes. She shakes her head, “No, I’m happy it happened because I would have never known what kind of man Liam is.

“Are you ma-a-d?”

“No.”

“Are you ma-a-d at me-e-e?”

“I was but I’m not, it’s not your fault that the whole world got to find out but Zayn’s fault.”

“Are you ma-a-d at hi-i-m?”

Danielle doesn’t answer him but instead helps him up. His alcoholic breath hits her face when he says, “I think yo-o-u are but, here’s a secret, I also-o-o don’t like him.”

“We need to get you in bed-”

“But he ha-a-d his reason-o-ns Da-a-ni bear, he had his reasons.”

“Okay,” she heaves, “You need to sleep!”

“I have to tell Lou-u-u-u-u-u-bear goodnight first,” Harry says, holding onto Danielle’s shoulders tightly when they walk up the staircase.

“Fine, you tell him goodnight, take a glass of water and then sleep,” she instructs him. The reach Louis’ room and before Harry enters he turns to Danielle.

“What?” she asks after Harry looks at her for quite some time.

“I ma-a-y forget what about this conversation in the morning but I should tell you before I forget…”

“Tell me what?” she asks after he stalls and continues staring at her. He bites his lips, contemplating whether to tell her or not to tell her, it wasn’t really his secret to tell, or his job to tell, but the alcohol in him did.

“Liam still likes–lo-o-ves, still loves you,” he tells her and for a moment she believes him until she smells the alcohol from his mouth.

“You’re drunk.”

He shakes his head, “No-o, well yes, I am but what I’m saying is true. That beautiful, bea-u-u-utiful boy still loves you. He may be kissing and se-e-e-xing it up with Nialler but you’re the one he thinks about a-a-ll the time. He’s too much of an as-s-s-s-s-s to apologize to you for what he did but he really is sorry.” He stops and cups her cheeks, grabbing her full attention. “Please don’t be hard on him, give him a chance of forgiveness.”

Before she can reply, he’s turned away from her, turns the knob and sees Elounor kissing on the bed. Harry’ eyes gape at them; gape at Louis’ hands deep into Eleanor, her hair all over him, their bodies in a mix like a Checker board.

“Harry!” Louis says first, breaking the kiss hastily. He roars and runs to the bed, his fist aiming for Eleanor’s face. Instead, it meets with Louis’, his head falling back on the bed.

“Louis!” Eleanor gasps at her ex-boyfriend’s beaten face. “Are you okay?”

“Eleanor?” Danielle questions, “what are you doing?”

“I’ll tell yo-o-u,” Harry roars drunkenly, “being the who-o-o-o-re she’s always been.” He gathers the energy and _fire_ and mounts on the bed to beat Eleanor for making out with _his_ Louis. He doesn’t make it when two other strong arms hold his body back, leaving him running on the spot. “Let me go-o-o-o-o.”

“No! You’re going to hurt her!”

It was Zayn.

“She deserves this,” Harry explains, rage and _fire_ running through his body, “she was kissing my Lou! My Loubear!”

“Eleanor?” Danielle questions, the scene being too familiar to her. Last time she caught Eleanor in a situation like this was when she was having sex with _her_ boyfriend and now she’s kissing Harry’s?

“I can explain!”

“You better,” Zayn says pushing Harry back from jumping forward, “because Harry’s very strong!”

“Louis was just wondering if he’s really gay or just bisexual so I told him we should figure it out by kissing me,” she explains, “but you weren’t meant to find out.”

“Why not?” Harry roar-questions.

“Harry, it was nothing, I swear,” Louis says, cupping his own cheek in pain.

“So do you like her?” he questions. Louis shakes his head, denying it. “So you love her? Is that it then? You love Elewhore?”

“No!” Louis shakes his head. Harry shouts “Liar” at him, running to add another black eye but Zayn holds him back. “I love you not El.”

Harry jams Louis with questions, angry tears falling down his cold face, “So you lo-o-o-o-ve her? Is that it then? You love Elewhore? Is that it, you fancy her, hu-u-u-u-u-u-u-h? Is this it?”

“Stop Harry.” Louis stomps his foot. Even though he broke up with Eleanor, no one should insult his girlfriend, nay, ex-girlfriend. “You promised you’d be back by dinner but you didn’t. Instead, I find out form your sister that you went partying with Nick and King all night when you said you’d be back. You liar! You left for nearly two years and you’re already leaving?”

“I didn’t know spending time with my friends was illegal and I had to a-a-a-a-a-sk for your permission,” snarls Harry. He attempts to take a punch at Louis but Zayn stops him.

“You’re out partying with King instead of taking care of your stupid baby!”

“Don’t call Baby Edward that!”

“You’re a terrible father already, getting drunk while Baby Edward’s mother is suffering on her own, taking care of him-”

Danielle sees Harry getting upset at Louis calling him a lousy father; a dad that can’t even take care of his baby and prefers to turn up instead of spending time with the tired mother who spent all day nursing, cuddling, feeding, bathing and _mothering_ the baby. Harry stops angrily moving towards Louis and drops his head on Zayn’s bony shoulder, wetting his hoodie. “Louis stop!” Danielle shouts at him.

“I will not!” Louis shakes his head. Eleanor holds his hand, “You’re upsetting him.” Harry sees the hand holding and his swelling rage is now mixed with gloom. And question after question that Harry asks, thereafter, is scared of the answers.

“You don’t like me anymore? Is that why you were making out with her?... D-do-do you not want to be gay… with me…Lou? Do you prefer being with a girl because it’s easier? Is that it?” – he chokes back a few tears – “Do you like her b-b-better because she’s a girl? Because she’s not me, a boy? Or is it because people won’t hate yo-o-ou for being different when you d-d-date her? Is that it?”

“Harry,” Zayn stops him, holding him by the waist.

“And to even think I came back for you. For you Lou-u-u-u-u-u! I came back because I was ready to be with you forever but then I see you kis-s-s-s-s-sing El-eleawhore and I wonder if it was all worth it,” he cries at Louis but it looks like he’s talking to himself because his head is buried in Zayn’s shoulders. Zayn rubs his back, soothing him as he empties his fears. “Why don’t you like me?” He slides down Zayn’s body, hugging his legs like a baby clasping one finger. “Why don’t you like me-e-e-e?”

“Harry.” Louis steps forward to comfort him but is stopped when his wails grow louder and he clutches Zayn’s trousers, straight to his skin beneath them.

“What the fuck have you done Louis!” Danielle shouts angrily at Louis who looks up to see her. “Look what you’ve done to poor Harry!”

“I didn’t kiss her!”

“Yes you did. And you Eleanor, what the hell were you thinking? You and Louis broke up or did you get amnesia and forget? Why are you such a s|ut El? You have sex with my ex-boyfriend then kiss other people’s boyfriends when they’re taken? What kind of person are you?”

“I…”

“Don’t talk to her like that,” Louis says. Zayn kneels down and holds Harry tightly in his arms, rocking him back and forth.

“No, let me tell you exactly who you are. Coming from someone who has watched you over the years, you’re not the goody goody two shoes that the fandom knows you as, or what the media speaks about you, or what the boys think of you, because you’re not. You’re a manipulative bitch you thinks she can get whatever she wants because her father works with Sony Music.”

Louis turns to El. “Your dad works with Sony?” She remains mum as Danielle continues hurling the truth at her, although now, it seems like insults. Louis drones out everyone. Almost everyone. Just the sound of weeps, tears and snots is all he can hear, like a ringing ear infection that won’t go away.

Truthfully, he slapped himself already at what he had just done with Eleanor. How could he even, for a second, doubt he didn’t love Harry? He does, doesn’t he? No he does but then why did a teeny itsy bit of him want to kiss Eleanor? Is it because of what Harry said, that he preferred El because of what everyone else will think, that he prefers kissing girls than boys because he’s scared of the insults? Is that it? Is that why he kissed her? IS IT??

He looks at Zayn rocking Harry, his curls blocking his face. This boy came back for him, for him alone. He feels like he waited all his life for this moment to be with him, to hold him in his arms, but his silly head still has doubts. He still doubts that Harry loves him.

The voices in his head keep telling him that Harry doesn’t love him, that _he_ loves Grimmy more than him, and why does he think this? Well, the moment Harry left him at the airport two years ago, a part of him convinced himself that Harry didn’t love him. He had good reasons to – he left him and the airport and didn’t talk to him for nearly one year and a half later!

But he has to change.

He came back for him, right? With the little seed of faith that Louis still holds within his soul, he’ll start to believe that Harry loves him, _deeply_ loves him; loves him more than silver, gold and platinum. Cheesy? Well, Louis is cheesy, he loves cheesy. Sue him!

He walks over to Harry, Danielle attempting to stop him but Zayn shakes his ahead at her. He slowly leans down on his knees, coming to full face with Harry’s tear-stained face. Despite the fights they used to have during the X Factor days, the fights they had in their apartment before Harry left and even now, Harry would always listen to Louis, always.

“I… I have…I’m sorry, I… I don’t-” Louis begins, struggling to find words. He takes a deep breath and begins. “I loved you the moment I kissed you at the airport two years ago, I loved you last night when you didn’t come home for dinner, I love you now at” – he glances at his watch – “5:36AM, I will love you when I wake up to your face, I will love you for the next 7 months, and every day after that.”

Harry wipes his tears with the back of his hands, sniffing and swallowing the extra saliva in his mouth. His glittery eyes continue gazing at Louis who continues talking, now holding his hand [the one not with snot], “And… and even if we’re never together ever again, Heaven forbid, If… if I’m ever with somebody else-”

“No,” Harry quietly whispers.

“It will always be you that I am thinking of.”

“Pr-promise?”

“I swear!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drunk!Niall & drunk!Harry are always hilarious


	20. (kids in hawaii)

“SAY cheese.”

The boys crowd around Harry, struggling to fit into the camera view before they get on their 17 hour flight to Honolulu. He snaps the picture and immediately sends it to his Twitter of 51, 078, 306 million followers.

“We look awesome,” Niall smiles looking at the photo. He was kissing Liam on his temple, the latter boys’ teeth gleaming all through. Zayn was squeezed behind the boys and in the front was Larry, dimples, teeth and all smiles from them.

“I hate my hair,” Zayn complains, “you cramped it up before I could take the picture.”

“It looks fine,” Liam reassures him, ruffling his hair on purpose.

“I don’t even know why you bother gelling your hair every day,” Niall wonders.

“Hey,” Harry whispers, pulling Louis back from the lads. He turns around. “Let’s take a photo.”

“Didn’t we just take one?” he questions, “You’re becoming a white girl.”

“I meant, uh, me… me and you…us together… in a picture.” He struggles to say what he wants, awkwardly shuffling in his place, grasping onto his phone hard.

“Of course!” Louis cheers. Harry’s face lights up and he stretches his arms in front, Louis slipping in between them. “Turn it so that we both fit, your big hair can’t be seen.”

He positions his camera in a landscape manner, Louis taking the camera [“You’re not holding it well,” Louis argued] and snaps a picture; he snaps a moment in time when Harry’s face brushes against the shorter lads’, arms around his waist, giggling.

“We look adorable,” Harry gushes, “post it to our Instagram.” Louis does, to their shared Instagram account: Larrystagram which, hard to believe, was the most followed account on Instagram! They get to their seats, finally, and the plane takes off, Louis holding onto Harry’s hand tightly.

“Do you not like planes?” Harry asks, his breath warming his cheekbone. He nods frantically. “Do you want me to hold you?” He nods again. He undoes his seatbelt and straddles him, holding him tightly against the turbulence.

 

In the past week, Harry did a lot of things, things that entailed making amends and in general, seeing people he missed. In a way, _he was remembering to put the glass down._

Up first was Gemma, his younger sister. He flew to Sheffield University to see her, a few fans spotting him. He stayed the night much to Louis’ protests [“She’s busy studying, why go see her?” Louis would argue as he packed]. Caroline was up! He went to jail, bringing in the cupcakes like last time to cheer her up. She had apparently gained popularity, as Harry found out when he walked down the jail corridors, some of the prisoners scared of her, the security guards even knew not to ‘disturb’ her.

Visiting Grimmy was an issue, one was that Louis didn’t like Grimmy and two that Niall had to come along because he and King were really good friends, apparently. As usual, King threw a party, drinks, girls and drugs were in plenty downstairs as the five of them upstairs [Niall passed out!].

“I don’t know why they’re still investigating her death,” King said that day in King’s room talking of Ellie Goulding, music blasting through the walls, “That bitch’s been dead for years.”

“You guys should confess,” Niall slurs, high from snorting cocaine.

“I thought he passed out,” Conor wonders.

“You should take care of this,” Nick points at Niall making Snow Angels on the floor to Harry.

“If your hit man didn’t confess then maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess,” Harry reasoned out, blowing smoke from his lips, “maybe if you told him to shut it and pay him more money, oh I don’t know, then he wouldn’t-”

“Or oh, I don’t know, if ya didn’t run away like a kid for two years,” King argued, “then I’m pretty sure Scotland Yard wouldn’t ‘ave been on this case. It would be some local thing that we would easily ‘ave paid off with good money… and maybe weed.”

“Weed?” Nick questioned.

“If they like that sorta thing.” King shrugged, snorting a line of coke before Niall did, “but who doesn’t want good weed?”

“Louis!” Niall sings.

“It’s been two years why are they still investigating?” Conor questioned.

“I’m back,” Harry responded, “which is a good reason to start because finally they think they have a lead on Ellie’s death. I’m the only person here who is MOST WANTED by them, they want me, dead or alive and the police can arrest me wherever I am which is why I didn’t want to ever come back to London. I wanted to stay away.”

“How would that help?”

“The more I was away, the more both of you were less and less becoming suspects and I became a huge suspect in the death,” Harry answered King. “But then Lana was preggo so I had to come.”

“Are you going to tell us about that?” Niall asked.

“No because as of right now you don’t need to know,” Harry refused, “and I didn’t come here for a therapy session with Dr Phil, I came to party and live it up like we all know how.”

And for the rest of the night, they forgot their stresses and worries in life and remembered to put the glass down, even if it was for a whole night. Huffy and puffy Louis was angry about Harry spending the night with Grimmy [“I was there with Harry,” Niall told him, “and a billion other people.”] so he took him to babysit Baby Edward as Lana went to film her music video for _West Coast_.

“Aren’t you the cutest baby in the world?” Harry asked Baby Edward sitting in the nursery. Baby Edward gazed at Harry with complete interest, cackling a little. “What are you looking at Baby?”

“Your face maybe?” Louis suggested walking into the blue-walled nursery holding warm milk. “Why can’t Lana breastfeed him?”

“Because your mother is a hard worker, isn’t that right Baby Edward?” Harry coos to Baby Edward, “Isn’t that right?”

“He’s adorable, isn’t he?” Louis asked, Harry handing him Baby Edward. He crawled away from him but then stopped midway, cackling at something on the floor. “He’s so weird.”

“Wh-what if we-we named him Edward William Del Ray?”

“William?” Louis questioned, lying on his stomach as Baby Edward crawled slowly to him. He stretched his tiny fingers to touch his mouth, then nose, then closed his eyes. “What are you doing Baby Edward?” he asked Baby Edward.

“Yes, William, after you,” Harry said bluntly. Louis continued playing with the baby, not hearing out what he was driving at. Harry dropped the subject and decided to ask him later. “I need to take a picture!”

“Absolutely not!” Louis shakes his head. Baby Edward was sitting in front of his face, cackling and cupping his cheeks and gazing at Louis with huge wonder. Too late, Harry snapped a picture for their Instagram account – Larrystagram – and took another when Baby Edward softly kissed his nose.

“That was adorable,” Harry awed at the both of them, quickly uploading the other photo too to Instagram. He handed the bottle of milk t Louis to feed Baby Edward who shook his head and crawled away. “He loves you.”

“Nah, he loves his Dad more,” Louis shook his head gazing up at him.

“He loves his Uncle just as much.”

“I’m an Uncle?” Louis asked threading his fingers with Harry’s.

“Of course.”

“Uncle William?”

“Is there any other cool uncle with that name?”

“Prince William,” Louis said abruptly.

“That’s random.”

“Not as random as Baby Edward crawling back and forth to us.”

“Why is he going to the nursery bed?”

“Do you think he wants to sleep?”

“But he just woke up!”

“That’s what Lana says every time so I don’t think he’s slept for a while and it’s two already,” Harry reasoned out. “He should be asleep.”

“Let’s put him to sleep,” Louis suggested Harry holding him up. Harry lifts Baby Edward off the floor amidst cries and wails and sets him back down when he stopped and continued crawling. “Or maybe not.”

Harry sneaked his arm around Louis’ waist, enjoying this time spending it with somebody who loves him back and his son, his almost son, that he was trying to soon tell people that Baby Edward wasn’t his. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I you,” he responded, kissing his lips.

“I you?”

“I meant I love you too,” he smiled into the kiss Harry sneaked up on him. “And I’m trying.”

“I know you are.” Harry rubbed his back, watching Baby Edward crawl back to Louis feet. “I know you’re really trying but sometimes, just sometimes, it hurts to think you think I don’t love you.”

“I know,” Louis placed his arms on Harry’s chest, gazing up at him, “It’s just that, you having a baby with a girlfriend that technically wasn’t your girlfriend is… it’s hard to swallow.”

“I know it is. I can’t imagine how you feel but I understand.”

“You do?” Louis asked. They both didn’t notice Baby Edward had crawled back to Louis, curled up like a ball, sucked his finger and slept near his foot.

“I used-used to imagine you having kids with Eleanor,” Harry explained. “I mean, both of you practically didn’t look like a break-up was coming anytime soon so what does a boy with a huge crush on his best friend do? Imagine you guys having kids, living happily and thinking I can’t give you any of that.”

“Yes you can. You can give me more love than Eleanor ever did and we already have Baby Edward-”

“He’s not yours.”

“Who cares? We… I can pretend-imagine he’s ours,” Louis smiled at him, tiptoeing to kiss him on the lips, Harry riding up his shirt. Louis breaks the kiss, feeling something hit him on his toe. He looked down and saw Baby Edward sleeping on top of his toe, sucking on his thumb. “Take a picture!”

“You guys are adorable!” Harry coos snapping the photo button on his phone multiple times. “He’s so tiny.”

“He is,” Louis agrees. Harry took him off his foot, happy he was finally asleep and delicately set him in his cot, turning on the music with dolphin sounds.

“Why do you put that horrible music?”

“Lana’s request,” Harry shrugged.

“Sounds horrible, doesn’t it?” Louis whispered close to Baby Edward.

Out of the blue, Harry asked again. “How does Baby William sound?”

“I don’t know, good I guess,” Louis answered. “Reminds me of Prince William for some reason, “Why’d you ask?”

“No reason,” Harry shook his head, watching Louis mesmerized by Baby Edward sleeping. He whispers silently again, “No reason at all.”

 

 

17 hours after the plane has landed in Honolulu, the boys are driven to their hotel along the Coast, another 2 hour drive. Tired and fatigued, they arrive at the hotel, a Shangri-La hotel that only the rich and the Who’s Who stays which includes One Direction. The boys rush in to the hotel’s reception to get their room, rushing to get the best room, one with a balcony!

“Mine,” Niall smiles when he gets to Room 836, one with a breath-taking view of the beach. Lucky Zayn got a beach view as well but with a balcony but unlucky Liam got a view of the parking lot. There was one room left and it was to be shared by Harry **and** Louis and it was no coincidence. The boys planted the whole thing – Larry was to share a room.

“I love it.” Louis says even though it comes out as half a question.

“We have a balcony at least,” Harry says, opening the window. “Besides, this lake is beautiful.”

“Do not take a photo,” Louis says sternly, watching Harry pocketing his iPhone. “You’ve already taken like a billion photos of nature, knees, slippers for your Insta but people don’t care about that, they want to see selfies and shirtless pics.”

“But I like my pictures,” Harry pouts. “Our pictures for our account.”

“I can’t believe people actually followed the account,” Louis tells him.

“I have the best room!” Niall barges into their room at the moment, Zayn following him.

“Actually I do,” Zayn disagrees, “I have a beach view and a balcony, all you” –he means Niall –“do is have a beach view. And you guys have a lake view which is beautiful.”

“Really?” Harry smiles, smirking at Louis. “Do you want to take a picture?”

“Already did,” Zayn says, already uploading a picture to his Instagram account.

“But I still have an awesome room, I heard that the sun shine through the curtains in the morning it feels like Heaven,” Niall says.

“Why did I get the worst room?” Liam huffs coming into the room. “I got a view of the parking lot! The fucking parking lot.”

“You can share a room with me,” Niall suggests, “I have a fantastic view of the beach.”

“Minus the balcony,” Harry points out.

“Zayn does have a nice room,” Liam says, contemplating if he should share a room with Zayn.

“But I have the sun!” Niall says. “The sun!”

“And I have a lake,” Louis says. “So who’s the loser here?”

“Me!” Liam answers.

“No, it’s me,” Louis snorts. “I have a friggin’ lake!”

“Oh, because a lake is much worse than a parking lot full of cars,” Liam says sarcastically.

“Oh because Beamer’s, Benz and Bentley’s are worse than looking at fish!”

“You can see the fish from here,” Niall smiles.

“Really, Niall? You’re not helping!”

“You can crush with me?” Niall suggests.

Liam refuses, “No, then Zayn will win!”

“Because we all know I won by getting the best room,” Zayn smirks, munching on hotel snacks.

“I think we have a good room,” Harry glances at Louis.

“A lake sucks!” Louis disagrees but then rethinks. “But it’s better than a parking lot view with no balcony.”

“But I have the sun,” Niall smirks joining in on Zayn snacking. “Which none of you have.”

“Apart from me,” Zayn smiles at all of them. “So I’m the winner here.”

 

**+**

** **

 

“Let’s ta-take another selfie,” Harry suggests in a shy manner. They have their feet in the sand, sand castles behind them built by all the boys, the sun setting in front of them. Louis is tucked between Harry’s legs, his arms wrapped around his knees.

“You and your dumb selfies.” Louis rolls his eyes but he glees. He takes the phone from him as Harry buries his head into his neck. He snaps the moment, the orange-red sun setting on their faces. “It’s lovely,” he whispers in awe.

“You’re lovely!” Harry says in a cheesy manner. He pockets the phone, after uploading it, as Louis snuggles back to Harry’s body, mindlessly mingling their fingers. “This sunset reminds me of when I was in Galapagos Island. It was beautiful and for a moment I wanted to go back in time and bring you back into the future to watch the sunset with me. But here you are, watching it with me and I would never want to be anywhere else.”

“Me neither,” Louis hums, his lips pressed to Harry’s neck. “I wish you brought me with you.”

“You know I couldn’t,” Harry regrettably says. “I was running from everything.”

“Your monsters?”

“I didn’t want to be gay, you see, I wanted to be normal like you, Niall, Liam and Zayn. I so badly wanted to not be gay. Dr Hitsugaya told me to take the drugs, hoping that it would help me deal with my demons but it didn’t work. I was still gay when I woke up.”

“How… how did you deal with it?”

“Being gay or the drugs?” Louis tells him the first option.

“Not well. To be honest the only time I liked myself for who I was was when I was with Grimmy and the lads. They made my monster look human, like an angel but then when I left, it came back, raging in me, beating inside my body wanting to come out and be free.”

“Then you took drugs to shut it?” Louis asks, shifting his head up.

He nods. “It was the only way. I would stop thinking about it. It would take my mind off it. I started taking them at night and soon enough I took them during the day until the only time I didn’t take them was when I was either eating or drinking something. But even with drinking, I only drank alcohol.”

“Were you scared?”

“Of?”

“Me?”

He doesn’t answer for a while, watching the last ray of sun disappear deep into the horizon where the sky and sea meet.

“Yes. I already lost you to Eleanor, so I couldn’t lose you anymore. You and Zayn used to say how gays are disgusting, they’ll rot in hell because they’re unnatural, they don’t deserve to even be alive and I couldn’t help it, I wanted my demons to be gone. I wanted them to be gone because If they were gone then you would like me. You wouldn’t think I’m a disgusting human being who doesn’t deserve to be alive.”

“But you remained.”

“Because I trusted Eleanor. I knew that she would make you happy no matter how many times she used you and you didn’t notice, no matter how many times she forced you to do things you didn’t want, she would call you in the middle of the night and you would jet to Manchester immediately, no complaints, no nothing. I said nothing.”

“Why? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because she was a girl.”

“Harry,” Louis mumbles. He lifts himself off Harry, his eyes at par with his sorrowful orbs. He gazes at him, cupping his cheeks into his hands. “Why would you even?”

“Be-because she’s a girl. And I’m a fucking boy.”

“So? It doesn’t change anything. I would love you even if you are a boy-”

“Uh, Lou pretty sure I’m a boy,” Harry giggles.

“You know what I meant. I can’t believe I’m saying this but Niall told me-”

“You’ve been getting love advice from Niall?”

“He can be wise sometimes,” Louis says feeling Harry arch his feet around his body on the sand.

“What did Mr Wise Guy tell you?”

“He told me that people shouldn’t fall in love with gender but with people. I, he told me, fall in love with people not gender. I love you Harry and I don’t care that you’re a boy. I don’t care that society labels me as gay because I didn’t fall in love the conventional way with a girl because it doesn’t matter.

“It does.”

“No it doesn’t. Screw them, it’s you I want and you I fell hopelessly in love with too fast and too deep.” He takes a chance and kisses him hard.

“People will hate us!” Harry argues.

“People love Larry Stylinson.”

“We can’t get married.”

“England legalized gay marriage, by the way.”

“We’ll never have a family.”

“We can always adopt. And besides, we have Baby Edward don’t we?”

“He’s not yours,” Harry points out.

“He’s yours,” he convinces him. Harry glances away – another secret he hasn’t told Louis – and wonders if he should tell him the truth about Lana’s baby; that the baby is not his. “And I love him with all my heart and soul.”

“I love you with all my soul,” Harry says leaning in to steal a kiss from Louis. He drags him to lay down on the beach, hands snaking underneath the covers, like _untold sins_. Louis grabs a fist of his curly hair, rubbing his crotch against Harry’s. _Ugh_. The latter moans into his mouth, breath against breath, green eyes with blue, towering his hands above his head. He leans down to Harry’s lips, tasting a faint scent of _cherry_ on his lips. Harry tries to untangle his fingers from Louis but he’s stronger and he sinks them into the sand just like he sinks his tongue down Harry’s throat. The latter arcs on his back and thrusts his throbbing cock to his.

“I want you now,” Louis moans to his neck.

“Beach?” Harry questions, his heart beating a thousand miles per hour. _Oh my_.

“Here, now!” Louis commands _breathlessly_ , looking across the beach, now in darkness.

“We might be caught though,” Harry whispers against his lips. His breath hitches when Louis plays with his zipper.

“I want you…now.” Harry stops Louis’ hands from unzipping any more of his _passion_ , kissing him gently.

“This,” – he breaks the kiss – “this feels like falling in love.”


	21. (a game that dared the truth)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When a game of Truth or Dare becomes a little too real...

**//**

> So let’s go crazy crazy crazy till we see the sun cause we wanna live while we’re young. **_~ One Direction_**

**\\\**

“I believe you do have your own hands to feed yourself,” Zayn says.

They are all sitting across the breakfast table at the hotel, crunching on the delights of the hotel, the sun high as a kite. Louis is sitting on Harry’s lap, having abandoned his own breakfast and eating on Harry’s instead.

“Why don’t you eat your own food Louis?” Liam asks. He sips on his orange juice that Niall graciously poured for him.

“Just because your girlfriend isn’t here Zayn don’t be jealous,” Louis says, leaning in to the Nutella-on-toast Harry is giving him.

“And I want my Loulou to be healthy.” Harry digs into his plate with a fork and instead of eating what’s on the fork, Louis leans near Harry’s mouth and eats it.

“That was mine Lou!” Harry protests.

Liam pretends to puke, “You two are too mushy mushy.”

“Yeah and I think I’m going to leave,” Zayn says, placing his napkin on the table.

“Where’re you going?”

“I heard there was a really good spa up in here,” he says.

“Well we should meet for lunch to talk about the OTRA tour,” Liam says in all seriousness.

“But we’re on holiday Payno, not at work,” Niall groans.

“Modest! e-mailed the reception to tell us that we should discuss the songs that we will sing.”

“You’re lucky I love you or else I would’ve ignored you,” Niall says, throwing heart eyes at the man who took his virginity.

“Defo leaving now,” Zayn says, waving at them.

“I think he’s angry about all of us being gay and with each other,” Liam says, resting his head on Niall’s shoulders.

“Who cares! He deserves it,” Niall says.

“Stop being mean,” Harry says, “you can’t blame him for it. He’s homophobic and we’re rubbing it in his face. And also I think he misses Perrie.”

Niall groans when Harry mentions her name. “What’s wrong Niall?” Harry questions, his eyes darting to Louis and pecking his nose.

“He doesn’t like her,” Liam says. “And I don’t even know why. Why do you hate her?”

“Because I think she’s like Eleanor,” Niall explains, “Using Zayn for his fame and fortune.”

“Eleanor did,” Liam nods.

“Uh, Perrie is already famous because of being an amazing singer in Little Mix not because she’s dating Zaynie Pie,” Louis says.

“Little Mix are only famous because of us, because of dating Zayn that’s how she’s famous.” Niall rolls his eyes, and stuffs his face with food.

“You might wanna slow down there gorgeous,” Liam says handing him a glass of juice.

“Don’t blame him Niall, he just misses Perrie,” Harry says.

“It’s only been a week since he last saw her,” Niall says.

“A week since I saw Baby Edward too,” Harry pouts.

“You have a baby right here” – pointing at Louis – “feeding him, nursing him,” Liam says winking.

“My baby,” Harry nuzzles his head in Louis neck, breathing in his Apple shampoo.

Liam smiles at them in admiration. “Aww you guys are cute together I wish both of you had found each other waaaaaay long ago and not now.”

“Not as cute as us though,” Niall smiles, leaning in to peck Liam’s lips.

“You know what, I need to enjoy this place because I don’t think I’ll ever come back,” Louis says, getting off Harry, “So I’m going to the beach. Want to come with?”

“Of course,” Harry smiles up at him, holding out his hand for Louis to hold, “you guys want to come with?”

“Nope,” Niall shakes his head, “I want more breakfast.”

“I’ll stay, making sure he doesn’t eat the entire hotel!” Liam smiles, Niall sticking out his tongue at him. Larry walk back to their rooms, hearts in their eyes. They change into their swim shorts [Harry in a tight yellow short and Louis in a knee-length flowery short] and race to the beach, Louis reaching their first. For hours they played in the water, splashing here and there, Harry dunking Louis below the ocean half the time and Louis shouting, “stop that!” when under the water but all Harry heard was “afbaoa sfajfajk!”

“You keep hitting your ear and a fish will pop out!” Harry says, his back on the beach, tanning his body

“Maybe if you weren’t dunking me in the water all the time,” Louis says, hitting his left side of the head. “I hate this water!”

“You didn’t complain when you dipped me back in and kissed me,” Harry smiles at the memory.

“Help me!” Louis whines.

“No, I’m busy tanning,” Harry says settling his head on his hand. Louis shakes Harry’s body, Harry not bulging from his spot. “Go away Lou.”

“No!”

“What are you doing?” Harry questions. Louis laid his wet ear on Harry’s stomach, where the butterfly tattoo was, the leaf tattoo on his hipbone burning in his eyes. “Get off me!”

“No, I’m waiting for the water to drain out of my eyes and drop on your ugly butterfly tattoo,” Louis explains.

“It’s for charity,” Harry says, “and I thought you liked it?”

“I do now because you got uglier tattoos, these leave branches on your hipbone are uglier.”

“Says the one with a Pacman tattoo and a stick figure tattoo as well.”

“It’s sexy,” Louis rolls his eyes. Air runs out of his body when he sees something rise in front of him, something beneath his yellow trunks. “And you’re sexy as well.” And it rises again. “I love you, you know that?” _Rising._

“I love you too,” the voice behind him tells him. He smiles and tells him he love him too. Ever so slowly he trails Harry’s hipbone with his middle finger, smiling to himself when Harry wriggles beneath him. He follows his happy trail and stops when it goes through his shorts.

“Stop!” Harry whispers behind him. He doesn’t. He blows air through the opening of his trunk. “Please Louis.”

“Your dick disagrees,” Louis says, speaking of the tent on Harry’s yellow swim shorts. He grazes his middle finger across Harry’s milky skin inside--

“No!” Harry abruptly shouts. He shoves Louis off him and runs down the beach, his legs spread awkwardly apart.

“What did you do?” Louis turns around, breathing a sigh of relief when he sees it’s only Zayn, and not the pedophile he had in his mind.

“Nothing much,” Louis says, embarrassed at what he was doing… or heading to with his finger down-

“Nothing makes Harry run down the beach from you,” he says, sitting near him, pushing his Ray Bans on top of his quiff.

“I-I was doing so-something s-s-sexual…”

“Ugh yeah, I don’t want to hear anymore!” Zayn fake-gags at what he says.

“It’s not that bad you know,” Louis says, “we did other stuff that wasn’t sexual. Like we cuddle in the water, _kissed_ under water-”

“Hmm, romantic and sounds like Harry, all cuddles and flowery sh!t.”

“Ha! Actually that’s me, I’m the cuddly one he’s the sexual one.”

“Nope, you’re the sexual one. All the hip thrusts you do on stage, the sexual innuendo you used to tell Eleanor, changing our lyrics to talk about your d!ck and all the time Harry would sing nursery rhymes!”

“I know right,” Louis laughs, “remember that time he sand Old MacDonald during rehearsals?”

Zayn laughs. “And then Niall joined in and for the entire day we didn’t even sing anything else cause those two couldn’t stop singing Old MacDonald-”

“Had a farm,” Louis sings.

“No, we’re not doing this again!” Zayn shakes his head. “You like it?” Louis looks at the mini-castle Zayn built in literally 3 minutes. “What am I looking at?” Louis huffs, hiding is awe.

“A sand castle.”

“Why are you building sand castles?”

“Because I don’t want to listen to your sex life with Harry,” Zayn says bluntly. “And also I like sand castles. It reminds me of when my mom used to take us to the beach and I would compete with my sister in who makes the fastest sand castles. I would always win.”

“You should compete with my sister Lottie,” Louis says, building his own castle as well, “she would literally build it that it became huge and threw shade on ours.”

“Your castles are pathetic!”

“Are not!” Immediately his castle falls around it. Zayn laughs at him, clutching his stomach. “Dammit!”

“Anyway,” Zayn says after he stopped laughing and watched Louis build another castle, pathetically at that, “I came to call both of you to hang out with us… Niall’s words, to bond like old times when we went to Harry’s stepfather’s house after the X Factor.”

“Hmm.”

“Is it weird we’ve never heard about him since that day?” Louis shrugs at Zayn question. He eyes him with suspiciousness. “Don’t you find it weird?”

“I don’t talk about his family,” Louis says. He bites his lip before continuing, “I also wonder why he’s so distant from them but he finally talked to Gemma after two years so that’s a start.”

“And his mom?” Louis shrugs his shoulders. “Why don’t you help him bond with his mother?” Louis shakes his head. “Why not?”

“It’s not my job okay?”

“He’ll listen to you won’t he?”

“Yes but-”

“You love your mom don’t you? You can’t do a day without speaking to her or if you can’t speak to her you text her because you love and miss her… yet Harry’s been doing that all this time. Not texting to his mother, or speaking to his father, or even bothering to know where his older sister, who we found out way later he had, is-”

“I know you’re being all Zayn right now and yes it does bother me at times but Harry and his family don’t talk to each other, like at all… that’s their bonding moment. Like how some families talk, like ours do, his don’t.”

 

**+**

 

“Truth or dare!” Niall starts.

They are seated comfortably in Zayn’s room because he had the best room out of all of them but later changed to Liam’s room because they finally found a positive side: his room was generally bigger.

“No Niall,” Zayn shakes his head, sipping water from his bottle.

“Truth or dare is the bestest game in the world,” Niall says, crunching on Oreo cookies, “And we’re going to play it, right Payno?”

“Yes,” Liam smiles at him, kissing him in time.

“You’re forced to say ye because you’re both dating,” Zayn huffs, “and are you going to keep smoking?” He turns to Harry who was smoking two cigarettes, like old times.

“He can smoke,” Louis says, Harry sticking out his tongue. “And he looks hot smoking doesn’t he?”

“I do?” Harry blushes, exhaling toxicity from his lips. He smiles when he sees Louis gaping at him.

“Like I was saying, truth or dare,” Niall continues, “and we have vodka, gin, whiskey, and this” – he holds a bottle with Russian writing on it –“… mostly what Harry told me to order and I got food as well, what I’m familiar with.”

“Thanks Niall,” Harry smiles, leaning into the circle and grabbing an entire bottle of gin for himself.

“Who starts?” Liam asks.

“You,” Zayn says after spinning an empty bottle. It coincidentally lands on Liam, and he picks Dare.

“I dare you,” Zayn says thinking, “dare you to…Oh, I got it. I dare you to-”

“Sometime this year Zaynie,” Louis says.

“I dare you to drink toilet water.”

“Ew,” Liam grosses out, “that’s sick.”

Niall laughs on the floor, “It is sick. Nice one Zayn.”

Liam stands up, Zayn following as well as Louis to take a video for Instagram. “Is that pee? Don’t you flush the toilet Zayn?”

“This is your room!” Louis says, already filming.

“I flushed the toilet you idiot, you used the toilet didn’t you? You used it before we started, didn’t you?”

“Well,” Zayn smiles, “secret’s out. So now, drink up Liam.”

“Ugh,” Liam groans, going on all fours at the toilet bowl. “Your pee stinks. Are you sure you don’t have diabetes? Though diabetes’ pee would smell sugary and sweet like air freshener-”

“Drink up Liam!” Louis shouts. And he does, with a straw! “Yes, we did it Zayn!” Louis high fives Zayn roaring in laughter along.

“Next,” Niall says when the three of them come back, Liam washing his mouth with alcohol and lots of Orbit gum. Niall spins the bottle and it lands on Harry. “Truth or dare.”

“Dare.”

“I dare you,” Niall says, “to give me Justin Bieber’s number” – Liam whispers to his ear with pee breath –“and Jay Z.”

“Fine,” Harry says, handing him his iPhone. “That was simple. My turn.” He spins it and it lands on Niall. “I dare you…”

“I dare you both,” Louis begins then pauses, “Let me whisper to you.”

“Oh yes,” Harry nods after Louis whispers to him, “I dare you to kiss Niall and we post the picture on our Insta account.”

“Deal,” Niall says a little too quickly. “No wait, you just drank pee-water… Zayn’s pee-water I’m not kissing you.”

Liam fake-angry talks, “Is this what our relationship is all about? We don’t kiss cause I drank pee? But it’s only Zayn’s.”

“I still love you,” Niall tells him, puckering his lips against his, the rest of the lads disgusted when Niall kisses him. Harry snaps a photo with his camera. “This is going on the account when we get back,” Harry says.

“You’re perfect,” Niall coos. Liam smiles into the kiss.

“Truth or dare,” the latter says, after spinning the bottle and it stops at Zayn. “Zayn, hmm. I dare you to kiss any one of us to get rid of your homophobic behavior.”

“I didn’t choose,” Zayn says. “And I pick truth.”

“Crap,” Louis curses under his breath, “Would have loved to see him kiss another guy. What else do we have?”

“Run down the corridor naked,” Niall shouts, laughing at his own idea.

Horror flashes across his face and more horror when Louis and Niall jump on him, stripping him already. Below them he says, “I said truth you guys, truth.”

“No, next round Maliky Malik,” Niall says ripping off his shirt. Louis yanks down his trousers which coincidentally come down with his boxers. “Hulk boxers?”

“You have Spongebob boxers,” Liam says.

“This is embarrassing!” Zayn says, everything hanging loose. “So this is what is going to happen, I will run down the hallway, naked, and no one films anything and thanks to the alcohol around here, none of you will remember this.”

“More running and less talking Jawaad,” Harry says. Zayn groans, cameras intact, and runs out of the room and zooms down the hotel corridor. He turns on his heel and runs back to the hotel room. Louis shuts the door, Zayn friggin’ out and banging on the door, “Open this door Tommo!” and “I swear I’ll kill you with my penis.” and “My penis is freezing please” and then in a whisper, “There’s a couple walking towards me, help!” And with that Louis opens the door, Zayn rushing to a room to get his clothes. He comes back into the room, slightly angry which is evident when he spins the bottle quickly.

“Truth or dare,” he says to Harry, “actually since this game has no rules I’ll pick truth for you. Why did you come back? The real reason this time.”

Harry opens his mouth to respond, quickly looks at Louis and closes his mouth. He butts off his cigarette on the floor. He says “I…I came for Louis” but Zayn interrupts him stressing that he needs to say the truth.

“Let him finish Zayn,” Niall says, “for all we know you’re just being a d!ck now because we made you run naked.”

“Or I’m just trying to cool the air here,” Zayn tells him off, “maybe I’m just trying to see the real reason he came back. If it really was for Louis then both of you would be calling each other boyfriends, wouldn’t be acting awkward around each other, the entire world thinks you’re dating when you aren’t and right now, none of you have talked about anything really like why Harry came back, why he quit the band in the beginning and even why he joined the band again so quickly.”

“We were getting to all that soon Zayn,” Louis says.

“Oh really? Because from here it looks like you’re both just enjoying the ride with each other.”

“Not true,” Louis shakes his head and desperately turns to Harry. “We’re not having fun with each other are we? Are we?”

“No, no we’re not,” Harry says and Louis shouts “See?” to Zayn. “But he has a point, I… we haven’t talked about much since I came back. And I came back for Baby Edward.”

“Your baby?” Niall asks. He nods.

“I thought you came back for me,” Louis wonders silently to himself, “ I really thought-”

“Lana was in labor and I didn’t want her to give birth without the father so I rushed here as quickly as I could,” he explains. He turns to Louis, “But I was thinking about you, I really-”

Zayn groan loudly. “Liar! The truth is you didn’t even come back for Louis nor the band or anything really but for some kid you had with a woman you were publicly dating. How is that even possible? I thought you were gay.”

“I believe you Harry,” Louis says softly.

“Really?” Harry’s light up at the love of his life smiles and nods at him. He leans in and presses his lips against his.

“Stop lying to him!” Zayn cries.

“Before this goes downhill, let’s stop and all go to sleep, it’s 1AM anyway,” Liam says.

“Zayn said truth and apparently that’s what he wants,” Harry says, “Here’s the truth from me: I still hate you. I bloody hate you so much right now it’s amazing I’m not killing you right now but I read Louis already did that but trust me, that was an amateur move, I can do it so much worse you’ll be living on a bed for the rest of your life.”

The lads drop their mouths to their neck (food spilling from Niall’s mouth) at Harry but he laughs it off by getting a cig. “Or am I joking?” he winks. He reaches silently to the middle of the circle and spins the bottle and finally it lands on Liam. “I dare you to call Danielle and tell her how much you love her.”

“No,” Liam shakes his head, “I didn’t even choose dare and I was going to say truth.”

“We’re not playing by the rules anymore,” Zayn says and weirdly Harry agrees with him despite threatening to kill him a few seconds ago. “Here’s the phone.”

“I’m not doing this, I love Niall not Danielle,” Liam shakes pushing the phone away.

“It’s a dare, drink up and do it,” Harry says giving Liam a bottle of whiskey and he gushes a huge gulp down.

“It’s fine,” Niall reassure him, cupping his hands around his cheek, “I know you love me, I do because you care about me so much. So much more than anyone. No matter who you call and tell them you love, I know it’s me you’ll be thinking of, it’s me who at the end of the day you’ll tell and you’ll mean it because I mean it when I say I love you Payno, I love you so much.”

“I… I love you too Niall,” he says capturing the moment in a kiss. He turns to Harry, cursing him and calling Danielle.

_Hello… Zayn is that you? How are you?_

“It’ me Liam,” he says lightly.

_Oh, why are you using Zayn’s phone?_

“It’s a da-It’s cause I lost my phone,” Liam says almost saying “Dare” but Harry shakes his head. “In a toilet,” he continues.

_Toilet? Were you texting again?_

“Yeah, texting Niall.”

_Where did you get a phone? I thought there was no phones allowed at your trip?_

“I…” Liam didn’t know what to say because she did have a point. Simon had said no phones or laptops or anything that would connect them to the rest of the world. Now that he thinks about it, how did Zayn get a phone? “I’m a rebel, remember?”

_Oh really? Well I guess you always were. So what’s up?_

“Nothing, just wanted to hear your voice,” Liam says.

“Are you serious?” Zayn rolls his eyes.

“Tell her you love her,” Louis mouths.

_Aren’t you dating Niall?_

“Yes,” he says rapidly and then quickly adds, “But I love you. It’s you I love.”

_Oh so I’m guessing Harry was right._

“Harry? Why was he right?

_He said that you still loved me and you always will._

“He did what?” Liam cries through the loudspeaker. “He said that?”

_Yeah, he was on and on about how you love me, that you don’t love Niall as much as you love me. But don’t think about it, he was pissed off drunk._

“Oh,” he laughs awkwardly, “You know Harry, doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Hey!” Harry whisper-cries to Liam.

_Listen I have to go. I have dance rehearsals right now._

“Oh yeah of course-I love you Danielle.”

_What?_

“I LOVE YOU DANIELLE,” Liam shouts at the top of his lung. And cuts the phone. “Happy now?”

“Yes,” Harry nods.

“Dare for you,” Liam says.

“I see anger in your eyes but please think about what you’re daring me to do. Don’t do something you’re going to regret.”

“I’m already regretting playing this stupid game!” Liam shouts at him. “You don’t know what I’ve done! She’s going to start thinking I Actually like her and everything when I don’t.”

“Calm down Liam,” Harry say, “You can dare me to do anything.”

“I dare you to board on a plane and leave,” he screams.

“Liam calm down,” Zayn says.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Liam cries and storms out of the room.

“Nice one Harry, nice one,” Niall says running after him.

“One more for the road? One last dare for me,” Zayn suggests.

Louis shrugs his shoulders, “Ugh, what’s one more right?”

“In a sentence, Harry, I dare you to show Louis how much you love him?”

“In a sentence?” Louis questions. “You can’t show that in a sentence.”

“You can Loubear,” Harry says, taking Louis into his arms. He grins, his molars showing, eyes drunk yet shining and his heart beating incredibly fast. “Will you be my boyfriend?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finaaaaaaaaaaally one of them popped the question ^*^


	22. (the other side of love)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam tells all to Harry in a bathtub.... whille Louis explains to Zayn and Niall why he did not answer Harry's question.

**//**

> _There’s nothing I can do now to right my wrongs but Jesus walks with me ~ **Kanye West**_

**\\\**

_**(HARRY is pacing around in the bathroom as LIAM is ordering room service through the phone)** _

_ _

**HARRY: “** He said no!” _(mumbles angrily)_ “He actually said no. He bloody refused to be my boyfriend and said no.”

**LIAM:** _(on the phone)_ “Yes please… I’d like two chocolate croissants, two coffees…” _(looks up at HARRY from the bathtub)_ “Make that a double on both of them.”

**HARRY:** “Why would he say no? I thought he loved me too… Or was that a lie?” _(slides fingers through his hair)_ “What if he really doesn’t like me? What if he isn’t gay and he likes Elewhore instead? Has my whole life been a lie?”

**LIAM:** “Why yes I would love to take a survey.” _(HARRY grabs the phone and ends the call)_ “What was that for? I was going to take the hotel’s survey.”

**HARRY:** “He said no! Louis, my love, my only love, said no to me being his boyfriend.” _(strongly)_ “No.”

**LIAM:** “Technically he didn’t respond.”

**HARRY:** “Oh yeah Liam, that makes me feel better!”

**LIAM:** “I’m not even meant to be here with you. I’m pissed off at you with Danielle.” _(stops talking after realizing HARRY isn’t listening to him, mumbles to himself)_ “But of course let’s talk about you.” _(slides lower in the bathtub)_

**HARRY:** “Why do you think he said no?”

**LIAM:** “He didn’t say no Harry, he just walked out of the room according to what Zayn told me. Do you know Niall and I didn’t have sex because of that stupid phone prank?”

**HARRY:** _(sits on the toilet sit, palms on his face) “_ Maybe I shouldn’t…”

**LIAM:** _(stern)_ “Don’t say it.”

**HARRY:** “Maybe I shouldn’t have come back. I mean what’s the point of running away from everything in London and coming back only to be rejected by the one person who loves you? The one reason you come back, damned be arrest, damned be the music, damned be…” _(sigh)_ “Everything.”

**LIAM:** “Where is the food?” _(doorbell rings)_ “Oh thank goodness, food!” _(walks out of the bathroom and comes back with the food. He finds HARRY sitting in his spot in the bathtub)_ “Breakfast in a tub? This is a first.”

**HARRY:** “I should’ve never come back for him. I was an idiot to think that he would even want to be in a relationship with me. I was an idiot.”

**LIAM:** “So you think Zayn was telling the truth when he said you and Louis haven’t talked to each other about what you both are?”

**HARRY:** “I was going to fix that.” _(takes the coffee LIAM passes him)_ “I was going to finally show him that I love him. I didn’t want to be those cheesy people who talk about loving someone and that they’d take a bullet for them.”

**LIAM:** _(chuckles)_ “Catch a grenade for them.”

**HARRY:** “I wanted to take action because action speaks louder than words. But that works too.”

**LIAM:** “Or in this case, silence does.” _(HARRY eyes him badly)_ “You know what I mean. Okay fine, you know me and I don’t like dwelling on the past. What do you want to do now?”

**HARRY:** _(takes a huge bite off his waffle) “_ Run again.”

**LIAM:** “That’s one option. Another?”

**HARRY:** “Drown in a bathtub.”

**LIAM:** _(frowns)_ “Option two.”

**HARRY:** “Smoke.”

**LIAM:** “That’s possible.” _(reaches to the bathroom drawer and removes a packet of cigarette for HARRY with a lighter)_ “It’s Niall’s.”

**HARRY:** “He smokes?” _(LIAM nods)_ “I know he does coke.” _(LIAM gasps)_ “Oh right, yeah he does coke but now he smokes too?” _(sighs)_ “Maybe I should just leave. You know technically I didn’t sign the contract into joining the band again. Simon told me to go for this stupid holiday before I make any final decisions with the band.”

**LIAM:** “So now we’re four people in the band currently?” _(pause)_ “You quit?”

**HARRY:** “I didn’t quit.” _(pauses)_ “I did quit two years ago but then I came back.”

**LIAM:** _(trying to understand)_ “And… quit again?”

**HARRY:** “No I didn’t I…” _(takes a puff of his cigarette)_ “I already quit even before I came back, I quit when Simon and the rest came to Zayn’s house and right now I still quit the band. That sounds grammatically incorrect. Technically I am not in the band as of now.”

**LIAM:** “Why?”

**HARRY:** “Fame gets to your head sometimes. The whole thing messes with your head.” _(munching on Oreo cookies)_

**LIAM:** _(sarcastically)_ “Going to Hawaii for a holiday really does mess with your head, I agree.”

**HARRY:** “That’s not what I meant. You know what I meant? The media, the…”

**LIAM:** “Modest!?”

**HARRY:** _(slowly)_ “Yeah, yeah them.” _(sort of dazed, eyes fixed on the shower head)_ “I wish I had enough courage to stand up to them, to tell them how I really felt, to probably fight more for loving Louis but I didn’t. I was a coward. I just laid back and let them tell me what to do all because they knew my weakness. They knew he was my kryptonite and I would do anything for him. If Ed was still alive he would’ve told me what do. Conor sort of helps but he’s you know.” _(stops, laughs)_

**LIAM:** _(joins in)_ “Conor! Yeah I get it. But he’s trying to be your friend but you just keep ignoring him.”

**HARRY:** “He’s awkward and a loser. I need pills.” _(digs into his pocket, pulls out an orange bottle)_ “Never know when you’ll need one.” _(gulps down three colored ones)_

**LIAM:** _(covers his eyes with his palms)_ “I can’t watch.”

**HARRY:** _(swallow many in a gulp)_ “These ones are tasty, like Skittles really. Found them in Peru. Do you want some?”

**LIAM:** _(shakes head furiously)_ “No, absolutely not. Never. Keep those things away from me. You’re technically bad influence right now: smoking, taking pills, coke. You’re like the bad boys in school that bully people into drugs, smoking, drinking and uh, those stuff.”

**HARRY:** “How am I bad influence? You cheated on Danielle.”

**LIAM:** _(ignores the last part of his comment)_ “You got Niall addicted to cocaine! Coke! Do you know how hard that is going to be to take him off it?”

**HARRY:** _(nonchalantly)_ “I wouldn’t know because I’ve never stopped… nor do I wanna stop.”

**LIAM:** _(sighs, pulls himself up in the bath tub, toes brushing with HARRY’s)_ “Listen, I know right now you’re thinking of quitting the band because Louis said no but here’s what I think. I feel like you only came back for Louis and everything you’re doing right now is because of him, not the band, not the music, not the fans, not even us and now that Louis said no, you’re friggin’ out.”

**HARRY:** “I am.”

**LIAM:** “Well don’t! Because when you were away, Louis was pining over you, beating everyone and anyone who apparently knew more about you than he did which was why King ended up in hospital… and Zayn as well. He would cry, literally, cry tears of pain for not knowing you were gay, he would beat himself every day because you didn’t talk to him on Twitter, he completely stopped talking to Eleanor because of you.”

**HARRY:** _(butts his cigarette on the bathtub floor, lights another)_ “I feel honored.”

**LIAM:** “You don’t realize how much he’s changed since you left years ago. You really don’t. It even took Danielle to bring him back to normal and then Perrie to bring Eleanor and Danielle back to being friends. Actually, we’re all friends, even with Zayn, no matter what he did to you and all… Perrie brought us all together again.”

**HARRY:** _(smiles with his dimple)_ “That’s Danielle for you, doing everything to make you feel better.”

**LIAM:** Perrie.

**HARRY:** Danielle helped.

**LIAM:** “But now that you’re back, he is normal. He’s the usual Louis that you left and the one we know. So please, don’t leave. He needs you just as much as you need him.”

**HARRY:** _(hesitates)_ “You think… you think he likes me?”

**LIAM:** _(puts down his waffle and swallows)_ “Of course Haz! Of course he does. Are you crazy? He loves you not likes. Loves.”

**HARRY:** _(looks down at his lap, smiling widely)_ “Okay.” _(bites lip)_ “I’ll ask him. I’ll ask him today… sometime today.” _(bites lip, peeks through his eyelashes at LIAM_ ) “And I’m sorry about Danielle.”

**LIAM:** “I still hate you for that. Do you know how pissed off Niall was yesterday? He kept saying that I’m still into her and I’m just using him but I told him that it was just a dare and it’s him I love. But no matter what I said or did he still wouldn’t have sex with me.”

**HARRY:** _(winks)_ “Horny, Liam?”

**LIAM:** _(blushes)_ “Shut up.” _(nibbles on his bottom lip, fingers shuffling on his lap)_ “Do-do you think she still likes me?”

**HARRY:** “Yes she does. I can see it in both of you, no matter how mad she is as you she still loves you because hey, you were her first love and you, being an idiot, still love her as well and I don’t know why you’re with Niall right now when you don’t even like him.”

**LIAM:** “I do.”

**HARRY:** “You’re not in love with him. You’re in love with the thought of him.”

**LIAM:** _(shakes his head)_ “Are not. I love Niall to the moon and back, I’d walk through the desert for him, I would walk down the isle, I would swim across the oceans just to see him smile, whatever it takes it’s fine.”

**HARRY:** “You dipsh!t! That’s from our song _Stand Up_! Stop quoting lyrics like an idiot, say what’s from the heart.”

**LIAM:** _(abruptly)_ “I love her.” _(slams hands over his mouth, eyes wide open)_

**HARRY:** _(cheekily smiles)_ “I knew it.”

**LIAM:** _(fretfully)_ “Please don’t tell Niall. He can’t know. He absolutely cannot know about me liking Danielle. He can’t…” _(as if dazed)_ “He can’t.”

**HARRY:** “Why not?”

**LIAM:** “Because he really loves me, like he looks at me like I’m the sun or something.” _(HARRY looks perplexed)_ “I took his virginity, I lied to him that I’m also gay but I don’t think I am, I promised him we’d come out after this trip.” _(sighs)_ “I don’t know how to tell him because time is running out.”

**HARRY:** _(breathes out smoke through his nose)_ “It’s not fair that you’re dragging him along when you don’t even like him. I know Niall probably more than anyone and he may seem carefree and whatever all the time but he deeply cares and when he loves, like really loves, he moves mountains with his love while you, Payne, you move houses only.”

**LIAM:** “We all moved into his house, not just me. You know Danielle replied?” _(HARRY’s eyes open widely)_ “Yeah she texted Zayn saying good morning with a smiley face.”

**HARRY:** “Maybe that was for Zayn.”

**LIAM:** “Are you an idiot? It was for me and I don’t know what to reply. Oh by the way, I didn’t tell Niall. Told Zayn not to tell him, and I don’t know what to reply back. How do you reply back with a smiley face? A smiley face with the letter D?”

**HARRY:** “What?”

**LIAM:** “Or a winky face with a D? But she might think I like her… I have to keep it friendly… I could text her good afternoon with a winky D smiley face. Is that desperate?”

**HARRY:** “Again, what?”

**LIAM:** “Yeah I’ll do that.”

**HARRY:** _(sips his coffee)_ “Somebody help me.”

**LIAM:** “Or a smiley face with the tongue thingy… Yeah, that’s more playful and more like her.”

**HARRY:** “Seriously? Are you wondering what smiley face to use?”

**LIAM:** “I don’t want to seem desperate or anything. And stop blowing smoke in my face!”

**HARRY:** “Scared of second hand smoke?”

**LIAM:** “Yes I am but I guess now it’s no use because you’ve smoked like 4 cigarettes already which probably means I’ve smoked four as well.”

**HARRY:** “Zayn told me you do weed with him!”

**LIAM:** “Weed is better than cigarettes. It’s healthier.”

**HARRY:** “And disgusting! Not to forget smelly.”

**LIAM:** “Cigarettes kill you.”

**HARRY:** _(heaving loudly)_ “What are you going to do about Niall?”

**LIAM:** “I don’t know. I’ll figure it out soon. Don’t worry. And please don’t tell him.” _(waves finger between them both)_ “Don’t tell him anything about this conversation.”

**HARRY:** “I won’t, I won’t but Niall’s going to have a meltdown. Like probably even die because you’ll break his heart.” _(LIAM pops his eyes out)_ “And I mean it.” _(LIAM’s drops his mouth)_ “He’ll flip sh!t balls over this.” _(groans)_ “Maybe this is why Simon told me that dating within the band was a bad idea.”

**LIAM:** _(confused)_ “You talked to Simon about dating? When?”

**HARRY:** _(shakes his head)_ “This isn’t about me, this is about you. You need to tell Niall how you feel, gently though because he’s like a baby at heart. And as for me I need to talk Louis.”

**LIAM:** _(cheering)_ “Yeah, go ask him! Now would be awesome.”

**HARRY:** “But not now. We’re so screwed, both of us.” _(LIAM smiles, scratching his head)_ “This is why I always think Zayn is lucky, no relationship issues.” _(LIAM gives him a ‘are you joking?’ look)_ “Much.” _(looks at the almost empty breakfast tray)_ “Maybe we should order more breakfast because…” _(holds up a waffle dripping with chocolate syrup and shakes it)_ “…I am loving this.”

**LIAM:** _(rummages through the breakfast tray)_ “Did you finish all the waffles?” _(looks up at HARRY)_ “When did you finish them?”

**HARRY:** “When you were talking about Louis being an angry jit.”

**LIAM:** _(groans and leans back in the bathtub)_ “Great, now all we have is coffee.”

**HARRY:** _(sips last drop of coffee and shakes the cup)_ “I think that’s over too.”

**LIAM:** _(getting out of bathtub)_ “I give up. On you and life too. You call room service now.” _(walks out of the bathroom)_

**HARRY:** _(grabbing the phone off the bathroom counter)_ “On it.”

**Scene 2**

** **

_**(LOUIS, NIALL and ZAYN are in ZAYN’s hotel room. LOUIS and ZAYN are lying on the bed, NIALL is out on the balcony snorting cocaine)** _

**LOUIS:** “Honestly I don’t know what happened. I just couldn’t say yes. Yes. It’s a weird word, isn’t it, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees. Yes. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasss. Yes.”

**NIALL:** _(loudly from the balcony)_ “Shut up Louis!”

**ZAYN:** “But you like him right?”

**NIALL:** “Loves, Zayn, loves.”

**LOUIS:** _(nodding)_ “Yes.”

**ZAYN:** “I don’t get it then, I thought in gay relationships when one asks the other to be their boyfriend one says yes?”

**NIALL:** “They do. Louis is just an idiot.”

**LOUIS:** “I wanted to say yes. The word was on the tip of my tongue, it really was but my legs were faster than my tongue so I ran. I ran as fast as I could.”

**ZAYN:** “Why did you run?”

**LOUIS:** _(plays with his fingers, shrugs)_ “I needed some exercise.”

**NIALL:** _(perplexed)_ “What?”

**LOUIS:** “Yeah, I haven’t been exercising for a long time, y’know, looking for Harry and all makes you forget about going to the gym, eating right, uh…” _(loses track)_

**ZAYN:** _(sternly)_ “Louis.”

**LOUIS:** _(groans)_ “I’m… I… I’m scared of being openly gay.”

**NIALL:** “That’s not a good enough reason to say ‘No’ to Harry.”

**LOUIS:** “It is!”

**ZAYN:** “And you are openly gay! You came out through a Twitcam which Modest! was shocked about when it happened.”

**NIALL:** “Oh yeah, I remember Jill shouting, “Stop coming out through cameras” and Liam was like, “People don’t come out through cameras, they come out through…”

**ZAYN:** _(interrupts, mildly giggling)_ “Closets!” _(NIALL laughs loudly with ZAYN, LOUIS stares at them)_ “Sorry Louis, continue.”

**LOUIS:** _(sits up on the bed like a pretzel)_ “Technically I didn’t reply to Harry but… but I’ve never done this whole gay thing. I mean you don’t understand how it is being gay, Zayn and then being gay in a relationship, they’re completely different things.” _(NIALL nods)_

**ZAYN:** “It’s almost the same thing I’m sure.”

**NIALL:** “Who’s the gay one again? Oh right, not you.”

**LOUIS:** “Being gay is usually the hard part.” _(low voice)_ “At first.” _(sits up comfortably on the bed)_ “Coming out is like walking into a warzone without a gun. You don’t know who’s going to kill you but you know you’ll die because of being an open gay man and in this world that we live in we have homophobes who are dead set on hating you because you apparently decided not to love the gender you’re required.”

**ZAYN:** _(interrupts)_ “But you’re meant to love a girl Louis, not a male. It’s in the Bible!”

**LOUIS:** _(points at ZAYN with index finger)_ “This is the reason I don’t want to date Harry publicly. People like you will always say something negative about who we are. You’re the reason gay people remain in the closet. Actually, if you weren’t so homophobic then we wouldn’t need a damn closet to stay in. We wouldn’t need to tell you guys…” _(imitates a voice)_ “‘Oh hey, I’m coming out of the closet.’ You’ve reduced people’s lives into furniture. Furniture Zayn, furniture.”

**NIALL:** “Preach!”

**LOUIS:** “I don’t know whether it’s a blessing or a curse but I must live with it. Live with this…” _(waves arm frantically in the air)_ “…gayness.”

**NIALL:** “This is what Harry was talking about.”

**ZAYN:** “Talking about what?”

**NIALL:** “He called being gay a monster. He described it as being locked in a hot furnace which I’m guessing is the closet and the fire burns every single inch of your skin until it can’t burn anymore.” _(melancholy)_ “And when you think it can’t burn anything else because there’s no more skin, it starts burning your bones that you even start to hear the crunch noise of your bones burning beneath.”

**ZAYN:** _(horrified)_ “Why would he describe being gay as terrible as that?”

**LOUIS:** _(loudly)_ “It’s people like you that make us feel like that.” _(lowers voice)_ “It’s because being gay eats you up like cancer and it keeps you up all night.” _(giggles with NIALL, ZAYN smiles)._ “You know how it grows and grows, this stupid, stupid cancer? It feeds on your struggle, your hate for your own self because of who you are. It feeds on the fact that you can’t come out, the fact that you’re gay, the fact that–”

**NIALL:** _(interrupts)_ “Basically trapped in stupid furniture.” _(LOUIS nods)_

**ZAYN:** _(defensive)_ “Stop bashing me with your gay frustrations of being in a closet and whatnot and continue your story on why you said no to Harry.”

**LOUIS:** “I fell in love.”

**ZAYN:** “What does that have to do with you saying no?”

**LOUIS:** “It’s a long story and I need to say it from the beginning.”

**NIALL:** “Oh no, here we go again. We’re never gonna get to the end are we Zayn?” _(ZAYN shakes his head but smiles at LOUIS urging him to continue)_ “You aren’t Romeo and Juliet Louis.”

**LOUIS:** “So like I said before, I fell in love. Gloriously in love with a boy who I didn’t exactly like because I didn’t share his views on love. I didn’t think it was proper because two guys kissing?” _(forced laughter)_ “Absolutely not! Eugh, It’s disgusting, immoral and downright revolting!”

**ZAYN:** _(strongly)_ “Exactly.”

**LOUIS:** “But then I was wrong. I was totally wrong.”

**ZAYN:** “Because you became gay! You became what you said you never would.”

**LOUIS:** “And I don’t regret it. Maybe this is who I am. Maybe I was born this way, maybe I wasn’t.” _(ZAYN slightly nods)_ “But either way, this is who I am. I’m not afraid of me being gay, I’m not afraid of me walking down the streets of London and holding Harry’s hand, damned by the looks we get, damned be Modest!, damned be our fans who don’t support us and damned be you.”

**ZAYN:** “No offence taken.”

**NIALL:** “So what’s the issue?”

**LOUIS:** “After coming out and all, you think you’ve completed the hardest part of being gay which is coming out! But no, there’s this huge avalanche coming your way. An avalanche of hate, people who don’t understand you, people who are narrow minded, people who say we’re going to burn in Hell” _(ZAYN nods)_ “Others say that we’re like aliens, we’re disowned by our friends, parents, people who are meant to love us suddenly stop because we don’t have the same values? You don’t love me anymore because I love differently? That’s complete bullshit!”

**ZAYN:** “No it’s not. It’s a sin to love another man if you are a man!”

**LOUIS:** “There’s nothing wrong with whom you love, God made you perfect the way you are because He makes no mistakes.”

**ZAYN:** “He didn’t but you did. You made a mistake.”

**NIALL:** “What mistake?”

**ZAYN:** “The mistake of falling in love with Harry. You used to be like me; loving girls, blond ones, redheaded ones, ones that look ratchet, others that smell like they’ve been wearing the same thong for years. You used to be like me, not agreeing with gay people on who they like but suddenly when Harry says…” _(imitates HARRY’s voice)_ “…‘I love you Lou’ you immediately change your whole…” _(looks at LOUIS intently)_ “…you… and you start liking men as well?” _(emphasis)_ “Men, Louis, men. Your homophobic views then change and why? Because you’re jealous I could see Harry’s suffering and you couldn’t.”

**LOUIS:** “No! I fell in love because there were times when I did love him, more than a friend even. When we cuddled watching films my heart would literally beat out of my chest when his thighs touched mine.” _(squeals)_ “Or when he would ask me to sleep with him on the bed.” _(breathlessly)_ “It felt so right but wrong at the same time.”

**ZAYN:** “Maybe because it was wrong, Tommo.”

**LOUIS:** _(swipes his hair off his face)_ “But I didn’t know what was happening, I didn’t know what these feelings were and they would leave immediately after but leave me completely confused! And after that I would drive to Manchester and have sex with Eleanor to take the feelings away. And then I talked to Danielle about it and she said that I might be gay!” _(chuckles)_ “You should’ve have seen my face that day, out of all the things I was gay?” _(raises pitch)_ “Friggin’ gay? No way, not me, the Tommo cannot be gay, he just can’t. So that night I texted Niall.”

**ZAYN:** “Is this how it started? You called Niall to your room to kiss each other’s face off to see if you’re gay?”

**NIALL:** “That’s the jist of it.”

**ZAYN:** _(disgusted face)_ “Gross. May the Lord deliver us all from this damnation.”

**NIALL:** “So why did you say ‘No’ to Harry? You’re avoiding that question.”

**LOUIS:** “I’m getting there soon. I’m trying to make Zayn understand that I’m not suddenly in love with Harry just to make him stay!” _(places hand on left breast)_ “I love him genuinely.”

**ZAYN:** _(with loathing)_ “Explain what changed your view from being against gays to being one of them. You literally took the saying ‘If you can’t beat them join them’ seriously.” _(NIALL chuckles)_

**LOUIS:** _(rolls his eyes)_ “Real mature Zayn. Well I did think about it but really there was nothing to think about. I mean God, in general, does love us all because God loves all his children. _(looks intently at ZAYN)_ “No matter if they’re gay or not.”

**NIALL:** Preach!

**ZAYN:** “So your deep epiphany of God loving his children changed your mind about gay people?”

**LOUIS:** “Yes… No. Well a bit of both. Haven’t you wondered why prostitutes, gays, liars, murderers, ra-p!sts, drug dealers, Mafia members…” _(sticks tongue out from his mouth, brows furrow)_ “Uh who else is evil in this world?”

**NIALL:** “People who steal other people’s coffee.”

**ZAYN:** _(twists his body on the bed to face NIALL out on the balcony_ ) “What?”

**NIALL:** “You drank all my coffee!”

**LOUIS:** “Excuse me, I was explaining something!”

**ZAYN:** _(mumbles)_ “Sorry, continue.”

**NIALL** : _(mumbles to himself)_ “Is this never ending?”

**LOUIS:** “Like I was saying, all those people are alive, right? Why though? Why?”

**ZAYN:** “Because God loves them, duh!”

**LOUIS:** “And who am I to judge them?” _(louder)_ “Who am I, Zayn? I mean we’re all sinners, aren’t we? I’m sinner.” _(as if counting with his fingers)_ “I judge people, I lie to them, I had sex before marriage, plenty of times actually. I get drunk a lot, I fight a lot and should probably work on my anger, I sort of idolize money…” _(nervous laughter)_ “… but who doesn’t? I got tattoos up and down my body, I curse too much on a daily basis and guess what? All these are sins according to the Bible Zayn, they’re sins! But what do we both do? We judge homosexuals! Wrongly at that because we’re already sinners and they are too.”

**NIALL:** “Chapter seven verse 41, why do we look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but pay no attention to the log in your own eye?”

**ZAYN:** _(stunned)_ “It reads the Bible?”

**LOUIS:** “You read the Bible?”

**NIALL:** _(looks at ZAYN)_ “I had to when I was trying to figure out who the hell Mr X was!” _(ZAYN sulks)_

**LOUIS:** “Anyway, we wrongly judge gays because we’re already sinners and they are too. So why do we judge them?”

**NIALL:** Preach son!

**ZAYN:** “Of course they are sinners! Their entire life is one big, huge sin!”

**LOUIS:** “I meant as in maybe they stole money that’s why they’re sinners.”

**ZAYN:** “So they’re sinful because they stole money not because they’re gay?”

**LOUIS:** “No, yes, well I don’t… No… Yes. Now I’m confused.”

**NIALL:** “They’re sinful because they stole money Zayn not because they’re gay.”

**ZAYN:** “And because they’re gay.”

**LOUIS:** _(groans)_ “Convincing a homophobe is hard.”

**NIALL:** “You weren’t meant to convince Zayn to love gays because quite frankly that’s gonna need years of therapy to do. You were gonna tell us why you said no to Harry.”

**LOUIS:** “Oh right, where was I?”

**NIALL:** “You’ve told us about being in a closet, coming to terms with your sexuality, your hatred for homophobes, uh, yup that’s where we are. And please hurry…” _(points to the beach)_ “…this beach looks amazing!”

**LOUIS:** “If, just if, I say yes to being Harry’s boyfriend, which obviously I’ll say yes but if I do that means that I’ll be dating him. Publicly!”

**NIALL:** “Part of dating Harry is doing it publicly, duh!”

**ZAYN:** _(smirks)_ “Like you and Liam?”

**NIALL:** _(frowns)_ “He said he’s not ready to be exclusive. Or trying to figure out what he is.”

**ZAYN:** “From here I can see he’s not gay, which I still can’t believe you can’t see.” _(turns to LOUIS)_ “But as for you, you are though I still don’t understand what’s wrong with dating Harry. Publicly as you put it.”

**LOUIS:** “It’s the whole thing of being gay! Do you know how awkward it is to date a guy after dating Eleanor? I mean, a guy! A man. A male. People with their judgmental faces will be looking and staring as I hold Harry’s hand in the streets or even kiss him!

**ZAYN:** _(furrow eyebrows)_ “You’re scared of what people will think?” _(LOUIS nods shyly)_ “But you’re Tommo! The Tommo.” _(NIALL smiles)_ “The non-caring Louis who dates whoever he wants damned be what people think.” _(quietly)_ “You did that with Eleanor anyway. When she used you for fame, when she would ask you to drop anything you were doing and immediately tend to the spider in her room.”

**LOUIS:** “It was a really huge spider!”

**NIALL:** _(shakes head)_ “To be honest, I thought he wouldn’t go but he actually did.”

**ZAYN:** “Innit crazy?”

**LOUIS:** “Eleanor was, ugh, I’m not doing this again. I’ve talked about my ex-girlfriend too much that I’m not gonna talk about her again.” (slightly annoyed) “I’d rather talk about Harry, thank you very much.”

**NIALL:** _(groans, comes into the room and plops on the bed, his head on ZAYN’s stomach)_ “Please, please get to the end of your story I’m getting tired. Plus I saw Liam and Harry at the beach.”

**ZAYN:** “We all want to go.” _(looks up at LOUIS)_ “Please get to the end of this confession.”

**LOUIS:** “Fine. Thanks guys, I thought you were my best friends who would listen to whatever I have to say. I thought I would bare my heart to you--”

**NIALL:** _(interrupts)_ “If it’s for three hours and 47 minutes, I don’t think so!”

**LOUIS:** _(gives up)_ “I’m scared that people will be mean to me and Harry because we’re gay and dating. Publicly.”

**NIALL:** “If you’re scared of homophobes, you’ve got one right here.” _(pokes ZAYN’s belly)_

**ZAYN:** “Exactly! I’ll tease you, insult you, preach to you about the yucky yucky of being gay and whatnot, so don’t worry about the outside world.”

**LOUIS:** _(sarcastic)_ “Thanks Zayn, what a friend I have in you.”

**ZAYN:** “No, what a friend we have in Jesus, amirite?” (NIALL rolls his eyes) “Amirite ladies?

**NIALL:** _(pulls off self on ZAYN, walking to the bathroom)_ “That’s it, I’m going to the beach with my boyfriend.” _(locks eyes with ZAYN)_ “My very queer, gay boyfriend.”

**ZAYN:** He’s not gay Ni.

**LOUIS:** “Help me Niall, help me. Or you, Zayn because you apparently see everything in everybody.”

**ZAYN:** _(sits up on the bed and turns to LOUIS)_ “You need to tell Harry your fears because truly I believe he’ll understand where you’re coming from. I mean, he got a lot of hate from us when he was in the closet but he’s much stronger now. He’ll be there for you when people hurl insults at you, he won’t leave you which is what you’re afraid of. Your family still loves you despite you being gay, Eleanor still cares about you even though you don’t, Danielle is practically your BFF now and she love you, we still care about you.” _(LOUIS gives him a look)_ “I know, I know it may seem like a lot of talk right now from me but I’m getting my head around you being gay and me being grossed out by your new lifestyle… I’m working on it! But you have Niall, Liam and Harry who are better than me with you being gay.” _(smiles)_ “And don’t forget Larry shippers.”

**LOUIS:** _(weak, playing with his fingers)_ “Are you sure Harry won’t dump me when people say that we’re gross together?”

**ZAYN:** _(lowers his eyes, pulling the bed cover slightly)_ “I can’t promise you that but it’ll get better, it will. Just tell Harry what you feel and he’ll understand. He always does.”

**LOUIS:** _(nods)_ “Okay.”

**ZAYN:** _(claps once with his hands)_ “Okay let’s go to the beach.” _(LOUIS shakes his head)_ “Why not? It’s beautiful out!”

**NIALL:** _(comes from the bathroom, clad in swim shorts and blue towel draped over his bare shoulder)_ “And we only have four more days here, so c’mon Lou!”

**LOUIS:** “Harry is out there on the beach I don’t want to see him. It’ll be really awkward.”

**ZAYN:** “You and I could go to the East side of the beach where Harry won’t be there.”

**LOUIS:** “Are you sure?”

**NIALL:** “Sorry to say this but you’re bumming everyone out right now.” _(LOUIS scowls)_ “So please let’s go!”

**ZAYN:** “Yep, he won’t be there. Now c’mon.”

**LOUIS:** _(smiles, getting off the bed)_ “Okay. We can build sand castles, yeah?”

**ZAYN:** _(smiles, hugs LOUIS)_ “For sure Tommo. Anything you want.”

**LOUIS:** “I want sand castles.” _(NIALL furrows his brows, eyeing them like little children)_ “I could build one like where Beast lived.”

**ZAYN:** _(grabbing a towel and sunscreen from the closet_ ) “Or where Cinderella went for her ball.”

**LOUIS:** _(opening the door, NIALL and ZAYN following him)_ “Or Snow White.”

**ZAYN:** “Not where the dwarfs lived but the castle, right?”

**LOUIS:** “Defo!”

**NIALL:** “You guys are pathetic!” _(smiles more widely)_ “Screw Payno, I’m coming with you lads to build castles!” _(ZAYN and LOUIS man-chee_ r) “Mine’s going to be bigger and better than both of yours.”

**LOUIS:** “Like Barney Stintson would say, challenge accepted!”

**ZAYN:** _(shouts, walking down the hotel corridor)_ “Ahoy!”

**NIALL:** Isn’t that for pirates?”

**ZAYN:** _(ignoring him, chants)_ “Ahoy!”

**LOUIS:** _(joins ZAYN in chanting)_ “Ahoy!”


	23. (glass half full and empty)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zayn puts his OWN glass down.

**//**

 

> _If I tell you the truth, you’ll fight for a lie. If I split my guts, it would make a mess we can’t clean up_ **_~ Bring Me The Horizon_**

**\\\**

A psychologist once talked about the worries of life like that of a glass of water.

She explained: “The absolute weight of the water in the glass doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

Remember to put the glass down.

 

 

“I want to go to the beach,” Louis whines, the five of them sitting near the beach under a sunroof table with cocktail drinks.

“We all do,” Zayn says, his nose touching his paper.

Niall decided it was time to put the glass down for the five of them. They had gone through a lot in the last two years and there was still a lot of it hanging in the air, nobody really talking about it. He wanted all of five of them to be friends again before the On The Road Again Tour started… or before people can break them up, again. So he decided to give each of them a piece of paper and a pen, they write down issues they have with each other and after, they would discuss it amongst them.

“I don’t know how we agreed to this,” Harry wonders, writing down on his paper.

He hoped it would work but moreover he just wanted things to go back to the way things were. Like before. Before Harry boarded on a plane to Sicily. **Before**.

“All done?” Niall asks after they have all scribbled on their paper.

“So how do we do this?” Louis asks.

“We all say what issues we’ve written on our paper with each of us and we tell them how we feel about it, if we want them to change it, what we see if the any of us can’t see it,” Niall explains. “Basically, we clear the air around us. Don’t give me those looks, you know this is true. We need to be friends again before we go on the tour again otherwise the media might poke holes, again. So whom do we begin with?” The four boys look around, waiting for the other to begin but no does. Harry swallows his entire drink in a glass, shaking his ice for the waiter to bring more.

“Okay then, let me start,” Niall says. He reads from his paper: “Why did you frame me Zayn?”

“Uh.”

“Why did you let everybody think I was Mr X?”

“Um,” Zayn mutters but before he can continue, the waiter comes back with Harry’s drink. He has three seconds to think about it. “You were an easy target. Liam was photographed with Sophia so he couldn’t be Mr X nor could Louis because, well, Eleanor was in the picture so it wouldn’t make sense why he would be Mr X and me, well, I was seen shopping with my beautiful fiancé so there was you left. Nobody saw you or heard of you, you didn’t even go on Twitter that day so it was simple. To top it off, I didn’t post your entry from Harry’s diary and BOOM! The entire world thinks it’s you.”

“Wow!” Louis shakes his head in disbelief at how Zayn thought about this. “You really did think about this whole thing didn’t you?”

Niall dismisses Louis’ question and answers himself, “Well thanks a lot, people hated me for like years because they thought I was Mr X but I guess I came out a winner in the end, you’re now the most hated member of One Direction. Ha!”

“Funny.” Zayn slouches back on his wooden-straw chair, the sun scorching his back. “Should’ve brought sunscreen.”

“Next is,” Niall continues reading from his list, “Louis. I have a problem with your anger.” Louis gasps before he continues. “Harry may be back and your anger is on the low but you’re still a pretty angry person and it’s friggin’ us out, especially Payno.”

“I still can’t be in the same room as you Louis because of what you did to Zayn,” Liam confesses, “And seriously Zayn, how can you even be in the same room with Louis? Or sit next to him?”

“Harry’s my defender,” Zayn says, glancing at Harry. He looks nonchalantly at him. “Or not. But I’m fine with it, I deserved it.”

“This isn’t solving the issue. My issue is your anger Louis-”

Louis answers before he could continue, “I am not an angry person. There were a lot of things going on in my life at that moment and I’m sorry I took it out on you, Zayn. I won’t do it again so you don’t need to freak out, Liam. Be cool.”

“Be cool?” Niall questions him. “Be cool? How can I be cool when you ripped off Zayn’s arm with my wine bottle? How? And his scars will never leave!”

“It’ll be a reminder not to be a douche,” Louis says sassily, Harry elbowing him. Louis groans, “What?”

“Stop being mean,” Harry says rubbing Louis’ knuckles with his thumb. “We’re doing this for Niall and then we spend the entire afternoon on the beach together, just a few more hours, yeah?” Louis slides back in his chair, arms crossed across his chest, in silence.

It was Liam’s turn. “I have issues with practically all of you but let’s start with one that affects us all, the tour. On The Road Again Tour to be specific. They e-mailed me saying that we need to write songs and finalize on the final touches of the tour.”

“Can we do that later?” Zayn interrupts. “This feels more like our job kind of thing rather than our relationship with each other. Next Liam.”

“Okay,” Liam nods slowly, skimming through his paper. “Well I had an issue with Louis on his anger, Zayn’s engagement to Perrie but I don’t think that’s something we’re going to solve here and now, with Harry I’m still mad at you for running away and nothing about Niall.”

“That was fast,” Zayn mums, sipping his drink through a straw. “Louis.”

Louis untangles his fingers from Harry and sits up. “I have issues with everyone apart from Harry-”

“I think I should go third,” Zayn interrupts.

“Why?”

“Because I feel like I need to say something before you two” – he point at Harry and Louis – “talk about your issues. And guess what? My first issue is both of you. Is Larry real or not?”

“It is,” Louis answers. He twists his head to Harry who’s already smiling at him, his molars glittering in the sun.

“I meant, are you guys together or not?” They both remain silent, unsaid words seeping through the space between Larry, none of them being uttered. Harry sighs and takes both of Louis’ hands into his.

“Why did you say no to me?”

“I didn’t say no.”

Harry sighs, knowing full well his boyfriend is being difficult. “Why did you run away when I asked you to be my boyfriend?” Louis remains mum, his eyes piercing into Harry’s who’s waiting for a reply. “Well Lou?”

“He has his reasons!” Zayn says.

“What reasons?” Harry asks and quietly adds, “Is it Eleawhore-nor?”

“No,” Niall answers, Louis being tongue-tied. “For once this isn’t about Eleanor. Louis is trying to piece everything together right now, you know, being gay and all.”

“I’m not following.”

“Both of you,” Zayn the wise one of the group speaks, “need to start again. From the beginning. That includes going on dates, stealing cute glances at each other, feeding each other breakfast…”

“I…I’m scared of dating you,” Louis says in a low voice, “publicly. Calling you mine in public, in front of everyone. Holding your hand down the streets of London, or singing songs about us or even kissing you!” Harry furrows his eyebrows but remains mum, waiting for Louis to continue talking. Louis bites his bottom lip in anxiety. “I’m scared of being gay.”

“But you came out to the entire world last year and people loved you for it!”

Louis nods, “Yes but that was the easy part. Now I’m going to date you. Don’t get me wrong I want to date you,” – he heaves a happy sigh – “I’ve waited a long time to be yours but now that it’s happening I… I don’t… I think Zayn is right. We should start again.”

“As long as you want me,” Harry says. “I’ll do whatever it takes to win you over.”

“You already have,” Louis squeals on his chair, holding tightly to Harry’s hands tightly in happiness. “And I’m positive I want to say yes, and I do, I do want to be in a gay relationship with you.”

“Don’t have to add the gay part,” Niall says. He takes a sip of his pineapple-flavored drink. “It’s just called a relationship.”

“My other issue,” Zayn continues reading down his list, “is Niam as the fans like to call you. None of you are sure about what you’re doing.”

“We’re dating,” Liam says.

“Dating? Where? In Narnia?”

“We haven’t fully talked about it yet because there’re some things that we need to talk about,” Liam explains.

“Like how you’re not gay,” Zayn says bluntly. Larry switch their eyes between tomato-faced Niall and downcast Liam.

“I am.”

“You sound unsure,” Zayn says directly to Liam who remains silent, long enough for Niall shifts in his seat to glance at Liam. “Am I right?”

“Is he right?” Niall asks when Liam doesn’t answer. He looks up at Harry who gives him the look of ‘Tell him the truth that you still like Danielle’ and Liam gives him the ‘I’m not ready’ look. Liam turns to Niall, holding his hands and shakes his head. “Zayn’s lying.”

“I’m not lying, you are-”

“Leave it Zayn. Liam likes Niall and if they don’t want to go public with their relationship, leave it,” Harry steps in to defend Liam, knowing that he was adding the weight to the stresses and worries of life in Liam’s glass of water. Zayn looks intensely at Harry making him uncomfortable and squirming a little on Louis’ lap. He lets it go though, not understanding what was going on between Liam and Harry.

“I thought we were talking about issues that we have a problem with not pushing them further down?” Zayn questions the boys.

“We are Zayn and we’ve solved the Niam relationship,” Niall tells him, “now continue reading down your long list.”

“I can’t continue if we’re not saying the truth. Listen Niall, I’m going to tell you something and Liam will deny it for ages on because apparently Harry is on this as well. Liam is not scared to be in a relationship with you. In fact, if he could be in a relationship with you he would in a heartbeat but he can’t.”

Niall questions, “What do you mean ‘can’t’?” Liam tries profusely to stop Zayn from talking, as Harry tries to begin reading from his list and Louis is confused with what’s happening right now.

“He’s not gay,” Zayn states.

“I am Zayn. I am as gay as the next person.” And Liam jumps forward in his chair, holding Niall’s face cupped in his hands and smashes his lips to his, kissing him vigorously, Niall holding him tightly by the waist.

“This doesn’t mean you’re gay,” Zayn says above the sounds of kissing between the British and South African lovers.

“Looks pretty gay to me,” Louis shrugs. “And romantic.” Harry smiles down at him and kisses his temple. “Why are you so negative about Niall and Liam in a relationship? Is this your homophobia coming out?”

“No, this is me being me,” Zayn says, frustrated a bit. It got right under his skin that whenever he voiced his opinion it would always link back to him being a homophobic. Sometimes it wasn’t that, sometimes it was him being himself – seeing the truth when people couldn’t see it. “All of you have change blindness so I don’t blame you.”

“Change what?” Louis wonders.

“Change blindness.”

“What is that?”

“It’s when you see what you want to see so you end up not seeing the big picture.”

Harry hits Zayn’s chair with his foot, falling him over to the ground near Niam rubbing each other’s faces off. “Stop being Zayn right now. Let them be. When all of this goes down badly you get to say I told you so, okay?”

“I always get to say that,” Zayn sighs sadly. “But nobody listens to me.”

“We do.”

“No we don’t,” Louis shakes his head. Harry elbows his stomach. “What? But it’s true. Ever since he was Mr X…”

“Since we’re talking, my issue is with you being Mr X,” Harry says, watching Zayn’s face dejected. “I was angry with you for being Mr X, was angry with you forcing me to be gay, to tell the world my big secret and for Louis’ to know which was really scary for me. I know Niall begged you not to tell but you didn’t listen. I was mad, pissed off and to be honest, the first few months I was planning many ways in which I murdered you and then I hear that Louis almost killed you? With a wine bottle?”

“I’m still not apologizing,” Louis says.

“Then I stopped imagining ways to kill you because I knew that you meant well. I mean, you always want people to be free, to live happy and we deserve to be happy what with the stress and worries of being multimillionaires, we have to let go. It took time, yes, but I forgive you for that. But next time you pull this stunt Zayn, I will let Louis personally finish you off.”

“Yes,” Louis cheers deeply, Zayn smiling at Harry’s sinister smile. He shakes his head and gives up on the Niam issue, letting nature sets its course.

“I love you so much,” Niall says, the three lads turning to Niam – cupping Liam’s cheeks fondly. “I love you so much. I..”

“I know,” Liam fondly replies, his hands settling on Niall’s thighs. “I love you more if that’s even possible. You’re pure perfection in my eyes, you’re everything that I see and I don’t know who else… or what else I want in my life since you’re my everything babe.”

“And you… mine.”

“How long will you love me?”

“For as long as you want.”

“Really?”

“I gave you my virginity because I was sure you’re the one for me, I bore down my past down for you, you understand my addiction to coke and you’re helping me… thank you and with each passing hour I fall more and more” – he kisses his lips – “in love with you and I love the ride. So to answer your question, as long as the stars are above you Payno, and longer because I want you to be mine for the longest time possible.”

“For infinity?”

“Let’s start with forever,” Niall muses, leaning forward to his purled lips.

“Beurk!” Zayn gags. “Please get a room!”

“Jelous Zaynie?” Niall grins.

“My next issue is your baby Harry but right now I don’t really care about your baby because you seem to have it under control-”

“Please let’s not talk about Baby Edward,” Harry pleads. “It’s a touchy subject for me and please let’s not talk about it now, or ever.”

“Which is why I moved on. My next issue is Caroline.”

“We all have an issue with you and Caroline,” Liam tells Harry who shifts uncomfortably around Louis’ lap. “We read your diary entry and I’m sorry she drugged you, I’m sorry she did to you what she did and most of all I’m sorry you didn’t think you could tell us. To be honest, I wish King beat the hell out of Caroline-”

“Drop it,” Harry tells Liam sternly, shooting daggers at him.

“No,” Niall joins in with Liam. “You were ra-ped by her, Harry and even to this day you still think that that was love when it wasn’t. Not the slightest. That isn’t what love is – being drugged and having sex twenty-four seven. Love is—”

“Drop. It.” Harry grips the arm chair, Louis getting worried for Harry. He holds Harry down when he attempts to stand up, looking like he wants to punch Niall in the face, and wraps his arms around him. “I swear if you keep talking I will—”

“You will what?” Liam asks.

“Listen this was my issue that I brought up so let me speak about it,” Zayn begins. He sighs, looking at Harry who was about to probably murder everyone at the table. “What Caroline did to you was not an act of love but because you were head over heels over her you thought you two were making love that night. She drugged you, she played you and she used you but really, in all honesty, she actually did. She did use you. You thought that was love because of what happened before in your life but it isn’t and you’re letting that ruin—”

“Ruin what?” Harry says, anger seething through his pores.

“Zayn stop it!” Louis cries.

“It’s enough Zayn, stop it,” Niall says looking at angry Harry.

“Let Caroline go to jail, let her remain there and think about the sins she committed… to you,” he says. Unlucky for him, Harry had had enough already and pounced for Zayn, surprise from the three boys erupting. Louis held him down – little as he was – stopping him from going at Zayn, here and now under the hot sun of Honolulu. “You know what I’m saying is true. You may not realize this but I mean well, like how I’ve always meant well.”

“Oh yeah you did!” Harry spits, being held back my Louis physically. “Like exposing my life to the entire world?”

Zayn defends himself. “I was saving you from your life.”

“What life? I had none before you posted my entries, when you posted them and now. My life was over the moment you leaked my entries. Actually, leaked means accidental. You did that on purpose.”

He charges for Zayn, his fist millimeters from Zayn’s left eye but is pulled back by Louis.

“I was helping you to come out of the closet. And hopefully quit drinking and smoking all the time.”

“Well surprise surprise, I’m still an alcoholic with a raging addiction to drugs and sex. The boy band life, huh?”

“Harry please stop!” Louis pleads, whispering into his ear. He tries holding him by his waist from the back but it seems Harry gained superhuman strength.

“No,” Harry growls. “I’m not going to stop. I forgave you for making me coming out of the closet before I was even close to ready. It took everything to forgive you but now? You talking smack about Caroline? And Baby Edward? No! I will never forgive you for that because no matter what any of you think Caroline and I had, I will always love her. Always.”

“She raped you and abused you!”

“Zayn cut it!” Liam warns him. He calmly touches his shoulder. “Please.”

“Fine but I’m not staying with a bunch of liars!” Zayn gives in, scratching the chair against the cement ground, standing up. “What Niall started here was really good. It was meant to clear the air and I really thought that’s what it would be. But no matter what happens from now on, we, the five of us, will never be the same. I will forever be the outsider to all of you.”

“What are you on about?” Niall wonders, the four lads drawing their full attention to Zayn who is talking

“I regret posting entries to Harry’s diary because this is not what I thought would happen. I thought we would be happy and all but even the most perfectly laid out plans turn out to be rubbish in the end. Harry would know, he planned on running away but came back. This whole Mr X thing blew up in my face and now the entire world hates me for it. Even you lads, my own brothers. You may deny it but I can tell that none of you like me the way you did before. You tolerate me now, and I’m sorry for doing what I did but I meant well and I know you understand that Harry” – he slightly nods –“but nobody else does. Not Louis, not Niall, not Liam not my best friend, not my family, not our fans… not even Perrie.”

He composes himself, drowning down Harry’s scotch in a gulp. He slams down the glass on the table, wiping some of it off his mouth. “And I don’t know how long we’ll be together, as a band, but I hope it won’t be long because I don’t know how long I can be around fake people anymore.”

 

 

And the glass, finally, was put down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! CHILL ZAYN !!! 
> 
> one more chapter to go fellas .... THEN ONTO THE THIRD BOOK where trust me, it will be filled with LARRY LARRY LARRY everywhere [:


	24. (finale)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adieu, Niall James Horan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first half of this chapter is important as it will play a HUGE role in the sequel [-bulletprxxf lxve-].

**_//_ **

 

 

> _Should’ve known from the start it was already over, we were just too dumb to notice. And we prayed, even love couldn’t save us and either way we would lose **~ T.I**_

**\\\**

** **

The boys had taken a flight back days after, the tension between the five of them even worse than Niall had imagined it would go, if that was even possible. As soon as they touched down at Heathrow Airport at midnight, they each walked their own way:

\--Zayn immediately got into a taxi, avoiding fans at the airport, and told the taxi driver to drive as fast as he could to any bar that was within a five kilometer radius which made everyone wonder why he wasn’t going to see his fiancé.

\--Liam went home by himself, taking a thousand and three pictures with the fans crowding at the airport, to break the news to Sophia that they were over and he was dating Niall but he still didn’t tell the world Niam was together.

\--Niall thus headed home alone. But he was fine, this wasn’t out of the ordinary; he was dating Liam, Liam confessed that he loved him, and technically they were together but it didn’t matter because he was sure Liam was _the one_ for him… he was gutted that he couldn’t share this happiness with the world. So he did a twitcam to the fans to pass time before his 4 o’clock BBQ.

And Harry?

Or Louis?

Harry **and** Louis went home together to their new house up in London. The old one was filled with regret and misery that they couldn’t possibly go back. They need to start some place new, just like their relationship was going to. From the beginning.

 

 

As each of the boys were getting to sleep in their own places, parked outside was a black Bentley looking at Zayn’s lit house. The persons inside the house were being monitored by the Bentley, watching shadows move about in the house behind loose curtains – one was raising their hands, the other staggering about.

“Wonder what they’re fighting about?” one of the passengers in the car says.

“It doesn’t matter, we’re here for one thing only,” an old, bearded man says. Another opens the door and shuts it. “Well?”

“I’ve installed the 32 cameras inside Zayn’s house, Sir, without anyone noticing me, we’re good.”

“Perfect!” Sir glees, “Good work Chuck.”

A woman’s voice – with a heavy Cheshire accent – laughed flawlessly from the back of the car. “You’re exquisite, Sir. This is going to go perfectly like Edwards’s murder with the drugs.”

The man at the front reached out his hand, the woman squeezing it tightly. “We outdid ourselves, didn’t we _mon amour_?”

“Yes we did, _Cherie_ ,” she coos.

“So now all we do is wait,” Shotgun [yes, that’s his name] says, “And then we decide when to kill him… and his circle of friends which includes Niall, Liam, Louis and your brother Harry.”

“Perfect,” Georgia smiles.

“Let’s go home _Cherie_.” The man lovingly kisses her on her red cheeks.

 

 

To say the truth, Liam did go to Sophia to break up with her but that was not the only person he was going to break up with.

Niall asks. “What are you saying Li?”

Liam had thought about what Zayn had said when they were in Honolulu, that he wasn’t gay, he didn’t love Niall as much as he did and also about what Harry told him, not to hurt Niall because he would crumble if they ever broke it off. He was in a Catch 22 situation and he hoped he didn’t have to do this but he couldn’t keep living a lie.

“We have to end this,” Liam tells him, studying Niall closely who’s sitting down. “This relationship, it’s over.”

Some relationships they just don’t work out; you fall in too deep, too fast, you get confused and then before you know it, somebody is leaving… But it’s not _you_.

“Why… I thought you love me?” Niall asks confused.

“I did,” Liam answers and then quietly, “I thought I did. Honestly, what we had in Hawaii was… purely amazing, perfect and if I could turn back time I would. You were perfect, both of us were in this bubble of bliss I felt—”

Niall finishes his sentence, his throat dying up. “…like Zayn was telling the truth?”

“No, it’s not Zayn,” Liam shakes his head. “It’s you. You’re a coke addict, Niall. You’re spiraling out fast and I can’t help you with that, only you can. Your laugh is too loud and annoying that’s why I stopped making you laugh because I don’t want to hear it.”

“You’re dumping me because I have a loud laugh?” Niall asks, confused.

“No, of course not Niall, that would be dumb.”

“Then because I’m a drug addict?”

“Yes… no,” Liam says, confused. His head is in jumbles, his words swimming inside his brain. “Well a tiny bit.”

“So what is it?”

“You’re too Irish.”

“I’m not even Irish Liam, I’m South African,” Niall says, confusion written all over his face.

Liam shouts, “Because you look like Justin Bieber! I don’t like him. He looks like a 12 year old and I want to date a… date a man not a boy.”

Niall sighs, getting off the chair and walking over to Liam. “What’s wrong Liam? Is this because of what Zayn said in Honolulu about us being together?” He holds his hands into his, his thumb grazing Liam’s knuckles. “I know why we can’t be together: it’s because we’re not ready to tell the world about our relationship. I mean look at Harry and Louis. Not everyone is accepting of their relationship but they still have each other and that’s all that matters. That’s why we matter. You accepted me for being me – a South African, coke addict with a slight obsession with Justin. He’s amazing you’ve got to agree but I digress. What Zayn said is stupid and not true–”

“Except it sort of is.”

“Sort of? But I… I love you.”

“I…”

“I love you so much Liam,” Niall says really quickly, batting away his tears welling up in his eyes. He felt that Liam was on the verge of breaking up with him and he was fighting for their [dying] relationship. “I really do. I’ll stop snorting coke, I’ll stop obsessing over Justin, heck, I’ll even unfollow him on Twitter and Instagram and not go to his birthday party ever again.”

“This wasn’t meant to happen,” Liam begins, groaning loudly as well. He walks a step away from him, rubbing his hands over his head down to his chin. “This wasn’t meant to happen. Us. We weren’t meant to be together at all. It was an accident. A happy accident that I wish never happened.”

“Am I not good enough for you?”

“How could you say that?”

“All those sweet things you told me. What happened when you told me that we’d be together before we hit the road again for our tour? Or when I gave you my virginity? Or when we spent that night at our hotel room? Or even when you told me that you loved me when we made love on the beach in Hawaii? Was all of that a lie? Was it?”

Niall’s voice rose and rose with each question, his face red as a tomato laced with salty, hot tears over a broken heart. Liam tried to console him by holding him but Niall shook his head, shouting even louder at him for being a pig – a heartless pig!

“It was Danielle I said that too not you!” Liam says abruptly immediately regretting the words out of his mouth.

“Danielle? Your ex-girlfriend-that-you-cheated-on Danielle?”

“I still love her. I’ve been thinking about her this entire time. Heck even when I was with Sophia, she was the one who I thinking of but ever since Harry told me that Danielle loves me too, I felt that I could make this right. I could make it up to her and get back with her again, just like before.

“Before we dated. Before I gave my all to you. Before we were even together.” And Niall loses it. He drops to the floor and bawls his feelings out. “I… loved you so much and here I was an idiot thinking that you loved me as well but you weren’t even gay!”

“I did love you.”

“You were in love with Danielle you shitface moron pig! Your heart beats for her not mine. And you know why? Because she’s a girl! It all makes sense now. It all does. You love her because she’s a girl… because she’s a _girl_ Li-fucking-am.”

Liam bites his lip, slightly nodding. Niall continues after Liam doesn’t speak during the silence. “You’re just like Zayn, you don’t like gay people. Gay people scare you. But no, you’re worse than Zayn. You pretend to be gay and yet you act like you are one. Oh wow Liam, such the hypocrite. And then you pretend to be gay in a relationship with me, full well knowing that I love you. I gave my all to you because all of me, every fibre in me, organ, blood, words, thoughts, bones, heart and soul loved you. Everything I ever did and said was all for you. I loved you so much but all you thought about was having sex with a girl. A girl. If I was a girl—”

“Then maybe I would love you,” Liam says, again, regretting the words that flew out of his mouth. Niall shakes his head, rubbing furiously the tears out of his eyes. He storms into the kitchen, Liam apologizing and watching Niall drown his sorrows in a black, shiny, French bottle – for a long time, he thinks.

“Leave,” Niall says sternly. He takes another gulp. “Leave me alone!”

“What? No, I can’t. I will not.”

“I don’t need you in my life anymore. I hate you and I want you out of it,” Niall growls at him, “ _now!_ ”

“…I…”

“Go!”

“Goodbye Niall. I hope that this break up doesn’t break you,” Liam says, worry lines forming on his forehead.

“You suddenly care? I thought you hate gay people.”

“This isn’t about me, it’s about you. I’m worried about you, honestly Niall. I know if I say that I love you that you won’t believe me but I do. I care about you because you are the closest person I am to in the band.”

“Big talk from my least favorite homophobe.” Niall pops another bottle and chugs down its contents, white crystal spilling down his shirt. “Alcohol tastes really good. It tastes like betrayal.”

“I know you’re angry with me but don’t drown your sorrow in alcohol,” Liam says sympathetically.

“Oh right, I’ll just snort my coke that you hate so much.”

“Go clubbing, get a guy and…”

“And what? Forget about you?” Niall spits out. “I’m so pathetic that I’d rather have drunken sex with you right now than with some random person I met at a bar.”

“Niall please,” Liam pleads to Niall. Niall on the other hand is empty the contents of vodka in his kitchen, Liam wondering how much alcohol he had stored in his cabinets, and he can barely move his body to stop him. This was his fault, Liam slaps himself. He did this to Niall! And all he could do was watch his ex-boyfriend crumble right before his eyes.

Worried Liam tells him, “Please don’t do this to yourself.”

“I thought you were leaving!”

“Baby, I…”

“GET OUT OF MY LIFE LIAM JAMES FUCKING PAYNE!”

Liam scurries out, before stealing a glance at Niall and shuts the door behind him. He probably should not have left but Niall was holding a broken bottle at him and he didn’t want to have bruises across his arms like Zayn. He dials Tom’s number and they agree to meet at his place [he couldn’t call Andy because he was at his girlfriend’s house and Andy’s girlfriend’s sister is Sophia hashtag awkward]. Niall on the other hand was crying into his bottle, crying for Liam to come back.

“Come back Liam,” Niall tells no one. “You said we’d be together forever… for infinity. You said you’d love me as long as the stars were in the sky” – he looks into the night sky – “but guess what? Those are stars over there and we’re not together.”

He groans, getting up, dizziness hitting him like a bad wave. “Ow!” He falls back on the ground in the dark alley his drunken body took him after Liam left his house four hours ago. “I’m so dizzy I need to sit I guess.”

He sits down, wishing he had another bag of coke right now. He sighs loudly in the dark alley, watching cars drive under the street lights. “I wish I was Danielle. Actually no, I wish I was a girl named Nialleter or whatever so that you could love me. Hmm, I could have a sex change maybe. I’d become a girl, tall, dark haired girl with big boobs… that is Liam’s type.”

“What is Liam’s type?”

Niall doesn’t even bother to turn his head to see where the deep, manly voice belonging to a former Mafia member belongs to. Niall answers his question, “A girl, apparently.”

 

On the other side of London, in a safer place, Larry Stylinson have moved into their new home. They cuddle on the couch watching _Love Actually_ (for the 7th time since they got back from Honolulu), Harry’s arms wrapped around Louis’ tiny body.

“Sometimes I don’t know how I say yes to watching this movie again,” Louis said, a warm cuppa warming his fingers. He snuggled his head back farther into Harry’s warm neck. “Or maybe it’s because you convinced me with hot chocolate?”

“Hot chocolate and a beautiful hand job does wonders, right love?” Harry whispered to his ear.

“You do have a talent with your hand,” Louis purred into Harry’s ear, making him shiver. “Would you like to try out your talent on me… again?”

“I’d love to,” Harry smirked. “Remember that we are meant to start again, right?” Louis pouted at his comment. “But we need to start our relationship all over again and I don’t think blowing each other sends that message.”

Louis protested, “There’re couples who give each other massive blow jobs on the first date!”

“Yes and those are thots. You are a classy boyfriend and I love you for that. We’ll have plenty of blowjobs in the future.”

“And sex?”

“Yes,” Harry replied, smooching Louis’ rosy lips. “As much as you want but for now we cuddle and… answer Liam’s phone call.”

“Liam doesn’t need you now,” Louis huffed.

“Hi Liam,” smiles Harry to his phone on loudspeaker.

_Hi Harry, I know you’re with Louis so that’s good._

“What’s wrong Liam?” Harry asked, sitting up, “you sound worried. What happened?”

_I finally did it Harry. I followed your advice to tell Niall the truth but I fear it may be worse than you think. And now I don’t know where he is right now and I’m worried. Zayn turned off his phone and then you’re with Louis so I wanted to ask if you’ve seen Niall?_

“Um, no we haven’t seen or heard from him. Did you really dump him?” Harry asked, shocked beyond belief. He saw this coming, the day Liam and Niall would break up and he knew this was going to happen.

_Yes I did and I’m worried. He kicked me out of his house when I told him and he was drinking so much vodka it was scaring me._

“You bloody idiot Liam,” Harry screamed through the phone. “You dumb idiot!” Harry got up from his couch, storming up to his bedroom. He handed Louis his other phone and tells him to dial King’s number. “Do you know where he was headed? Any clues?”

_I know nothing at all. Do you think he’ll be okay?_

“No, I sincerely don’t!”

“King’s on the phone,” Louis told Harry, unsure what was completely going on.

Harry turns to Liam on the phone telling him, “I’ll call you back” before cutting the phone. He instructs King to let his private detectives go on a hunt for Niall. _Pronto!_

“I hope he’s okay,” Harry said worriedly. Louis smiled at him – a sad smile – and hugged him tightly. Harry snuggled to his neck. “It’s going to be fine,” Louis assured him. “You said King has the best of the best detectives and they can find people within minutes. They’ll find Niall.”

“I hope so,” Harry said. He lightly pressed his lips to Louis’, snuggling closer to him and pressing Play on the DVD.

 Little did they all know that he was knocked out cold by four men, alone, in an old, haunted house far away from London.

 

 

_And to the rest of the world… Niall James Horan had disappeared off the face of the earth._

****

**_~ fin ~_ **

**_ _ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN  
> DUN  
> DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN
> 
> Reached the END of the second book of the [Hanger In A Closet] series and onto the THIRD ONE: -bulletprxxf lxve-
> 
> In the third one this is what will happen: “HUH” AND “WHAT THE FUCKITY” MOMENTS will be solved like like did Niall really disappear?  
> Will Liam feel bad for him & take him back?  
> Will Larry really survive with Modest!? If not will, Elounor come back? [Prolly not] [this IS a Larry fanfic, duh]  
> What about Zayn, will the world forgive him for being Mr X?  
> And the dreaded Georgia, Harry’s older sister, is BAAAAAAAAAACK?!?!?!?!? AND WHY IS SHE BACK?! 
> 
> WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE BOYS NOW THAT THEY’RE BACK FINALLY HOME?


End file.
